Sunday 15 May 2016

BFC 3-0 Walsall, Saturday 14th May 2016

'He's sh*t, he's lame, he scores in every game.'
The message is clear: build a better Barnsley by knocking it down.

In news hot off the press, I am an idiot.  On the train up, having just discussed how to get to Walsall for the 2
nd leg, Dave asks me why I’m marking a bunch of books.  ‘Well, I’ve gotta get through them.  It’s Year 8 Parents Evening on Thursday.’  Oh.  We make the play-offs approximately once every blue moon and I can’t make the away leg cos of a prior commitment.  Still, at least it’s on telly.  And we’re 3-0 up so it won’t matter anyway (!)
The Barnsley diet: Percy Turners and pure lard

YES!  Three-nil up from the 1
st leg.  Dreamland.  Word in the pub beforehand was we’d take a draw, or even a 0-1, cos we know we’ll destroy Walsall away and, besides, Walsall have the best away record in the division.  The Super Reds make all of this a nonsense.  We cruise it, SSW scoring twice and putting one foot and a couple of arms into that there game at Wembley.  Cancel the camping trip I have planned for the Bank Holiday.
Must be a big game; crowd outside Walkabout
I thought we were comfortable throughout, even though they missed 3 decent chances.  The least they could have done was test Davies, which they barely did.  Hecky’s comment that we’d be in a better position cos of our big game experience this season was prescient; Walsall completely bottled it, despite having nearly 60% possession.  (40% is the new 60% anyway; ask Leicester.)

When was the last time this was full?

I wasn’t even sat in my usual seat, so that didn’t jinx us.  My dad took his mate, so, as I perused the upper tier on t’web, I hit on an idea: I’d go in the Ponty.  There might even be an atmosphere!  The good old days!  And what an atmosphere.  It was buzzing throughout.  It was a bit like Wigan last week, a full stand of Reds behind the goal getting behind their team.  I was a bit gutted though that my seat in Row Z didn’t catch any crosses from the ghost of Tom Williams.  But if Wigan was my fave away game of the season…and Oxford my fave neutral…then this has to be my favourite home game – of years.  It really was brilliant and anyone not there missed out.  Well, if you insist on living in Vienna, Adelaide, Bergen, Singapore, Witney, etc…


It's a beautiful day...I'm coming over all U2.

The crowd were never wavering in their support and we got our reward just before half time.  Having already had a goal (wrongly) disallowed for offside (Isgrove sliding in Hammill’s sublime cross), SSW pulls a ball back across goal for Hammill to sidefoot into an empty net.  Only he misses the goal completely, it hits a defender, and still goes in.  Who says we never get lucky?  This is compounded early in the 2
nd half when Winnall actually manages to put his foot through a shot (I didn’t think he had it in him) and it loops in over the keeper.  Who says we never get lucky?  I make that 3 deflected goals in 2 games.  Still, as Alan Shearer would say, ‘if you don’t buy a ticket…’.  

YOOOOUUUUU REDS!!!!!!!!!!!!

A couple of minutes later and Super Sammy Winnall has topped becoming the world’s worst 22 goal a season striker (last week) to being the world’s worst 24 goals a season striker this.  And fair play, it’s a great goal, as he bursts through a couple of challenges and lifts the balls over the keeper with his left.  The finish was reminiscent of THAT Michael Owen goal against Argentina (though obviously, SSW is a better player than HIM).  I am another 20 pounds lighter thanks to that second goal. Thanks, Sammy.

Under the stand at half time.

It’s 3-0 and there’s more than half an hour to go.  While we never actually showboated, we never really went for the jugular.  Several times we broke 3 on 3, but the end product wasn’t there.  Will we live to regret such generosity?  I know we nearly did, when they broke and they shunned a golden opportunity.  Thus, the tie is neatly poised – in our favour.  But go a goal down early in the 2nd leg and Walsall could still make something of this game.  Let’s not make history by becoming the 1
st side to throw away a three goal 1st leg play off lead.

*** SSW.  Scores 2, sets up another.  Always liked him. 
** Roberts.  Wins everything AND can play.
* Isgrove.  Ran around.  He likes running around.  Though should’ve squared it once instead of being greedy.

Londontykes Top 3:
*** Roberts  ** Winnall  * Isgrove

pre-match panorama.

Despatches:

I don’t know where to start.  They were all great.  

Onwards and upwards!  


Drink du jour:
 A 6.5% IPA, followed by an Erdinger, then the IPA again…followed by vodka, orange and champagne (not all together) on the train.  Y’know, together with the lie in this morning, I could really go for 5:30 kick-offs in a big way.  Not sure I need to be paying £4 for a programme though, however many colour photos I get.  Did I fall asleep on the bus?  I can't actually remember.  Maybe I didn't.  I know I fell asleep on the couch.  Went to bed at half four. Deleriously happy.


Away:
 Just over 2,000.  They didn’t look very lively either.  Shellshocked?
‘East Stand, give us a song ……
West Stand, give us a song ……Walsall, give us a song …..’

The Damage:
£15 ent
£36 travel
£4 prog
£4 scarf (half price)
£5 t-shirt (half price)
= £64

Drunken Londontykes back in Kings Cross
Fans and friends outside the latest incarnation of the cod Irish pub
Toby meets and greets
Match action in front of the Walsall 2,000.

Looking towards the away end.

A packed out East Stand and Corner Stand.
The players head towards their mates / WAGS.

Full time, 3-0.

Anything to stop ppl watching the match as they leave early.
The Ponty!





Tuesday 10 May 2016

Wigan Athletic 1-4 BFC, Sunday 8th May 2016


‘Brazil, it’s just like watching Brazil.’

Wigan Pier.  Well, you have to...

I cannot have been the only one to wake up beaming today.  From bottom of the table after the Blunts home game (manager: Little Lee) we have risen like the proverbial to snatch a play-off place on the final league game of the season.  And what a glorious way to do it!  We go away to the league champions and DESTROY them, even being good enough to give them a goal start before the simple task of popping  4 goals past them.  And yet it didn’t start so brightly…

The DW

Scowen was skinned 5 times in the first quarter of an hour by Wildschut and from one attack they finally do go ahead.  Of course, Winnall claims the assist, passing them the ball when we were 3 on 3 (a rare foray into their half at this point) and one pass later and Wildschut is clear down the left.  His low cross is then calamitously not dealt with by Mawson, and while the home fans appeal for a pen, their forward knocks it home.  We look truly against it at this point, as the away end went quiet.  ‘Get Winnall off’, ‘stick a right back on’ (do we have any? – could bring White on at left back and switch George.)  


The teams come out.

No, we don’t change a thing.  Heckingbottom is either a tactical genius or has some cajones.  He certainly had more faith than anyone around me.  Even the granddad next to me who I’d never met before said ‘I’ve had enough of Winnall.’  Who hasn’t?  He’s the sh*ttest popular striker we’ve had since Dire and by half time he was on 22 for the season.

#21 was a beauty, as we show once again that we’re at our best when Winnall isn’t even playing; he’s lying prostrate after colliding with the keeper, having not been fast enough to get better purchase when one-on-one.  We pick up the loose ball and Fletcher rounds a defender who brings him down. Penalty all day long.  Funnily enough, I don’t remember any Reds fans complimenting the ref for not stopping play, with Winnall clutching his head.  SSW makes a miraculous recovery to stroke the ball low to the keeper’s right.  I think it made the net.  Just.

Get ready to party!

With half time approaching, I said I’d be glad if we could get in at one-all.  But Little Lloyd Isgrove has other ideas, skipping past 2 (or 3?) players before getting his close range shot off.  The keeper saves, but who’s there…on the sniff..why it’s Super Sammy Winnall, who wellies the ball in scuffs it home from 3 yards.  (It later turns out he's somehow knocked it against his left shin with his right foot.  He is the luckiest player I know.)  He reminds me of this kid who plays 5 aside with us sometimes.  Can’t control a ball, can’t dribble, can’t tackle, but will pop up with the odd toe poke.  Everyone except his best mate hates him, natch.  WE ARE WINNING!!!!!!!!  F*** Scunthorpe or whatever they’re doing (beating the Blunts as it goes; you can’t trust the Blunts to do ANYTHING, can you?)  All we have to do is see this game out and we’re there.


Pre-match panorama

Half time and Wigan take off their star player, that winger.  Injured?  Or does the manager just fancy a look at somebody else, for next season?  Who cares?  Cheers Wigan manager!  He’s even brought Reece Wabara on!  Christ, he’s giving us this game.  Wabara proceeds to show why I have no idea how he’s made the divisional team of the year.  BFC’s 3rd best right back.  I really don’t get it, at all.
But the 2nd half is all us.  We look a threat every time we have the ball and get just desserts as Fletcher chases down a weak punch from the keeper and pulls it back to Captain Conor.  ‘He needs to shoot more’ said Selwood, pre-match.  He delivers, via a wicked deflection.  (‘Curled in superbly’ I think The Sun said, arf arf).  We were right behind it and watching the keeper scramble (and fail) to get across is only 2nd in my list of favourite goals this season to that crazy Fleetwood OG t’other week. He was never going to get there.  The away end goes berserk.  It’s barely 10 mins into the 2nd half and WE HAVE WON THIS GAME.  We are in the play-offs.  Actually, we all think that, but then spend a few minutes worrying…this lot are top of the table…if they get one back, they can get 2.

Yes, I KNOW it's the second half!

But upsteps Brownhill with the free kick of the season.  It was just to the left of the goal as we looked, perfect for Hourihane’s left foot.  Conor walks away from it.  What’s happening here?  Oh, THAT’S what’s happening here, as Brownhill whammies it over the wall and down, a la Ronaldo.  (Mawson hit one of these earlier this season; is that what BFC training is? Free kicks and crossbar challenges?)  It is a BEAUT!  Now we know we’re up in the play-offs.  ‘It’s just like watching Brazil’ is sung with even more gusto and belief than at 3-1.  Hell, many of us are even generous enough to stand up when the Wigan 200 chant ‘Stand up for the champions’, though this soon changes into ‘Stand up if you’re going up’ and everyone stands up.

...and then it was 4-1!  Or 1-4.  Whatever.

There’s still time for Roberts to throw himself into a block, preventing a certain goal, and we see out the game watching Hammill showboat Wigan to death. I don’t know what was more predictable, the frustrated hack, or Hammill reacting badly.  Good job Hammill had any amount of players jumping in to prevent him getting sent off alongside McCann.  (As an aside, how stupid do you have to be to get sent off in the last minute when you’ve won the league?  There’s him missing the 1st 3 matches next season…)

That magnificent away support (from Twitter)

*** Roberts.  The rock by which all things BFC are built.  What a player, determined to the end.  Won everything.  A rock.  (As another random aside, I was channel hopping the other day and I came across some godawful film.  I couldn’t understand how someone could act quite so badly.  ‘Who’s this?’ I asked.  ‘The Rock’.  Has anyone seen his film with ‘Scorpion’ in the title?  Garbage.  So I watched 5 minutes in awe before kicking the telly to death.)

** Isgrove.  I know he made Andy laugh, beig unable to control his feet a couple of times in the 1st half, but he ran at them, set up a goal (finally, though inadvertently) and got a couple of theirs carded in the 2nd half for lunges.  He’s faster than you think!
* Fletcher.   I hope he gets us up before he leaves.  Looks better and better every week and led the line superbly.  Set up 2 goals.
Londontykes' Top 3:*** Roberts  ** Isgrove  * Fletcher

The players give thanks.
Despatches:
At one point I looked at their scoreboard.  ‘2:00’ it said.  Christ, I’m not stupid.  I KNOW it’s the second half.  I looked again a quarter of an hour later.  ‘2:15’.  Oh.
Davies had very little to do but looked comfortable enough picking up through balls.  Scowen recovered and was fabulous second half.  It’s called speed AND fitness, as he was constantly on the overlap.  I can’t say I noticed Williams though Mawson played well, outside of the early aberration.  Brownhill and Hourihane sat, allowing the wingers to do the damage, while SSW was SSW; appalling and scores 2.  Though I do remember him flicking a ball to Hourihane once which was quite good.  Hecky even managed to bring on McCourt (not that one), Chapman and Toney for the last 10 mins or so.  There was only one team going to score and it wasn’t them.
Drink du jour: Found a fabulous bar right next to the station, so that would be Paulaner pls.  Bought a ‘growler’ for the journey back though it took so long I had Andy barking at me to get a move on; we had a train to catch.

Away: 4770.  What a game, what an atmosphere.  Today was up there with the greats.

Well done Latics.  Well done BFC.  Onwards and upwards, the journey continues.
Yooooooouuuuuuuu Redssssssssssssss!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
A

The Damage:
31 travel

20 ent

2 zine

0 prog.  Sold out.

Outside the ground.  Anywheresville.
Some of the Reds' massive massive.
The Wigan vocal 200 to our left.
The teams come out.
The walk to the ground.  Very pleasant.
Flags out for the lads.
A celebratory growler of Paulaner on the train.
Two very happy Beckenhamtykes.
Great view, great day, great result.  Great.



Monday 9 May 2016

Fulham 1-0 Bolton Wanderers, Saturday 7th May 2016

Fulham 1-0 Bolton Wanderers, Championship, att. 17,207

Welcome to .....

Final game of the season and where better to finish than underachieving Fulham versus relegated Bolton?  For me, as a Barnsley fan, it was a scouting mission for whichever division we'd be in next season - the Championship or League 1.  Plus, on a stunning day, a chance to enjoy a scenic cycle to the game, much of it along the Thames.  I have thus decided football should be a summer sport.  I rather like being able to wear shorts and t-shirt while idling watching some 'athletes' (I use the term loosely) run about.

Tha' she blows!  

Mind, despite the idyllic nature of a trip to Craven Cottage (surely the most pleasureable of the capital's grounds to visit) it wasn't my idea.  A mate suggested it...after all, there'd be no more (league) football for 3 months.  So it was that I joined an Ipswich fan and a Darlington fan to watch a stress-free game without anything riding in it for us.  Basically, we didn't give a s***.

Pre-match on Stevenage Road

And good job too, where an outrageously-priced round at the Crabtree pub (nice pub garden though, as we basked) was followed by even more outrageous entry prices: £30 to pay on the day in the 'mixed area' Putney End.  Jesus, I think I'm still recovering.  30 quid, for a bottom end of the second division game with nothing on it.  We are fools.  (I even looked up the price the day before; £25.  I presumed Fulham wouldn't possibly increase it by any more on the day.  How wrong I was.)

Cheer now - there may not be chance later.

However, can you put a price on seeing the legendary Emile Heskey for (surely) one last time on a football pitch?  Yes, we didn't realise he was still going.  'He must be older than you' said my mate (who's only about 4 months younger than me, cheeky tw*t).  And when Heskey's effort was the only one which even came close for Bolton (by 'close' I mean over the bar) then it's no wonder the Trotters are wandering into the 3rd tier.  Their one redeeming feature was their fans, who maybe numbered 1500 and sang non-stop.  It must be some season when you chant 'Let's pretend we've scored a goal' before everyone goes nuts.  It's been that kind of season for them.

The cottage; under repair.

The match was generally poor, though Fulham went close several times.  Only Bolton keeper Amos kept them in the game, making some super saves as he dived around trying to rescue his ailing defence.  (Maybe they, like us, couldn't give a s***.  Probably off in the summer.)  And just as we'd settled for nil-nil - surely our punishment for being stupid enough to pay £30 to see this shambles - Fulham's Cairney popped up on the right, cut inside and drove a left footer into the far corner.  A great finish, entirely not in keeping with the game.

Match panorama
Then it was back to the pub and another pint.  And a Bolton fan wishing my team luck the next day at Wigan.  'Hope you beat the tw*ts.  They're our biggest rivals.'  How times have changed at Burnden Park the Reebok...well, whatever it's called these days.

The Damage:
£30 entry
£3.50 programme (even the programmes are more expensive than I'm used to)


Bicycles must be pushed...cars driven.  A posh riverside estate.
Craven Cottage from across the Thames.
The Hammersmith End.
'Still believe.'  The Grade II listed Stevenage Road Stand (as was).
Looking towards the Hammersmith End.
Those Bolton fans.
The Cottage under repair.
Back of the Stevenage Road Stand (on my way home, hence empty!)

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