Barnsley 1-1 Stoke City, Tuesday 8th March 2022

‘Why he fetches ‘im on ah dunt know, cos he’s s***.’

It is the day after my dad leaves us for somewhere better and what a fitting tribute from the Super Reds, conceding an injury time equaliser to a struggling Stoke side. It’s what he would have wanted. Mind, that slightly disguises the fact injury time was 10 minutes and we were only 5 minutes in. Yet another ‘medical emergency’ in the crowd means the match has to stop halfway through the second half. WHY!!?? So people can have a good nose instead of watching play? The match going on doesn’t stop stewards and first aiders from doing their jobs, especially in the half empty (half!? We should be so lucky!) stands at Oakwell. Don’t get former St. John’s ambulance member Wadd started on this either, he’s more ranty than me!

On an attached note, let me give you a real life conundrum. Sarah’s granddad died at a football match, West Brom, heart attack. So, does her dad a) support West Brom out of loyalty to his dad b) support anybody BUT West Brom, cos it’s where his dad died (junior was 5 years old) or c) support whichever half decent team is near to where he lives? Of course, the real life Mr Turner supported Norwich (not too far from Newmarket, but by no means the nearest league team). What a time too, as the Canaries beat the likes of Bayern Munich. Fast forward 30 years and he’s moved to Lichfield, in the Burton / Derby / Brum triangle. Stick with Naarwich? Follow local side Burton? Or take on Villa cos….well, they have a bit of potential about them (and there’s a direct train to Villa Park from Lichfield). Of course it’s the latter. Nearby West Brom weren’t even considered. (He narrowed it down to Derby or Villa when they were both in the Championship. That was a lucky escape for him.)

Sorry, the Super Reds. As Farnham said, Stoke came on 3 defeats and no win in 6. Midtable, going nowhere, problies too far off the play-offs too. Absolutely ideal opposition. They’ll turn up, have no fight, and we’ll turn them over with ease. So there was only one team in it first half – Stoke. They hit the post, had a free header just wide, and a deflected shot which so wrong-footed Collins he’d have had no chance it it’d gone the other side of the post. We offered….Callum Brittain. The only Reds player to have a shot on target (a near post effort which the keeper did well to turn and get down to) and a peach of a low cross which the keeper smothered under Styles’ attention. But at least the latter ran TOWARDS the ball and PAST defenders. Nobody else up front does. For the most part, I thought Iseka had morphed into Morris. Why do we persist in hiding BEHIND defenders when crosses are about to be put in? These aren’t Sunday league defenders. They will miss the ball completely perhaps once a season*.

*unless you’re Jasper Moon. I can think of twice he’s done it in the last month. But then again, he’s not a Championship defender.

Still, half-time and we’re still in it, despite (because of!?) coach Asbaghi’s formation. Wolfe’s been dropped, we’ve gone 3 at the back (cos that’s worked all season!) and now left back Vita is playing the ‘Clarke Oduor role’ scooting about the right wing with negligible effect. I’m sure these managers think they’re geniuses, thinking of new and crazy ways to baffle the opposition fans into submission. Something strange was certainly happening, as left sided centre half Kitching appeared most prominent in attack down the left wing. Still, my favourite Reds moment came when Morris broke down the left and hooked in a cross….to the 5ft 4 Vita, marked by 2 giant centre halves and a goalkeeper.

Then we scored. Quina holds onto the ball 9 seconds, dribbles all the way along the box, before turning and doubling back, and unleashing a worldy into the top corner with his left foot. It’s QPR all over again, though rather than screaming ‘pass it’ at him, this time it was ‘PART WITH THE BALL!’ Mind, if you’d seen the rest of his performance, you’d realise why he’d given up trying to pass it. Did he lose the ball EVERY other time he had it, or just most times? He was shocking all night. Needless to say he was the official man of the match.

Then we drove forward, looking for a second, to kill the game off. Or, more accurately, we sat back and invited Stoke on, our one decent break ending with us going backwards to ensure Stoke got all their men behind the ball, before we carelessly passed it out of play. Asbaghi was in on the act too. Let’s chuck Wolfe on to shore up midfield. Or stand around with our centre halves. Let’s put Cole on to grab a goal on the break. Ah, Cole. Legend. Does any other team apart from Barnsley bring back a player who was so poor the first time that we had to give him a second chance to prove his inability? I can understand getting former ‘greats’ back…even though it usually ends in tears…but Devante Cole? Anyway, there we are, 5 minutes into injury time and I am still not sure whatthehell he was trying to do. Control it? Turn his man? He is on the edge of our f***ing box and he appears to stand on the ball with the effect he stops it dead for a Stokie to step up and welly it into the corner. Great finish, great move (!). Perhaps Cole could do this next time on the edge of THEIR box. (Note: we still need a player capable of the finish. Quina, anyone?)

One-all. I see we’re now 5 points behind Reading. It’s the hope what kills you. Win this…beat Reading at home and WE’RE ABOVE THEM (let’s ignore the other games). We didn’t. We aren’t. We won’t be. We’re going down.

Onwards and upwards!

*** Helik. Had Josh Maja in his pocket.
**Kitching. Decent defending…and our main attacking threat 2nd half
* Collins. Saved a couple of certain goals by tipping out crosses….though well done covering players for sweeping up the mess.

Official MOTM: Quina. Scored a wondergoal yet was bloody awful all night.

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. Helik 2. Quina 3. Collins

Despatches:
The Stoke fans obviously enjoyed the game. We scored…’you’re nothing special, we lose every week’…and a full on punch up broke out between a couple of hefty lads in the away end. Now THAT would be a reason to stop the game. Proper windmilling too, before fans and stewards dragged the pair apart. Booooo, you’re no fun.

I thought Brittain was a tad hard done to with some comments. True, he couldn’t stop a cross all game, but they usually had an overlap (as opposed to a ‘Delap’, he’s retired now). The centre halves and keeper dealt with it all though. Gomes swept up well at times, though I still preferred the formation with Wolfe in the team. Or ‘the winning formation’ as it’s called. Shirley made some clever runs and keeps the opposition defenders on their toes in a way Cole doesn’t. Morris held the ball up and without his physical presence we’d be nothing. Styles looked keen, but it either comes off or it doesn’t, and it didn’t. Quina was dreadful. He really was. Maybe coming to Oakwell is like being on the school team. He knows he’s the best player, so why pass a ball to someone who won’t know what to do with it, when he can take on 6 players (and the rest!) and rasp one into the top corner? He’s never gonna part with the ball now…

To end with a positive….I haven’t seen Benson or Palmer in weeks (months!?) and my blood pressure is coming down commensurately. I do miss being angry the entire 90 minutes though.

Oh, and although I tried, I couldn’t walk through the Alhambra (locked – I tried), or have my mates leave me behind in the pub, so no wonder we didn’t win. Just saying.

Drink du jour: Beavertown Neck Oil in the (new) Market Kitchen, the swanky dining area above the market.

Away: 1,151. 21 seconds in and ‘Barnsley’s a sh*thole, I wanna go home.’ We have a new seasonal leader! (***Stoke fans: if you ask the man at the turnstile nicely, he’ll find a steward to let you out. Tell them it is your civil right not to be held inside Oakwell against your will and you would like to return whence you came.)

Number of league games since the Super Reds went on to win a game having conceded an equaliser: 46. (Bournemouth away, last season, by my reckoning) A season’s worth.

The Damage:
c. £35 petrol
£3 programme
= c. £38

The Tunes:
BBC 6Music (background, whilst chuntering on.)

Stoke City 1-1 BFC, Wednesday 15th September 2021

‘Barnsley should be charged with rape. They raped Stoke tonight.’

This was an unexpected treat. Unsure of what, if any, away games I can go to this season, I chanced upon a midweek trip to Stoke with Molly and Loko in the charabanc. TAFKAL (The Artists Formerly Known as Londontykes) decided this was the chance to tick off another ground we’ve never seen the Super Reds, and no, we don’t ever have to come back. It’s bad enough that we were running late (my fault) but what is it with newbuilds? They’re in the middle of nowhere, and yet parking is completely inadequate. How do they expect fans to get there? The train station is 2 miles away. The surrounds appeared to be one big industrial estate, charmingly named after former Stoke City legends. Indeed, if a statue to Gordon Banks is anything to go by, we have Stoke to thank for England winning the World Cup. (Don’t let the fact he was a Leicester player at the time deter your thinking.)

Back to the car parking. We’d already given Molly a note: he was allowed to go to the stadium all by himself, cos he had his match ticket. Loko and I still had to pick ours up. All we had to do was park the car, but don’t bother expecting signs, or help. The car park by the ground was for people more important than us. ‘Try up there’ the stewardess pointed. We did, and 10 minutes later we were back to her. All the pop-up car parks were full, or gates locked. The biggest car park had been turned into a Covid test centre. Since when was Coronavirus more important than football? We tried another offshoot of a roundabout named after a former Stokie and got lucky….the last space in some firm’s car park, 6 quid. Good job they’re now second division and no longer fill the ground. How did car parking work when they played Man U, et al?

Now, where do we pick our tickets up from? Not at the turnstile, it seemed. We doubled back round the enclosure (think Birmingham City; remember, these barriers are to PROTECT us from angry locals, not to peeve us). So we were peeved. Went to the box office…no, our tickets are on the turnstile. Of course they are. Why don’t the stewards know these things? (That’s rhetorical, I’m not expecting an answer.) We went back to where we came from. Oh well, at least we haven’t missed a….OH F***. They’ve only gone and scored. We’re not even in the ground yet, but handily, we were far enough away (having had to walk round that fence again) that we got a perfect view of the big screen and an action reply. Who was that idiot centre half slicing the ball for a tap-in? (Helik; I was pleased it wasn’t one of our younger, less experienced players.)

Oh well. I expected a long night. We got in and grabbed the nearest seats to the gangway. Not a great view, but the chance to hear a couple of fans describe every single one of our players as a ‘c***’ during the next 20 minutes. All the way up till one of said ‘c***s’ equalised with a 25 yard free kick – welcome to the 2021-22 party, Cauley Woodrow! Actually, I thought it was further out, but I fancied Woodrow, I told Loko as much. Afterwards, when I said I told him so, Loko said he agreed with me. So, a piece of history there for anybody who knows us. (Normal service was resumed in the car later, when Molly described us as the ‘immovable c*** versus the irreversible c***’. There was a lot of Anglo-Saxon going on last night.)

For those with a better understanding of tictacs, we were apparently playing a ‘3-4-3 in possession, 5-4-1 without’. So that’ll be a 5-4-1 then. Or 1-0-0-0 as I saw it, Brad Collins versus Stoke City. If he’d been allowed further up the pitch, I’m convinced we would have won. Save after save he made and how we were getting to half time drawing, I know not. So Palmer undoes the good work in added time with a stupid little flick which is intercepted, and having had possession, our defence are out of position. One pass, they’re clean through and Collins races out. Was it a dive? Was it a foul? I have to say, in real time, I thought the ref had to give it, but I appreciate tellybox viewers saying it was a dive. With the Sky crew split between yes and no, you can hardly blame the ref for giving it. Or not giving it. But Brad makes a super save, being brave enough to stand still and tip the head high penalty off the bar and away. YOU F***ING REDS! I’m starting to enjoy this game.

2nd half was a much more open affair, with us trying to Arsenal it in by playing lots of intricate triangles on the edge of their box (much preferable to in our own box, as was last game I saw). Still though we only fashioned one really good chance, as Leon Brittain (?) fizzed a ball in from the right and Big Vic (on for the ineffective Iseka at HT) for some inescapable reason, tries to direct it in with his left thigh. What’s his right boot for? That said, Collins was peppered and made some incredible saves at the other end, invariably from a break where half our team were the wrong side of the ball. (That’s not a criticism, I liked that we were taking risks to try and win this game.)

Then, with 5 mins left, Stoke were down to 10, as Smith was sent off for having his studs raised in a tackle. It didn’t look much to me, and seeing it on replay, I have to say I think the ref got this one wrong. A yellow at best. How’s the guy MEANT to make a tackle? (Still, it juxtaposes nicely with the ludicrous Billing tackle last week, which was given as a yellow. Refs, eh!?) Things were turning fractious, and as Schopp prevented a Stoke counter by playing around with the ball as it left play, all hell broke loose. Coaches and diddymen from both sides piled into each other, with the result Stoke 2, Barnsley 1 – red cards on the coaching staff. The ref then couldn’t wait to blow for full time. Did he even play any added time?

Onwards and upwards!

*** Collins. Official Sky MOTM, and serenaded by the away support at full-time, ‘Super, Super Brad…’ Though what really impressed me were the heartfelt congrats he got from 2nd choice Walton at full-time. Our reserve keeper is a better man than me. (I’d have congratulated Collins last match, when he fumbled one in.)
** Styles. While everyone else stands still, Styles actually moves for the ball, and is the only player (bar Oduor!) capable of beating a player. His burst from midfield gained the foul from which Cauley scored. (Oh, and you can add a Collins assist, his long punt out wide allowed Cauley to chest it down rather than be bullied out of it.)
* Woodrow. I’m not as confident as some that he had a good game. Couldn’t win a header, runs through treacle, collapses (again) following weekly ritual of centre half using him as a punch bag….but scored a cracker.

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. Collins 2. Woodrow 3. Styles

Despatches:
Came out the ground to be met by a Stokie with open arms…’Come on Barnsley…do you want….a hug?’ He looked neither gracious or cuddly and his menacingly baffling antics continued as he walked behind us, telling the young lad with him (presumably his son) that we should be put in prison….Stoke had been raped. As I said, we don’t have to come back.

I’d like to give my usual resounding judgement on players I’ve only seen for 45 minutes or less (Iseka, Gomes, Hondermarck) but in truth I’d never heard of any them, lesser still noticed them on the pitch. Sorry. Big Vic came on and caused carnage…for 10 minutes. One burst through past 2 defenders was reminiscent of Brooce Dire at Brum…tho Stoke had an extra defender on the cover. Sibbick impressed me with some cover at our end, inbetween being nowhere to be seen. And Freezer? I heard he had a couple of early chances, but otherwise looked way out of his depth, and easily outpaced every time he chased a ball. (I am amazed to learn, on checking, that he played the full 90 minutes.)

Big thanks to Loko for driving (I left my car at his place) as well as Molly for the chit chat. Nevermind the football, I miss talking drivel with my mates about the likes of Dan Crowley, flatpack stadia* and the fanbase of sides from the Potteries.

*Why are Stoke’s changing rooms in some cheap looking secondary school gymnasium looking building in one corner? Did they forget to include them in the plans for the ground?

Meal du jour: A can of coke, in my very own freezer bag. And some rather delicious ham and pease pudding sandwiches, topped by Opal Fruits and a Tunnocks Caramel Wafer. The evening meal of champions.

Away: c.700 (Att: 17,832)

The Damage:
£25 ent
c.£25 petrol
= c.£50

The Tunes:
The Race for Space (Public Service Broadcasting)
The Mind Is A Terrible Thing To Taste (Ministry)
Tragic Kingdom (No Doubt)

BFC 2-4 Stoke City, Saturday 9th November 2019

‘3 of my favourite 4 moments of the day involved going to the toilet’

Welcome to...Oakwell at 3:05pm

Cars have an obvious advantage over trains: flexibility.  Go where you like, when you like.  ‘Cept when you’re forced off the A1 due to flooding, you’re stuck in a traffic jam and you’re desperate for a p***.  And that wasn’t the 8 year old in the car, that was ME.  Yes, what a day.  Nevermind the result (can it get any worse?)…it took the best part of 6 hours to drive from Sidcup to Barnsley and we were lucky to make kick-off.  No time for beers, no time to see anyone, no time for chish and fips (unless you were prepared to miss kick-off; I was.  I was starving and I knew a trip to the chippy would provide more enjoyment than anything I’d see at Oakwell.)

I got in about 5 past 3.  I thought I was later.  As I walked down the hill to Oakwell, I could see (and not hear) the stadium in complete silence.  I honestly thought the match had started, but no, it was the obligatory Remembrance Day minute’s silence.  And what makes one prouder of our nation’s heroes than catching sight of three of them, in full uniform, enjoying a fag outside the East Stand as I entered?  (As a member of the armed forces, I guess there’s more ways to worry about death than cancer.)

A decent away turnout (I later learnt they'd had free travel).

I timed my entrance well though, in time for the opening (comedy) goal…which I still missed due to checking the teams on my phone.  Keeper Collins takes a free kick from the right back spot, plays it along the floor straight to Clucas, who wellies it in from just inside our half.  Wouldn’t have happened with Adam Davies in goal – he’d have sliced it into the stand.  (As an aside, I was told Davies DID have a role to play today, earning his reputed £19k/week at Stoke by helping the forwards with shooting practice.)  Oakwell historian Dave Wood told me at half time he couldn’t remember the Super Reds scoring a goal from that range, but I remember a Chron report in the 80s once describing a John MacDonald 45 yard effort.  Grimsby H, midweek?

Brilliant.  One down after 8 mins to a comedy goal to the only team below us in the table.  Could it get any worse?  (You know it could…)  We attack the away end and have the proverbial penalty appeal turned down.  Even I thought it was a pen, as some Stokie handles the ball above his head.  But maybe that’s a ‘natural position’ in Hanley, I dunno.  A minute later, James McClean finds himself one-on-one with Mowatt in the box.  No contest.  He dummies one way, goes the other, and Mowatt takes him out.  So much for the Ponty booing the Catholic non-respector of Our Fallen.  Pen despatched.  We’ve played well, we’ve had chances, and we’re losing.  Stop me if you think that you've heard this one before…(Jonesy was playing The Smiths in the car earlier - perhaps we should have this on repeat?)

Like our season, it's all a blur.  Stoke bag #2 from the spot.

Nothing to worry about though.  We gave a better side than Stoke a two goal headstart last week and STILL got a draw, so….we pull one back not long after half time.  Sub Thomas plays McGeehan in, and the miscontrol is rescued by a toepoke high into the net.  GAME ON!!!!  It gets even better, as Thomas is chopped down in the box for a pen….except it never happened.  The ref somehow misses it and Mowatt drags the ball wide from a good position.  I’m in the East Upper and it looked nailed on.  Jonesy and Loko either side of the Ponty confirm it.  And none of us are biased, are we?

Stoke wrap it up, 1-3, 1-4.  The 3^rd is a scramble off a corner.  I thought one of our players was fouled, but no, I’ve since seen it on telly and 2 of our defenders crash into each other trying to clear.  We are hapless.  Then Thomas loses the ball running sideways in our own half and a loose ball runs to Clucas to slam another one in, this time from a mere 25 yards.  Seems he also injured himself kicking the ball too hard.  That’ll teach him.

The Ponty v Stoke.

Oh, and nearly forgot.  Schmidt came on and scored.  Mowatt, rather than continue his impression of Stephen McPhail by looking incredibly assured and only kicking the ball sideways, sprang the offside trap with a through ball and Schmidt, in acres of space, ran onto it and finished like a pro.  Still, no pressure when you’re out the game.  We never threatened again.

It is not even mid-November and time is running out.  It would be nice, presuming we’re going down, to do it with more than a whimper, but I don’t see it.  ‘Should we give Murray the job?’ asked Jonesy.  No.  Will we?  Undoubtedly.  He’s cheap, and grateful.  From doing nothing much as Mansfield boss, to our head coach…yeah, I’d take that as well.  And whilst some saw it as promising that we’d drawn against 2 or 3 decent teams…and kidded themselves that ‘we look more solid’….we’ve now lost to Stoke and Huddersfield, the only teams who’d been below us since October.  We’re also scoring in every game – but conceding more.  Murray now averages 0.6 points a game.  Yeah, f*** it, give him the job.  Records are there to be broken and I reckon we could be down by February if we REALLY put our minds to it.

Onwards and…downwards!

*** No-one.  Everyone had something wrong with their game. 
** No-one.  Did anyone do enough to warrant a star?
* No-one.  Absolute garbage.

Londontykes' MOTM: 1. No-one 2. No-one 3. No-one

Our 'loyal' support leaves early.  Again.

Despatches:‘They’re there for the taking.’  I got a text from Wadd, sometime at the start of the second half.  Shame I didn’t read it till 1-4.  ‘Yes.  We only need 4 more.’

Collins.  Maaaan….of all the days.  The return of ex-keeper Adam Davies was no game to show he can do worse.  Made a couple of great saves later, once we’d lost.  Cavare.  Will someone tell him he still has to defend, even if he looks half decent ON the ball.  Sibbick.  Doesn’t suit this 3 man central defence at all.  Shame.  Halme.  Looked less assured than previous.  So much for ‘building up an understanding’ Diaby. I continue to have my doubts. Someone this size can’t turn or jump. Dougal...actually, was maybe alright. Maybe. McGeehan, in for Wilks, scored, but did little else. Cauley wasn’t bad tho. He won’t be here next season.

And did I mention Jonesy also gave a lift to his Stokie mate? And fair play to him, he didn’t rub it in. I think he was too ill.

Drink du jour: a solitary Franziskaner in the car.

Away: 3,266?  Something like that.

The Damage:
£20 petrol
= £20

The Tunes:

The Eminem Show (Eminem)
Triangulation (Scuba)
Claustrophobia (Scuba)

East Stand panorama v Stoke.

Ponty panorama v Stoke (cheers Jonesy!)

A present left on my desk, Monday morning.  Thanks.

Stoke City 1-2 Crystal Palace, Saturday 5th May 2018

Stoke City 1-2 Crystal Palace, att. 29,687

Welcome to ....

The end is in sight (in so many ways: the season; Stoke’s tenure in the Premiership) and Stoke is my 91st of the 92. Or is it 90? I shan’t count Spurs (for now) since their new stadium is pretty much on the footprint of the old one. But with Macclesfield back in the league, I’m technically back down to 90. Still, it’s good to have an aim. As my partner says ‘what will you do when you’ve completed the 92?’

A 3D map of the Britannia / Bet365

Stoke is an aberration on my part, in that I can’t quite understand how I’ve never been there. In the good old days they were second division regulars with Barnsley. And I’ve been to Port Vale 4 times (it has a charm). But, with their Premiership heartbeat running out, and Barnsley’s last match of the season just down the road at Derby the following day, I took the plunge: train and match tickets booked. Furthermore, The Captain was coming up from Southampton. Well, until I told him the week before that the kick-off time had changed: it was now 12:30. Bloody Sky! Fair dues to Stoke City FC, who took back the ticket (ripped in half and sellotaped back together by the Royal Mail) and gave me a full refund at 12:28pm.

£30 to see Stoke relegated.  Bargain.

I’d also made the mistake of booking one of them there ‘plus bus’ tickets you always get offered when you purchase rail tickets. I thought the stadium was about 4 miles away, too far to walk, but on further deliberation it was only about half an hour’s brisk walk away, along the canal. Turn right outside the station, turn right again at the lights, onto Leek Road, cross the canal and follow it to your left. Considering the fine weather, it was rather empty. But, along with Wigan, a traipse along the industrial waterways of England is just the job. No pier in Stoke though.

An old pottery kiln along the canal.

I’d gone for a ticket in the home end for this do-or-die match with Palace. Weeks ago it looked like ne or the other, but with Palace pulling off a couple of good results, it was simply s*** or bust for Stoke. I s’pose I was hoping for a Stoke collapse (given I’d come to a Prem game thinking they were going down), but, if Barnsley stayed up and Stoke went down, I’d be here anyway next season…thereby negating the need to come this time. Quandaries, eh?

My 1st glimpse inside the stadium.

The ground was virtually full and Stoke were in full song. Great noise from the Boothen End and the roof nearly came off when Shaqiri hit a free kick home. Just a point re: the Palace keeper (Hennessy?) Listen, Shaqiri only has one foot, and there’s only one place he’s going to try and put that free kick: just there. Where you should be. Nevermind the slight deflection off a Palace head.  If Stoke won their last two games, they’d probably stay up. So they only have themselves to blame; you take Peter Crouch off at your peril. 30 seconds later Palace were level, McArthur sidefooting in on the overlap after a lightning break. The Stoke players were broken, their crowd was broken. All hope seemingly extinguished, yet 22 minutes to play. Some started leaving early and, to be fair, they were right, the writing was on the wall. With 4 minutes left, and gaps everywhere in the Stoke team, Palace broke again and a despairing Shawcross interception diverted into the path of Van Aanholt to slide the ball through Butland’s legs.

Looking towards the Main Stand.

This was the cue for hordes to leave, which was a blessing to my ears, since the screamy bloke next to me was one of them. If I’ve heard the words ‘in there lad. IN THERE’ a hundred times, I would not exaggerate. Most of what he screamed was unintelligible, save for threatening Palace with death should they win, calling them ‘cockney c**ts’ and calling South London a ‘s***hole’. Has he been to Dulwich Village? I wouldn’t mind, but for the most part he reminded me of Get Carter: you’re a big lad, but you’re out of shape. I hope he enjoys his summer.

A disgruntled fan's shirt is thrown onto the pitch.

Still, I’ll give it to those who stayed. Despite defeat, they roared on their heroes, promising to be ‘Stoke until I die.’ And despite one fans efforts, shouting ‘Lambert Out’, the vast majority still seemed onboard.

I toyed with the idea of a bus back, but looked up the old Victoria Ground, walked halfway back to town along the canal, then turned off for the Victoria’s previous site. Having laid dormant for several years, it’s finally being developed. I hope it encompasses a suitable ‘memorial’. And walking back a different way brought me to an incredible pub, the Glebe, where I sat on a Chesterfield leather chair and reminisced with an old Stoke fan about music and football. He’d visit more often, but, guess what, football is too expensive these days, £34 in his bit. Should Barnsley stay up, I’ve promised to visit him again next season! (Note: Barnsley didn’t.)

Also, has anybody else noticed the Stoke accent is a mixture of Brummie and Scouse? It’c certainly…interesting.

England's Jack Butler is inconsolable.

The Damage:
£30 ent
£3.50 prog
£1.50 fanzine
= £35

The Tunes:
Singularity (Jon Hopkins)
Song For Alpha (Daniel Avery)
Claustrophia (Scuba)
Foxbase Alpha (St. Etienne)
Garlands (Cocteau Twins)

Bet 365 panorama v Palace.

Looking towards the away end.

Former England manager Roy Hodgson looks on.

Crouchy subbed.  Dearie me.

The Stoke tunnel...and changing rooms.

Lovely pitch.

The thin green/yellow line.

Match action.

Some people think it's all over....

The Stoke 'lap of (dis)honour'.

You'll not see his ilk for a while....a regretful Shaqiri.

Full time.

When they changed the name, did they change the seats?

Outside the Bet365.

See you in the Championship!