Brighouse Town 1-4 Sherwood Colliery, Saturday 29th March 2025

Brighouse Town 1-4 Sherwood Colliery, Northern Premier League East, Heffernan Utilities Stadium (St. Giles Road), att. 349

I’m on a schedule today. Basically, I’m off to a gig tonite and need to be home early enough to have dinner before making the drive to Manchester (my other half is not doing rail replacement buses which is fair enough). I’ve narrowed it down to Stocksbridge Park Steels, doing well in the Northern Premier League East, or Brighouse Town, who are not. I elect for the latter, purely on the basis that it’ll save me 10 minutes travel either way.

I’m not familiar with Brighouse (though I once changed trains here) and use the satnav to take me through town, up a hill and down a lane to the ground. I’m early, so enjoy a prime parking spot outside the Heffernan Utilities Stadium (!), even turning my car around. I’m all about the quick getaway today. Down an even smaller lane is the car park (pretty full already, presumably of players’ and officials’ cars) and I’m through the turnstile, down the side of a giant portacabin which acts as social club and refreshment kiosk.

You enter in one corner of the ground. I had no expectations, but this place is basic to say the least. A reflection of their relatively poor crowds for this level? The touchline to my left has a propped roof and a couple of rows of seats virtually the length of the pitch. (Wikipedia tells me there’s 100 seats, 200 covered, so that shows you how small this stand is.) The far goal is tightly enclosed by a fence, but you’re not allowed to stand here, so no circumference of the ground for me. Still, I can see trees and what looks like a new housing estate being built. The far touchline is bare, save for a football pitch behind, down a small bank. So every time the ball is kicked this side, someone has to run down the hill to fetch it.

The final side houses the social club, as well as the changing rooms, some 50 metres or so further away. Metal barriers have been placed to allow the players an unfettered walk to the pitch. Quite grand, in a way (a very small way). Most fans seem to stand at this end, with easy access to a pint or a burger. Today’s game has been billed as ‘Gilly’s Game’, I think in memory of a former player, so the crowd is up on usual – to 349. Still, small steps.

Today’s visitors are Sherwood Colliery, struggling and almost certainly heading back to where they came from. However, it’s an incredibly windy day and Colliery use the elements to race into a three goal lead within 25 minutes. I watch the first half from the far touchline. It might be windy, but at least it’s not raining. However, by half time I’ve had enough and spend half-time in the social club to warm up. Sadly, there’s no beer I like the look of so my money stays in my pocket.

Second half, I go in the covered stand. At least it acts as a windbreak as I watch Brighouse struggle to make use of the strong breeze being in their favour. Brighouse are never in it, and even concede a 4th on the break. The Colliery centre forward is simply too strong, and too good for a poor defence. The wind holds throughout and Brighouse bag a consolation in the last minute direct from a corner. They are slowly being sucked into a relegation battle that’s entirely of their own making based on this performance.

The Damage:
£10 ent
£2 prog
= £12

Pontefract Collieries 0-0 Belper Town, Tuesday 18th February 2025

Pontefract Collieries 0-0 Belper Town, Northern Premier League East, Hunters Stadium (Beechnut Lane), att. 206

Molly’s come into some money. Well, he hasn’t, but after 4 months of unemploy, he’s gone and got himself a job so is once again out from reclusiveness. So, yes, he’s up for Pontefract Colls, though he’s been before. ‘We can go to Golcar if you like’ I counter. No, he’s happy enough. No Nozzer tho, too sick to travel (I need a parental note) so it’s a 45 minute scoot, most of it M62. Tell you what – it’s easy to find this ground. Take the Pontefract turning, head towards town, and turn left after the racecourse (Beechnut Lane) and you’re there. Though Molly did say the first time he came, his satnav got lost and he ended up in some local housing estate.

I presume I’m first here and after parking up I walk back up Beechnut Lane for a pic of the...what do you call them? Welcoming boards? Anyway, one of them signs wot tells you the local football club is just down here and who and when their next game is against. Course, anyone not into football who’s driving into Ponty will just wonder what kind of lunatic you are, taking photos of signage.

The car park is vast, but I’m pleased I’ve put my boots on – it’s essentially a muddy field full of potholes. One can’t risk one’s new trainers at non-league venues, you never know when you’ll be traipsing through mud. The ground is now just over there, but in the darkness it’s not clear how to get to it. Turns out that darkness is a couple of other football pitches inbetween car park and ground.

Once at the turnstile, I receive a text from Moll. He’s already in. I pay my 9 quid and walk through what looks like a kitchen (but without the cooking implements). It’s one of the oddest entry arrangements I’ve ever seen, but at least they had a proper turnstile. Once through this building, you’re met with a snackbar and the clubhouse. And Moll (though possibly not every game for the latter). He’s still wearing the grin of relief that comes from being reacquainted with work (and money).

As you enter the perimeter of the pitch, there’s flat standing. We head left, past not one, but two seated stands adjoining each other. Apparently the seats are from Man City’s Maine Road ground, but now I think about it, can this be true? I’m sure the seats were dark blue. Anyway, I’m pleased to see the prevalence of whitewashed breezeblocks, a staple of the northern non-league scene. As is the mesh fencing which blocks our way when opened, to allow the players access to the field. Pride and joy though is the manually operated scoreboard, which remained unoperated today, neither side being tempted to score.

Opposite the main stand are the dugouts, and quite a few fans elect to stand here. The Colls’ main vocal support are stood behind the left hand goal 1st half, both these sides containing hard standing and enclosed by a fence. The other goal has a large propped roof, large enough for several steps of terracing, but demand there is none. Thus, it’s a cosy 1,200 capacity and with several local clubs nearby, I can see this place getting a decent crowd at some point. Pontefract isn’t a small place either.

It’s not a bad game, plenty of endeavour, etc, though we feel singled out by the home keeper as we stand by the perimeter, near the halfway line. One errant punt has us both scurrying for cover and Moll losing a portion of his beer. We were wise to him after that. Otherwise, Colls are unlucky with a cracking effort from the left winger, cutting inside and finding the top corner...but for keeper and post. Great save.

Half-time and a chance to have a warm in the clubhouse – I’m sure half the crowd are in here, and the other half could comfortably be accommodated. 6 beers on tap, Colls’ livery on the walls, a very tidy affair. Telly wasn’t working though. Maybe they were frightened folk would rather stay in the clubhouse for Bayern Munich – Celtic. Shame about the toilet block too, a grim affair. Nevermind the squeeze, it’s ok, I like not having paper towels or a hand dryer when I’ve just washed my hands in cold water in freezing outdoor temperatures. (Sarcasm.) But Moll does nab a half pound cheeseburger which looked good value (if you like cheese; I don’t.)

For Belper, third in the table, this was a chance to make up some ground on leaders Cleethorpes and Emley and early doors second half, they were at it. However, the Colls stood firm and, with the game heading towards goallessness, Moll took advantage of the bog and missed the game’s turning point: a Belper player took out a breaking Coll on the halfway line and received a red card. Fair play to the ref, who gave himself time to think about it, had a look at the damage done to the prone homester, before brandishing. I presume the stud marks were there for all to see.

Thereafter, midtable Colls became more adventurous, winning a succession of corners without ever looking like scoring and a rare Belper break brought a save from a one-on-one. All square, nils apiece...and I guess that means my visit doesn’t count. Oh well, it’s not too far away. Just remember to bring your walking boots.

The Damage:
£9 ent
£4.50 Beavertown Neck Oil (pint of)
= £13.50