FC Halifax Town 1-2 Chesterfield, Tuesday 24th May 2022

Halifax 1-2 Chesterfield, National League Play-off, Shay Stadium, att. 5,661

The National League play-offs and a final game of the season. A last chance to stand in traffic on the M62 and miss kick-off, a chance I took with both hands. Even then, getting off at Halifax, the two lanes soon halved due to more roadworks. A sign said lane closed in 600 yards, but rather than pull in and sit angrily as queue jumpers do what they do best, I sat in the soon to be closed lane (well, 600 yards later closed) and crawled along beside another car. I don’t think I’ve ever been car-horned like this before (by the wannabe queue-jumpers) but I rather enjoyed it. Even then, when the flash car immediately behind pulled in, he tried to ensure I couldn’t eventually pull in by being so close to the car in front (the one I’d crawled beside). Shame for him then that said car let me in, in front of him. (As an aside, I’ve read that traffic flows quicker if drivers do queue jump, but this sits uneasily with me, and, I hope, every other driver who pulls in when they see signs for a closed lane, only to be overtaken by queue-jumpers, who, I presume, haven’t read the same article as me on traffic management and are just being twunts.) Anyway, glad I got that off my chest.

Halifax. I can’t believe I’ve never been, to the ground or the place. It doesn’t help that they’ve been non-league since 2002. Seems like only yesterday they were perennial re-election favourites along with Darlington and Hartlepool. However, in 2008 they went bust and reformed as FC Halifax Town. This season sees their highest position since reforming, 4th place gaining them a place in the convoluted National League play-off system, where 4th plays 7th, 5th plays 6th, then the winners play away at 2nd or 3rd, with the winners playing the final. I’m not sure I agree with a system that gives promotion to a side in 7th, but Chesterfield grasp it with both hands, deservedly winning 2-1 on the night. They’ll now play 3rd placed Solihull Moors, away, for a chance to get beaten in the final by Wrexham or Grimsby (who progressed at Notts County last night with an injury time equaliser and 119th minute winner). Capiche?

Tonight’s game certainly attracted a crowd, over five and half thousand (Halifax’s average attendance this season: 2,130). Mind, it helped having 2,063 visitors, as well as sundry groundhoppers (I spotted 3 people I know). Shay Stadium (née ‘The Shay’) is quite smart these days too, a far cry from its tenure as a ramshackle speedway stadium. Two large (by modern English standards), covered terraces envelope either end, while a newish Main Stand also provides unencumbered views. The only stanchions are contained in the Skircoat Stand, the only remnant of the speedway days and now the seated area for away fans. This stand covers maybe two-thirds of the touchline, giving an overall stadium capacity of over 14,000.

Driving in, I passed The Shay, so at least I knew how far it was to walk. I eventually found somewhere to park the other side of the railway station, about 10 minutes away, so not too bad. I missed less of the game than I expected. Checking my wallet, I only had 20 quid, so lucky I raided the soap dish full of change in the car – it was £21 to get in. No programmes though. There never are by the time I arrive. The long queue at the turnstiles which I’d passed earlier had now disappeared and I was straight into the home terrace. Plenty of space, even given Halifax’s biggest crowd in an age.

Good atmosphere too, helped in part by the referee and a crackers 5 minute period around the half hour mark. 4 awful tackles, 3 yellow cards…and a home side baying for red. Later on, in the pub, Halifax fans mused on how the guy who scored the winning goal should have been sent off. Isn’t it strange how these things come back to bite you? The ref did his best though, and it was Chesterfield fans who were goading him with ‘You’re not fit to referee’ in the 2nd half, as they desperately clung on after Halifax pulled one back for 1-2. There were still 20 minutes left, but, in truth, the home side fell short. An excellent game for the neutral, I topped it off with a half at the Three Pigeons – Salt Jute session IPA. I wish I could have stayed for more, but I had another 2 hours’ drive in front of me. I can muse over what a season it’s been; the worst Barnsley FC season in my memory, only seeing 3 away games (thank god), visiting every Northern League ground at least once and ticking off Barrow and Harrogate in the league. And my dad passing away after 2 years of illness. Perhaps next season will be back to normal…whatever ‘normal’ is

The Damage:
£21 ent
£4 burger
= £25

The Tunes:
Jarvis (Jarvis Cocker)
The Voltarol Years (Half Man Half Biscuit)
Sometimes I Might Be Introvert (Little Simz)

BFC 1-2 Chesterfield, Saturday 9th April 2016

‘Linesman.  Yer can shove thi’ flag up thi’ arse’

Fri nite, Princess Louisa, Holborn.  Oddjob, no less.

Ever since our Wembley win I’ve been besieged by sniping comments from Londontykes past and present (mainly past) wondering how I could deal with positive.  How would I handle winning at Wembley? How would I cope with us getting promotion via the play-offs? How would I manage us being successful?  In a sentence: I don’t have to worry.  Yesterday, we well and truly ballsed it up.  We didn’t simply shoot ourselves in the foot, we went all Kurt Cobain.  If (when) we don’t make the play-offs, today was the day.  Suicide.  (As an aside, listen to Goldie Lookin’ Chain’s ‘Self Suicide’)

Committin' suicide to enhance my career

It worked for Mickey an' Tupac Shakir

Jesus was nailed up to some wood

2000 years later an' book sales are still good

I heard in a song suicide is painless
An' it's 80 percent sure to make you famous

Wankin' with a bag on yer head, tied to a door

That bloke from INXS, he knew the score

Like our play-off chances, Oakwell is over the hill (and far away).

They don’t make ‘em like that anymore.  Where was I?  Oh yes.  We have been beaten at home by a side in the bottom 6 with 10 men.  ‘But they only had 10 men for the last 10 minutes’ said a fellow traveller.  Yes, Chris was right – and it was one-all when JCR (the JCR!) got sent off at ones apiece.  We f***ed this up bigstyle.  No excuses.  Yes, the ref was s***, but he didn’t allow them to score 2 goals from 3 attacks (was it that many?) while their keeper had a blinder (and wasted time like a pro too).

Welcome to .....

We’d not long since equalised (our one bit of luck all day as Hamill’s 20 yarder looped over the keeper) when JCR went through Aidey White for a stone cold 2^nd yellow.  Stupid, given he’d been booked only a couple of minutes earlier (dissent?)  So that was him off and, presumably (hopefully) a continued siege on their goal. Actually, I worried Chesterfield would sit back and we would have our usual difficulty breaking down 10 men. Well, I was half right. Chesterfield broke up field, wide left. 3 (THREE) Reds stood off their left winger, allowed him to control the ball, turn, and run straight through them, getting a lucky deflection, but still, he earnt it….so he leaves those 3 behind, enters the box…where a defender (Roberts?) has to leave his man to close him down, leaving an easy pull back and tap-in.  The Ponty’s ‘You’re not singing anymore’ after Hamill’s effort is returned with interest from the away end.  Still 7 mins to go though.

The Corner Stand, from pitch level.

During those frantic last few minutes, we hit the post (Roberts), Hamill cut inside 3 or 4 of them and then his shot was cleared off the line…Winnall had one saved.  It wasn’t to be our day.  And while we had 2 decent penalty shouts (Selwood swears it was handball and those in the Ponty had the best view, as well as Toney being taken out at full pace) there was one refereeing decision which stood out for me. We were breaking from the halfway line, 3 on 3, when the ref blows.  I go apoplectic.  There’s no way it was a foul for us to win the ball.  Oh no, better than that.  He’s given the free kick to US and pulled play back cos their bloke is nursing a slight injury to his ankle.  No medical care needed, he got up, trotted back into position and we re-started with Chesterfield having 9 men behind the ball.  AND we had a Premiershit ref: Neil Swarbrick.  (He doesn’t seem to do that many games anymore; wonder why?)  

'Toby, Toby!'

The 1^st half was generally even, though Chesterfield had a header superbly saved by Davies and then missed the unmissable…3 yards out, generous low cross, I think he (Novak) fell over the ball.  Open goal.  Certainly the worst miss I’ve seen in a Reds game this season (including us).  Their fans were already celebrating as he missed.  I enjoyed that.  

Chesterfield did go ahead though 10 mins or so into the 2^nd half.  Hecky had dropped (rested?) George Williams at right back to give Bree a runout and, having been skinned twice in the 1^st half, a ball from his side is launched towards the back post where Novak gets inbetween Mawson and White to head it across Davies and in.  Think Oxford’s 1^st goal last week, but from the opposite side.  Oh well, we only have to score 2 now.

Looking toward the away end.

After a brief respite, we then threw the kitchen sink at them.  The keeper saved a powerful low shot from Toney; he saved superbly from a Winnall header (Hamill cross) at the back post; Isgrove had a shot deflected onto the post; Mawson headed a powerful effort over from a Roberts throw.  Other shots were blocked and, as I said, a couple of big penalty shouts were ignored.  This could easily have been 5 or 6….yet we lost, due to criminal defending, great goalkeeping, bad luck and poor refereeing.  Wembley (Mark II) may well be cancelled, but if we create as much as this in each game we could easily win what’s left of our matches.  

Panorama v Chesterfield

*** Roberts.  Won absolutely everything, inc. crucial interceptions.  Yes, he lumped the ball forward at times, but even that brought pressure with our forward 2.  Had to go off for 10 mins (stitches?) in the 1^st half.  Resolute.
** Winnall.  A tame effort at goal 1^st half, but otherwise coulda had a hatrick. Great movement, nice touches and did everything but score.  Shame, cos my line about ‘form is temporary, lack of class is permanent’ was made a little redundant, as he had a great game bar scoring.  Oh.
* Mawson.   The ying to Roberts’ yang.  How do we concede when one wins everything and the other manages to play the ball out of defence?  Twitter MOTM.

Londontykes MOTM:
*** Roberts
** Mawson
* Hamill / Winnall

Half time entertainment.  As good as it got.

Despatches:  The manager/interim 1^st team coach possibly f***ed up here, but for all the right reasons.  George Williams (Most Improved POTY?) was dropped (rested) for Bree to return.  He was easily beaten twice in the 1^st half, but no worries, he’ll still be around 2^nd half to concede 2 goals from his side.  The second goal was absolutely CRIMINAL and possibly only 33.3333333333333333333333% (recurring) Bree’s fault cos 3 of the f***ers let their bloke have the ball and simply stared at him while he ran into the box.  Lads, this is Sunday league stuff:  one go to him, he turns the other way, the 2^nd bloke takes it off him.  It works against Hamill and Hamill is a far far better player than their left winger.  Thereafter, everyone is all over the place as players try to cover one player, only to leave their own area free.  The knock-back, a tap-in.  ‘You’re not singing anymore’.  Indeed, we weren’t.  F***ing atrocious.  Hamill played well again.  Scored, whipped in balls.  Occasionally over elaborated and/or ran into 2 or 3 defenders at a time, but if he didn’t – he’d be in the Premiership.  Long live his mistakes. Without them, he wouldn’t be with us (in so many ways).  Brownhill won lots of the ball 1^st half before disappearing while Hourihane kept moves flowing but didn’t do much in the final third.  Fletcher was poor (why’s he so much better when he comes on as sub?) but it was nice to see Watkins return (even if he was one of the 3 for their winner).  Isgrove…well, you can write his match before it starts. Busy, creates nowt, scores less.  And Davies was sound, save for 2 goals he could do little about.  

The Pukka Pies East Stand.

Drink du jour: vodka and orange.  Dave misunderstood how to buy alcohol in Sainsburys though and had to piggyback our vodka.  Hence I’m not as trashed as I might normally have been.

Away: a thousand and odd.  I thought there were more.  While I thought we WOULD bring more.  Must be easier getting to Wembley than Oakwell.  (Are there more Londontykes than Barnsleytykes?)
Come on you Reds!  Win the last half a dozen games and…we won’t finish any lower than we are now.  I never wanted to go to Wembley twice in a season anyway.  Honest.

The Damage:
22 travel
5 mug (present)
3 prog

The Ponty.

Pre-match on Grove Street.

Barnsley 1-1 Chesterfield, Saturday 11th April 2015

‘It were not sensical'

The teams about to enter the Theatre of Screams (cheers, Andy)

The dream is over, if not mathematically.  Needing 5 wins from the last 5 games (and more) we fail at the first hurdle, only drawing to the side holding 6th, Chesterfield.  And fair play to them - I thought they outclassed us 1st half and took a deserved lead.  Furthermore, whilst the only difference between the teams at the New Saltergate (whatever it's called) was the class of star centre forward Eoin Doyle (now sold) they looked very much like a team on the up without him.  Note, a TEAM.

Don't be fooled by the sun. It was cold (see hat).

After nearly scoring twice in the opening 2 minutes (the first from Waring losing it cheaply) the match settled down and was predominantly played in our half.  Then a player got a head injury and I nipped off for pie and pee...and whilst zipping myself heard a small cheer.  Those toilets are well soundproofed, but the PA confirmed it.  'And the first goal for Chesterfield...'  Christ.  I was probably pleased not to have seen it, when it was later described to me:  Hourihane slipping over in possession and one pass later they're clean through to bury it to Davies' far corner.  Bl**dy Hourihane. I'd have probably exploded.  At least he's finally made a difference!

'Condiments station'.  WTF?

Yet before the half was over, we somehow nearly scored twice without ever creating owt.  Crainie hit the bar with a looping header.  Everyone stood and stared...until it hit the bar.  Anticipation?  That's for other teams.  Then as the half closed, the keeper pulled off a save from Waring, who was given a free shot on the backpost.  Was he 3 yards out or 4?  Should the keeper have even had a chance?  No, it was poor.  Waring had the whole goal to aim at, 3 yards out, and he's hit the spot just above the keeper's header, giving him the chance of making the save.

Second half and not much changes, so Johnson asks me who he should take off.  'Well...Hourihane and Waring for a start'. He does.  Hourihane being dragged off is the 2nd biggest cheer of the day after our goal.  Ibehre comes on, and finally we have a forward who can move, hold a ball up and win headers...or if not, win throw ins.  It takes us 4 minutes to equalise.  Their guy goes straight through Ibehre, the free kick is lumped up and the Spireites fail to clear.  And from the 2nd phase (I hate that phrase) the ball is crossed in from the right, there's a little flick on and the  header is latched onto by Winnall, sliding in on the backpost.  Offside? I would say so, but I don't think the officials spotted the flick-on.

Tremendous turnout from the Spireites.

Sadly, the charge of the red brigade doesn't come.  The ball is mostly in their half, but the only chance comes Winnall's way. If he sees it again he'll kick himself, as he's on his own and he takes the ball back on himself before meekly shooting with his left.  If he'd controlled it the other way, he'd have been clean through 10 yards out.  Oh well.

One more (small) highlight for me, the manager finally takes Declan John off, so the 3 changes I'd have made before KO finally come to fruition.

*** Scowen.  1st half, he was everywhere.  Tackles, makes passes, drives at people, covers. 

** Nyatanga.  Twitter MOTM.  Marshalled the defence very well, always looked cool under pressure.

* Crainie. Competant display at right back, as well as playing a part in the goal...and hitting the bar.

Londontykes top 3:
1. Nyatanga
2. Scowen
3. Crainie

The new right winger - an improvement on that Stewart bloke from Ipswich.

Despatches:
6 matches without a win and counting. Not Berry's fault, as he came on, looked enterprising (ie, better than Hourihane) and drilled a 25 yarder the keeper was pleased to hold.  Pearson always chose the sideways or backwards option.  I could understand that against the Blunts, we couldn't keep possession, but not this week.  Ramage made a welcome return. He's one loanee I'd keep (wages permitting).  Declan John is one I wouldn't (so we will). Constantly threatened to deceive, but usually lost it.  Smith recovered after a shaky start (note to John again: it's YOUR job to ensure the opposition don't double up on the left back;  you should KNOW THIS cos it's where you've been playing the last few matches.  Indeed, John DID chase back once...when I f***ing screamed at him to do so. He ended up winning us a goalkick.)  Smith delivered some good crosses and played some good one-twos with John 2nd half.  Waring couldn't hold a ball, and when he did, promptly misplaced the pass.  There was one in the 2nd half, we were breaking in numbers, he held it up superbly...before playing the ball behind our onrushing player for a throw-in.  He's crap.  His mate Winnall ran around enthusiastically in midfield 1st half.  Would he have been standing where he was when he scored if Waring was still on the pitch?  We'll never know.  Was he given licence to get into their box once the subs were made?  Otherwise, he fell over alot and moaned about it.  As usual.  Ibehre looked the pick of the strikers.  Lalkovic was poor. What's happened to him?  As for Davies, 2 early saves and then not much to do.

Drink du jour:  Vodka and orange

Crowd: 11,268 (away 2,459)

Less than 9,000 home fans.  And it showed.

Chesterfield 2-1 Barnsley, Saturday 22nd November 2014

‘Ah’m a bit funny wi’ Christmas dinner in a pasty.’

Get ready - Barnsley are coming!

After 3 wins, 9 goals scored and me seeing none of it, normal service was resumed yesterday as we slipped to defeat against Chesterfield.  Excellent backing from the away end(s), a decent performance (Cole missing a one-on-one, a header cleared off the line) but in the end we were done by a couple of marvellous finishes from a player who won’t be at this level next season.  Or even from January.  I’m sure Danny Wilson told his players to mind Eoin Doyle, top scorer in the division by a country mile, but what can you do with goals like he notched yesterday?  The 1^st was a sublime finish as he ran onto a long ball down the channel and lobbed Turnbull, caught forlornly in no-man’s land.  1-0 at HT.  Then his second, he cut inside, left our defence for dead buried it into the far corner.  He’s a class act and no mistake.  Irritatingly, we’d been completely on top in that first 10 mins or so, 2^nd half, so it was completely against the run of play.

Nice car.  Nice spire.

As ever, apart from the goals, there was nothing in it.  (That sounds like something Alan Shearer would say on MOTD).  Arguably, we looked the better team. As long as we didn’t let Doyle have the ball, we’d be fine.  We had (half) chances.  Cole dallied a little too long as the keeper sprinted out and blocked, while a header destined for the top corner was cleared off the line.  Bugger.  Still, there was time for a quick break down the left and with yellow shirts (why?) piling into the box, the ball fell to Treacy who couldn’t really miss.  That gave us 9 mins (including injury time) to scrape an equaliser and though camped in their half, we never really threatened.  Overall, a positive performance but one man made all the difference – and he didn’t play for us.

Welcome to the Proact

*** Difficult.  No-one really stood out.  (Well, apart from Crainie, who was beaten more than once down his wing).  I’ll go Dudgeon.  I thought he was solid and often ran past his own man to support attacks.  They didn’t give him the ball of course, but there it is.

** Nyatanga.  Ramage looked a little shaky and Lewin was usually on the cover.

* Hourihane.  Just because.

Despatches:
Andy helped ensure the day was not without stress, by forgetting our Two Together railcard.  On the way up, the ticket woman said she’d have billed us were it not for her not having her ticket machine (what was the point in checking tickets, then?)  At Chesterfield railway station, we enquired about return tickets.  No reduction on the ones we’d bought, that’ll be £71.50 each please. No ta – we’ll risk it on the way back. (It was due to be £80 on the train.)  On the way back, got on train…to find some Brummie Bluenose numpties coming back from Rovrum not being too keen to move out of our seats.  I must have been a little tipsy, cos I insisted.  But they were our saviours really, cos when the ticket inspector came, he looked at a couple of their tickets then moved on, presuming we were all one group.  Phew. 

The game: They scored 2 out of 3 shots on target, we got 1 in 5.  While Cole occasionally looked dangerous, I only ever noticed Winnall when he was failing to hold a ball up.  I’m not sure this 3 up front thing is a successful tactic (4 at one point in the 2^nd half).

Saw Reds’ legend Kempy in the toilets at half time.  ‘That’s three fifty tha’ owes mi’ as he berated a mate, with a suspicious pool of (alcoholic?) liquid spilt all over the floor.  Careless.

And good backing from the away fans today, proving it makes absolutely FA difference in terms of the result.  We sold out the away end and they gave us another 400 tickets in the East Stand….hence chants of ‘East Stand East Stand give us a song’!  Was a bit disappointed it took less than minute for ‘Chesterfield’s a sh*thole, I wanna go home’.  Go on then – f*** off home.

And hopefully Hicksy will provide us with a run down of the sponsored walk from Barnsley to Chesterfield, cos rumour has it he had to drop out.  Do sponsors get reimbursed, I wonder???  We ourselves had a decent walk to and from the ground, 20 minutes or so each way.  Easy ground to find though – simply walk down Sheffield Road from the town centre.

The Proact - perfectly designed for flagbearers

Drink du jour: Went to CAMRA pub the Rutland pre and post match.  The Hoegaarden was off, so Stella promoted herself to the starting grid, while the bitter drinkers entered into Chesham’s finest, Redtail.  Then, feeling like a change, Bacardi (and coke) made what was possibly its season’s debut on the train.  Not sure the family me and Reedy met in the Betjeman Arms appreciated me telling them we were wondering what their relationships were….but it’s not my fault if your daughter chooses to go out with someone who looks like it could be her brother.  And no, that’s not dad’s new (younger) girlfriend, that’s his daughter.  They’re just a very touchy-feely family.  (ManUre fans from….Surrey)

Oh, and I didn’t fall asleep on the bus.  It was the couch this time, watching The Championship.

The sun begins to set on Barnsley's chances...

Away: 2433. 

Damage:
train: £25
match: £22
programme: nowhere to be seen