I always thought Annfield Plain were old members of the Northern League, so always planned a visit. Ther slightest of research suggests not. Erstwhile members of the Wearside League (these days a feeder to the Northern) but earlier a member of the North-Eastern League, which had some of the north east’s bigger non-league sides, as well as the reserve teams of the local Football League sides. Indeed, in 1947, Annfield even applied for Football League admittance. This I cannot believe.
The ground is a gem, once my satnav found its way through a residential estate to find it. Up a potholed track, there was a sizable car park. Indeed, given it’s a 6:45pm kick-off (no floodlights) I even beat 1 or 2 players as I arrive at half-six. There’s another car park inside the club gates. I guess the rest of the players have parked up early.
The entrance is brick, the same brick that makes up countless terraces in former mining communities such as Annfield. There’s 5 doors. If they’re all turnstiles, it’s a tad ambitious by today’s standards. Tonite there is only one open, and I’m pleased to see an actual turnstile. An old codger welcomes me, takes my money and asks me if I know where everything is. ‘I haven’t a clue’ I reply, and he’s more than happy to tell me where the stand is, where the refreshment room is, wjere the toilets are. Love it! (Later, as he headed toward the net at full-time – he was the one climbing a ladder to take them down – he tells me he’s 75. Good on him, he’s a credit to the club and a credit to the village.)
I’m hungry, so I try to follow his directions at the back of the stand. I timidly open a door and find I’m in the right place, a room the size of some people’s dining rooms, with a small counter and a pile of used paint tins in the corner. I have a tea and a Snickers. I thought £1.50 was cheap but the Snickers is TINY. Is that really the size of them these days? Mustn’t grumble though. I’m trying to lose weight.
Derwent Park is GEM. Three sides have grass banking, thereby ensuring a good view wherever. One and a half sides have a corrugated fence which leans over at the top, enough to shield you from the elements (as long as those elements don’t bring the whole thing down). Behind the dugouts on the far side is a former brick building of some description, an unused toilet block perhaps. Then there’s the Main (only) stand side, the Marshall Lawson Stand. Marshall Lawson is the club’s oldest ever player, once turning out at 66 in a game v Marske (as club secretary he was desperate for the club to fulfil its fixtures, though his debut was at 17).
The Marshall Lawson Stand is some construction. 4 small rows of seats, covered by a barely sloping corrugated roof on stilts. ‘I have LITERALLY got a shed as big as that’ messaged a mate. It sits one side of the halfway line and the players come out of an adjacent tunnel which leads into the building behind, containing changing rooms, snack bar and toilets. Later, presuming the toilet was in the same corridor as the changing rooms, I entered via the tunnel only to find myself in a changing room. I beat a hasty retreat.
The other side of the tunnel is 6 or 7 uneven steps of terracing, sadly now fenced off. Decrepit it may be, but I’d have thought a consenting adult might just about manage not to do damage to themself by standing there. Some of it was a bit loose, mind you. At the far end a couple of kids hung off a tree behind the goal but outside the stadium itself. Perhaps they’re the same kids later trying to climb another tree, as the ball nestled in its upper reaches. ‘Can I have your shirt after the game?’ one shouted to the keeper. I think both kids (and their friends) could’ve fitted in it. The Annfield keeper made the game for me.
Corinthians go ahead from a penalty. The defender has gone straight through the back of the player before making contact with the ball. Over an hour later I can still hear the keeper moaning ‘it was never a penalty.’ Upon the decision having been made, the keeper holds onto the ball, before the ref eventually tells him to part with it, so he nonchalantly kicks it past the taker. The (young) ref obviously doesn’t want to yellow card him, so lets it go. 0-1.
Second half, the keeper has an early spat with the Corinthians’ physio, who has had the temerity to walk behind his net. He stares him out before giving him verbals. Weird. (There’s a game on at the other end.) Then the keeper spills an easy cross for a tap-in. 0-2. ‘Fuckin’ Elvis Costello in goal’ the physio creases himself, though I don’t get the reference. Isn’t Elvis Costello a singer? A singer who looks nothing like the Annfield keeper. Is it a comedic reference to Abbot and Costello? Was Costello’s forename ‘Elvis’?
Half-time does nothing to calm this keeper down. After criticism from a teammate, he’s like ‘and what the f*** are you doing?’ and ‘there’s no point in booting it up, it comes straight back’ (he may have a point there). Then he safely catches a throughball, but the centre forward crashes into him. He’s up, obviously wanting a fight, but the forward, possibly realising size and anger are not on his side, collapses, holding his face. He must be mistaking the Wearside League for the Premiership. There are calls for the player to be sent off (‘that’s 2 yellows referee, one for the foul, one for the rolling around’). I get that, but by my reckoning, the keeper should be on 4 yellows by now. After consultation with the linesman (which seems to be this ref’s get-out clause) a pair of yellows are brandished to the keeper and centre forward. A sensible resolution.
Corinthians nick a late 3rd, a crashing finish from 20 yards. More comments from the keeper, and one or two locals complain about the ref (their ire not helped by a disallowed goal in 1st half injury time, but mainly now at what they see as inconsistency in how the ref is treating injured players). Personally, I thought the ref had a decent game and did his best to keep 22 players on the pitch. There were some feisty challenges, one player carried off and another limped off. But all’s fair in love and football. It’s handshakes all round at the final whistle, in the dusky gloom of north County Durham.
The Damage:
£3 ent
£1.50 tea and Snickers
= £4.50
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