Geordie Al's Groundhopper Scrapbook: Bristol Rovers 1-1 Scunthorpe United, Saturday 24th February 2018

Sunday 25 February 2018

Bristol Rovers 1-1 Scunthorpe United, Saturday 24th February 2018

Bristol Rovers 1-1 Scunthorpe United (att. 8,346)

Welcome to ....

I love this stadium! Whilst the Memorial Ground, Bristol, is #90 of the 92, the wait was well worthwhile. What a crazy ground! A former rugby ground (the gates are still emblazoned ‘Bristol Rugby’) it has more stands than any I’ve seen since the demise of the Manor Ground, Oxford. How ironic that Oxford United these days play in a 3-sided stadium.

The Optimum Drywall Systems Stand. Probably.

The Memorial is a belter. I got a bus up the Gloucester Road from the city centre (#70 something) and you enter through the gates into the stadium compound, behind the North Stand. Ticket offices right in front, a handy price list for each part of the stadium, bang on. But no, I can’t have a seat in the East or West Stands, sold out. That’s ok. Rovers have several terraces. Do I go behind the goal with the hardcore, beside the East Stand…or maybe go in the away end. No, not the latter. I’m sure I read you can’t get a beer in the away end, and, for once, I may fancy one, since pre-match was spent wandering around shops (shops!) looking for a birthday present or 3. There can’t be many of us here today with a flower-pressing kit in one’s bag.

Take yer pick. But why are away fans charged more to stand?

Luckily, I didn’t choose a ticket on the West terrace either. This was a family stand, and without any kids in tow, a single gentleman of a certain age may leave himself open to interpretation. East Terrace it was. Plenty of space (hardly a sellout on the terraces, though busy enough). Also, my 1st ever experience of a flat white in a football stadium. I’d been craving one for a couple of hours, though I wasn’t prepared to lower my stance by infiltrating a passing Starbucks. £3 or the price of an 88 page programme. Twas nice tho. Just the thing to wash down a Cornish pasty.

The East Stand towers.

Half time came, save for watching 45 minutes of men trying to control a ball on a bobbly pitch. The rugger buggers may have left, but the pitch still played otherwise. The grass looked barely cut, there were marks all over and the ball bounced at funny angles. Did the groundsman not get the note about it being football this week? (Before I have his family on my case, it could well be two things; Rovers may have requested a dreadful pitch in an effort to give themselves a chance against a far better footballing side in Scunny, or little can be done, a la Newport’s mudbath.)

The teams line up in front of the West Stand.

I went for a wander. I wondered why no-one had a beer and I presumed it was cos our terrace was in view of the pitch. But no, sneak behind the East Stand and a small doorway leads into their social club. Ahhh, bliss, on a chilly day. Half a cider and scores on the telly (the Super Reds are winning two-nil at Brum). I know, I should have had a pint, but I was pushed for time as I’d just had a cheeky climb up the East Stand to check out the view (amazing – inc. most of Bristol!) and had a chat with the steward about why the rugby team now plays at Ashton Gate. I bet their fans aren’t impressed, swapping the homely and characterful Memorial for whatever Ashton Gate purports to be these days. Certainly neither characterful nor homely.

The South Stand (with County Cricket club floodlights behind).

The East Stand is a tall affair which dominates the stadium, despite being only spanning around half of each side of the pitch. Opposite, is a smart modern stand with a terraced paddock, a ‘shelf’ of seats and executive facilities upstairs. I understand why folk think it looks more in place at rugby or cricket, the small arch and underhanging TV gantry giving it an unusual look. Again, this stand doesn’t reach much more than half the pitch and what surely is a temporary stand has been tacked on at the southern end, with the covered family terrace flanking the other side. The South Stand is a small stand with a propped roof which manages to look like a circus tent, coloured in the blue and white stripes of Rovers. Seated away fans share this stand and on rainier days this might be a good idea, as those stood in the open on the southern side of the East Stand leave themselves at the mercy of the elements. Finally, there’s the Thatcher’s (Cider) North Terrace, which, although sizeable in modern parlance, was a good way from the goalline, to allow for Rovers’ conversions following their tries.

The Family Enclosure...a ballboy waits.

Anyway, due to only having a half, I was out in time to see kick off. And what’s this? I’d forgotten all about Scunny having a Barnsley loanee, Cameron McGeehan, in their squad. Bought for a sizeable wad from Luton and now usually warming the bench for Scunthorpe, today he was getting a starting run. Only it took me 45 mins to realise. So, with my beady eye I discerned one perfect throughball (wasted), one intercepted throughball and a wildly sliced shot. Then he was taken off. Presumably this was to protect Scunny’s lead, a scuffed shot from an incisive ball down the left putting them ahead after an hour.

The North Terrace

It didn’t work. The away side, despite being the better team, backed off, and in injury time, a low cross was put in from the right and a defender gets his leg to it thereby inadvertently killing the ball perfectly for Rovers to lash in from close range. A suitably poor goal befitting of this match. If you can, check out the highlights on youtube – even the highlights show how bad this game was. Worth coming to see the stadium, not worth coming to see the football.

The Scunny terrace (227 travellers).

And then a pootle down Gloucester Road. No rush this time, and I walked most of the way back, via a couple of pubs. And although I did enjoy seeing England struggle in the old egg-chasing against 3rd world rugger nation Scotland, there’s only so much I can take of a pub full of interested specimens (even if they did have Leffe on tap). Most pubs were busy, it being 6 Nations and all, but then I found a quiet bar. ‘You not showing rugby?’ ‘No.’ ‘Good.’

Full time.

The Damage:
£18 Ent
£3.50 Cornish pasty
£1.90 Thatcher’s Gold cider (half)
£3 prog
£16.56 travel (Megabus: bargain!)
= £42.96

The Tunes:
Stay Gold (First Aid Kit)
Pure, Impure (Seefeel)
Quique (Seefeel)
Behind the Counter with Max Richter (Various)
Man Alive (Everything Everything)
Prince of Tears (Prince of Tears)
Utopia (Bjork)
Singles 1993-2003 (Chemical Brothers)
Slowdive (Slowdive)
Silver or Lead (Ursula Rucker)