Mind, I nearly never got there. With the A1 knocked out due to an accident, a 90 minute drive took me nearly 4 hours. Good job I set off early, and I was still able to have a drink with Molly and Darrel in Heaven and Ale, followed by pie and peas and a drizzle of mint sauce from the Oakwell Sandwich Shop. It’s important to start with the highlights.
The other highlight, of course, was a late winner, leading to the bizarre sight of a pitch invasion by a 10 year old. As said kid is lead off by stewards, a row breaks out in the old Main Stand paddock from whence he came. If you haven’t seen the story, 2 stewards end up in hospital and another couple are treated at the scene. Higher casualty figures than when we play Washday or Dirty Leeds. But it does bode one safeguarding question…can you throw a child out of a football ground? What happens if something happens to him outside? Equally, as BFC are threatening to ban the parent, I’d be straight on to the missus (‘Can you say you took him, cos then you get barred, not me?’)…anyway, I said last night was history repeating itself, even down to the casual misogyny that presumes it’s dad who takes junior to Oakwell…
Yes, we WON!!!! Which didn’t occur the other day. It was all happening. After their soft penalty, Norwood goes down in instalments (even his dives are done in slow-mo) and the ref….’it’s like de ja vous all over again’ (sorry, I’m contractually bound to mention my favourite Shaka Hislop quote of all time at least once a season)….decides, as a sop to everyone, that it’s a corner. Listen, bud, it’s a penalty or a goalkick. But I’ll help you – it’s a goal kick. Manager ‘Super’ Michael Duffy obviously agrees with the one-eyed Ponty End and gets himself sent off for his troubles. It’s one-all, time is running out, and we are DESPERATE. So, who better to step up than no-sung hero Jason Cundy, with a banging header from Connell’s outswinger. YOU BEAUTY.
I said we’d been in total control, earlier. Indeed, once Norwood opened the scoring, you couldn’t see any other result. 1-0 to Barnsley. Great finish too, as Kitching had the vision to play a neat ball left, inside the penalty area and Norwood turned and hammered it high into the net from an angle. (I’d be disappointed if I was the keeper who conceded from there though.) From here, like Stanley on Boxing Day, there’s no way back from this. BUT THERE IS! Never, NEVER rule out a w*nker in black luminous yellow finding a penalty from nothing for the opposition. The ball is played through and Mads glances at their player before lifting his arms to avoid contact. The player deliberately runs across Mads and trips. He is running away from goal. There is simply nothing in it for Mads to commit this foul. The same opponent gets up and despatches the pen.
That was all second half. The opening half was us dissecting them and our comedy forward line failing to bag. ‘Norwood was everywhere’ someone said. If he was, he was getting there 10 mins after everyone else. In attack, he was often left behind as 4 other teammates overtook him. To his credit though, he delivered 2 absolute peaches into the box (think Harry Kane, the way he whips in crosses that Harry Kane would want). One of these unfortunately falls to Devante Cole, who studs the ball to the keeper from 4 yards. Where’s Super Sammy Winnall when you need him!? Apart from that, all our ‘class’ brought was a poor 20 yard effort from Kane (Herbie) which went wide.
Onwards and upwards!
*** Mads. A colossus. Won everything, up high or down low.
** Connell. Doesn’t just win it and tap it to another player, capable of a long pass too.
* Kitching. Like Mads, intercepted a couple of potentially defence splitting passes, as well as getting up in attack.
Official MOTM: Was it Connell?
Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. Norwood 2. Andersen 3. Kitching
Despatches:
Cole got the hook to give our 17 year old Portuguese midget a run out and it worked – Jalo ran about and was a general pest (though his little legs made no inroads on an opposition player striding out). Still, he took one for the team by disrupting a counter attack at the cost of a yellow. Maybe he has the making of a professional yet. Collins’ timewasting began in the 71st minute this week, as he held onto it for 20 seconds. Funnily enough, he was a bit quicker once they equalised. I was a bit quicker late on too, getting home in an hour and a half. Special mention to Norwood too, for completing 90 minutes. COYR!
Drink du jour: CLWB Tropica at Heaven and Ale.
Away: 222. Unusually, their vocal element didn’t huddle at the back like every other team, they were in the middle of the stand, by the exit (sensible).
Today’s take home: R.I.P. Pele. (Tenuous Reds’ link….we played Pele’s old team Santos in a friendly, Premiership season.)
The Damage:
£29 travel (petrol)
= £29
The Tunes:
The Line is a Curve (Kae Tempest)
Muzik Slam Mix (Soma)
BBC 6Music
BBC5Live
BBC Radio 4
Paint the Sky with Stars – The Best of Enya (Enya)
Best of Chas ‘n’ Dave (Chas ‘n’ Dave)*
*a recent charity shop purchase. Unbearable, had to turn it off after 5 tracks.
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