'Never look a gift horse ......'
Another week, another home defeat, as Brum (one win in seven) come to Oakwell, get played off the park and come and away winning 1-2. Once again we see the old adage. If good teams win while playing poorly, QED, poor teams play well and lose. A quick look at my fixture list confirms this is the 5th successive home defeat I have seen. Can things get any worse?
As I said, we controlled the game - yet not enough to avoid the constant corners and freekicks we gave away, giving them their only chances to score - and boy, did they take them! Debate raged as to whose fault the 1st was, a near post header by Curtis Davies from an inswinging corner. Some blamed Steele, who attempted to come but what was never gonna get there. Others (like me) blamed the defence, who simply cannot outjump anyone with any height. Steele cannot move until he sees where the ball is going, cos he has to be worried about the 6'8" Zigic. And to be fair to Brum, they obviously use Zigic as a decoy quite often, given how many goals Davies has got for them this season (note to Keith Hill: Do your homework!). All season we have been crying out for a commanding centre half. A Shackell...a Tiler...a McCarthy....an Adie Moses even. We have any amount of centre halves who would be good enough to PARTNER a decent centre half, but not one of them who can be our No. 1. Or Number 6. Anyway...
Just as we all worry we have seen this all before - another away team take the lead and will then attempt to timewaste their way to victory - we hit back within a couple of minutes, as a goalmouth scramble ends with Greening banging the ball in from the edge of the box. Quality finish.
2nd half, we have an early chance to go ahead. Tudgay and Dagnall are 2-on-1 and Tudgay threads the ball through for a normal sized legged centre forward. Unfortunately, despite being at Oakwell for a month (seems like a year!) he hasn't yet realised how small Chris Dagnall is, and the ball is stabbed wide as Dagnall stretches. But it gets worse. Dagnall is later subbed (Dear Keith: please keep Dagnall on, cos even if he doesn't score, whoever he plays with gets the benefit. Instead, try taking Tudgay off, cos he barely moves and it's starting to annoy me). Where was I? Oh yes, a header hits a Birmingham arm, the crowd shout hopefully for a penalty and the ref actually gives it! We are UP AND RUNNING. Victory is ours! O'Brien has the ball in his hands and who wouldn't trust Big Jim on his recent form? Thankfully tho, our top scorer Craaaaaaig Davies has just come on, and without having had a touch of the ball, thinks he can simply bang it past England reserve keeper Butland. Which is what he does - only about 6 yards too high. You f***ing clutz.
Not to worry, there'll be another goal soon, and so it proves. Dawson gives away a needless free kick from a decent crossing position. The ball is yet again whipped into the danger zone (the area between the keeper and our defence) and everyone watches Curtis Davies wander in to bullet another header into our net. Appalling free kick to give away, but we keep on doing it. Why, against a team who have only looked dangerous from crosses, do we give them the chance to put in...crosses? I am gobsmacked. I was given a new t-shirt for Xmas, by the way, emblazoned with the slogan 'Football is a game you play with your brain'. I must order a job lot for the squad at Oakwell.
*** Perkins. Amazingly taken off by Hill. Least, it would be amazing, had we not seen Hill take off our best player in previous games too (the likes of Dawson, while Mellis gets his usual 90 minutes). The crowd let Hill know this time, booing loudly. Later on, when the sponsors name Perkins as MOTM, it's the loudest cheer since our goal. Hill, take note.
** Golbourne. Again, didn't put a foot wrong. Improves as the season goes on, despite his complete lack of a right foot. Even managed the odd decent cross today.
* Stones. Solid in defence, a threat going forward.
Despatches: 824 Brum fans? Really? Looked about 400. Sounded like a dozen. Must be the quietest, most fickle bunch in the land. I guess Birmingham is only a tiny little place...
Onwards and upwards!
Monday, 31 December 2012
Barnsley 1-3 Blackburn Rovers, Saturday 29th December 2012 (Keith Hill R.I.P.)
So, tis the end of an(other) era. Farewell Keith - and Good Luck.
Of course, if yer gonna get sacked, best to go out with a whimper. Losing at home to a side who've lost 5 in 6, are completely rudderless and the subject of a radio 5 phone-in - Is there a bigger laughing stock in football at the moment than Blackburn Rovers? (Insert club of your choice who play at Oakwell HERE).
And so it was that we found out exactly whose fault the Boxing Day Brum defeat was: Dagnall, Stones and Sir Bobby of Hassell. Replaced by Davies (hapless), Foster (hopeless) and Wiseman (hilarious). Sounds like a modern day re-working of the 7 dwarves, but without the laughs. Oh, and Done in for Greening. Clueless.
0-1: a ball over the top sees Foster actually RUN AWAY from his man to mark someone else. Said bloke cannot believe he's been given a free run at goal and runs in, shoots, Steele saves the one-on-one, it comes back to him...hits him?...and dribbles towards goal where Golbourne doesn't even consider using his right foot to clear it off the line and it crawls in. Christ on a bike.
0-2: O'Brien chases back 30 yards to make a great challenge on the halfway line. Sadly, he then gets done (small 'd') and is left the wrong side, as their bloke strolls out with the ball. Ball gets played out to their left wing where, somehow, their bloke only has Wiseman to beat. Without even a shimmy, he leaves Wiseman for dead then drives a shot straight through Steele on the near post. Appalling. But it does give what, in hindsight, was Keith Hill's death rattle - Wiseman being booed every time he touched the ball. I wish the half could have gone on for longer, cos I was starting to enjoy that.
Half time comes and he takes Wiseman (and Done) off. And if I read it right, the reason why he dropped Stones for Wiseman in the first place was 'to take Stones out of the firing line'. Ho bloody ho. Are we Reds fans REALLY famous for hammering our homegrown stars with ability who are actually trying to DO SOMETHING? Don't answer that.
Anyone who wasn't there already knows the tale of our season by now - we've played relatively well, controlled the game, and find ourselves losing. But I'm hopeful - despite not scoring 2 goals in a home game ALL SEASON, I tell my dad we'll score 3 in a half to record a famous victory. OUR SEASON STARTS HERE. Well, I was half right!
Despite not creating owt, 2nd half, we pull one back when Redfear...sorry, Dawson, drives past a couple of players and into the box and then hammers a left footer into the top right hand corner from just inside the box. Fans cheer but there's no conviction. Were they worried the comeback was ON and Keith Hill would remain IN? Unfortunately, the comeback is probably over once Tudgay goes in for a header and crashes into the keeper. He's completely laid out and the ensuing delay brings 9 minutes of proper 'injury' time. Presuming it's the end of his stay at Oakwell, and I DO hope he's recovered, but I couldn't help but think 'excellent, perhaps we can get him off our wage bill now as well, bloody waste of space'. And this was one of his GOOD games!
We continue to take the game to Rovers, but are stretched, what with having only ten men and all (hang on - haven't we played with 10 men the entire time Tudgay's been here???). Consequently, we all get to see who you DON'T want to see try to defend against Jordan Rhodes, one-on-one, despite being at the ball 1st. Why, it's Super Jim McNulty! That bloke who used to be a defender for us, but this season has collapsed into a wallowing mass of panicky jelly, with delusions of Beckenbaueresque grandeur. Ball bounces awkwardly, McNulty heads ball up in air, cedes possession to Rhodes (use your STRENGTH for chrissakes and stop s***ing yourself!!!!) who knocks it past him and fires home.
*** Dawson. There is only one player on the park. So it goes without saying he doesn't get MOTM.
** O'Brien. Constant endeavour from central-mid. Sponsors MOTM.
* Stones. Can't be hard to look good tho when you're replacing Scott Wiseman.
Despatches:
Noble-Lazarus came on and looked dangerous (until he shot - 2 high wide and not very handsome) and Sinclair looked alright. Or are these things relative?
Aside from the booing of Wiseman, my other Favourite Thing was when McNulty strolled forward with the ball, looked left, looked right, looked ahead, then got tackled and jumped up berating anyone and everyone while they counter-attacked. Dangerous Brian O'Callaghan's entire BFC career probably only involved being done like this 3 times, yet McNulty loses it EVERY match in this way, at least once.
Bottom of the table, there is only one way to go now - ONWARDS AND UPWARDS! Discussion on the train (drink du jour: Smirnoff vodka and coca-cola - the real thing) included me wondering when, or if, Barnsley FC have EVER finished bottom of the table before . Certainly not in my lifetime! A text from Official Barnsley Trainspotter P. Waddington comes up with the answer: 1963/64 or summat. Could this be the 1st Reds side in nearly 50 years to come rock bottom? We're already on our longest run of home games without a win since 1952-53 (thanks to the Chronicle for that). Still, there is hope. If Roy Castle is right, and if we want to beat any records, then 'dedication's what you need'. Another thing we don't have.
Keith Hill, R.I.P.
Of course, if yer gonna get sacked, best to go out with a whimper. Losing at home to a side who've lost 5 in 6, are completely rudderless and the subject of a radio 5 phone-in - Is there a bigger laughing stock in football at the moment than Blackburn Rovers? (Insert club of your choice who play at Oakwell HERE).
And so it was that we found out exactly whose fault the Boxing Day Brum defeat was: Dagnall, Stones and Sir Bobby of Hassell. Replaced by Davies (hapless), Foster (hopeless) and Wiseman (hilarious). Sounds like a modern day re-working of the 7 dwarves, but without the laughs. Oh, and Done in for Greening. Clueless.
0-1: a ball over the top sees Foster actually RUN AWAY from his man to mark someone else. Said bloke cannot believe he's been given a free run at goal and runs in, shoots, Steele saves the one-on-one, it comes back to him...hits him?...and dribbles towards goal where Golbourne doesn't even consider using his right foot to clear it off the line and it crawls in. Christ on a bike.
0-2: O'Brien chases back 30 yards to make a great challenge on the halfway line. Sadly, he then gets done (small 'd') and is left the wrong side, as their bloke strolls out with the ball. Ball gets played out to their left wing where, somehow, their bloke only has Wiseman to beat. Without even a shimmy, he leaves Wiseman for dead then drives a shot straight through Steele on the near post. Appalling. But it does give what, in hindsight, was Keith Hill's death rattle - Wiseman being booed every time he touched the ball. I wish the half could have gone on for longer, cos I was starting to enjoy that.
Half time comes and he takes Wiseman (and Done) off. And if I read it right, the reason why he dropped Stones for Wiseman in the first place was 'to take Stones out of the firing line'. Ho bloody ho. Are we Reds fans REALLY famous for hammering our homegrown stars with ability who are actually trying to DO SOMETHING? Don't answer that.
Anyone who wasn't there already knows the tale of our season by now - we've played relatively well, controlled the game, and find ourselves losing. But I'm hopeful - despite not scoring 2 goals in a home game ALL SEASON, I tell my dad we'll score 3 in a half to record a famous victory. OUR SEASON STARTS HERE. Well, I was half right!
Despite not creating owt, 2nd half, we pull one back when Redfear...sorry, Dawson, drives past a couple of players and into the box and then hammers a left footer into the top right hand corner from just inside the box. Fans cheer but there's no conviction. Were they worried the comeback was ON and Keith Hill would remain IN? Unfortunately, the comeback is probably over once Tudgay goes in for a header and crashes into the keeper. He's completely laid out and the ensuing delay brings 9 minutes of proper 'injury' time. Presuming it's the end of his stay at Oakwell, and I DO hope he's recovered, but I couldn't help but think 'excellent, perhaps we can get him off our wage bill now as well, bloody waste of space'. And this was one of his GOOD games!
We continue to take the game to Rovers, but are stretched, what with having only ten men and all (hang on - haven't we played with 10 men the entire time Tudgay's been here???). Consequently, we all get to see who you DON'T want to see try to defend against Jordan Rhodes, one-on-one, despite being at the ball 1st. Why, it's Super Jim McNulty! That bloke who used to be a defender for us, but this season has collapsed into a wallowing mass of panicky jelly, with delusions of Beckenbaueresque grandeur. Ball bounces awkwardly, McNulty heads ball up in air, cedes possession to Rhodes (use your STRENGTH for chrissakes and stop s***ing yourself!!!!) who knocks it past him and fires home.
*** Dawson. There is only one player on the park. So it goes without saying he doesn't get MOTM.
** O'Brien. Constant endeavour from central-mid. Sponsors MOTM.
* Stones. Can't be hard to look good tho when you're replacing Scott Wiseman.
Despatches:
Noble-Lazarus came on and looked dangerous (until he shot - 2 high wide and not very handsome) and Sinclair looked alright. Or are these things relative?
Aside from the booing of Wiseman, my other Favourite Thing was when McNulty strolled forward with the ball, looked left, looked right, looked ahead, then got tackled and jumped up berating anyone and everyone while they counter-attacked. Dangerous Brian O'Callaghan's entire BFC career probably only involved being done like this 3 times, yet McNulty loses it EVERY match in this way, at least once.
Bottom of the table, there is only one way to go now - ONWARDS AND UPWARDS! Discussion on the train (drink du jour: Smirnoff vodka and coca-cola - the real thing) included me wondering when, or if, Barnsley FC have EVER finished bottom of the table before . Certainly not in my lifetime! A text from Official Barnsley Trainspotter P. Waddington comes up with the answer: 1963/64 or summat. Could this be the 1st Reds side in nearly 50 years to come rock bottom? We're already on our longest run of home games without a win since 1952-53 (thanks to the Chronicle for that). Still, there is hope. If Roy Castle is right, and if we want to beat any records, then 'dedication's what you need'. Another thing we don't have.
Keith Hill, R.I.P.
Sunday, 23 December 2012
Millwall 1-2 Barnsley, Saturday 22nd December 2012
HAPPY CHRISTMAS KIDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Rumour has it Keith Hill has been added to the Londontykes Yahoo group as he takes on board my advice and plays O'Brien, Perkins, Dawson....and Sir Bobby! I'm sure he'd have had Tudgay out as well, were it not for an injury depriving us of Davies.
'Fack me, how'd we lose to THEM?'* Well, I'll tell you how. We scored more goals than you. 1st half, we withstood a decent period of pressure then ran to the other end of the field and a smart move involved Dagnall (?) cutting inside, hitting a shot, the keeper saved and Dawson was left with a tap in. Great counter attack. Earlier, Henderson had blazed a penalty high and wide after what looked like an outlandish claim. Their guy cuts inside Wiseman, who appeared to pull his leg back as their guy takes a dive. The ref (Trevor 'Bloody' Kettle) takes an age to whistle, so much so I was convinced he'd blown for the dive. The linesman, meanwhile, saw nought.
2nd half, and our job is done when their midfielder is sent off for a challenge on Perkins. I could only see 2 blokes sliding in for a challenge, but to be fair to Pompey Ian, he called it straight away - their bloke 'scissoring' ours, with both feet off the floor. Of course, this is Barnsley and the job is never done. We spend half an hour playing on the break, and every time we had the ball it was 3 v 3 or 4 v 4. But we needn't bother trying too hard to score cos never in a million years will the Lions pull one back. Ha! One incident summed it up for me. We win a corner, it's taken short, then we play it back to Foster, 30 yards from goal and he punts it over the bar. Sorry, but how many times has Stephen Foster scored from 30 yards? And why, in a match against giants, are we not putting our biggest fellas in the box off a corner? Christ.
I tell yer wot, it only takes a cross from a dead ball for them to score (they had plenty of those, and as I said, they had 3 or 4 MASSIVE blokes). Or b) an aimless hoof down the pitch. I haven't seen it on telly yet, but one centre half takes more notice of the centre forward rather than the ball, and the ball clears his head, while the other centre half watches their other forward run past him and onto the hoof. We work so hard to take a lead and yet we can give them a goal from anything.
Thankfully, Millwall have scored too early. Although they had the momentum for a few minutes, they started committing way too many men to the attack (they have to learn when to settle for a point, the fools!) and I was increasingly optimistic we'd still steal it. I find it difficult to understand the psychology of (Barnsley) footballers. While we're winning 1-0, there is absolutely no need to force a 2nd, yet as soon as they realise the points are slipping away, they roll their sleeves up, dig deep....and hit them where it hurts.
MOTM? Everyone played well, everyone made mistakes.
*** Dawson. Redfearn does it again, as he drives from midfield and bags what coulda...shoulda....been the winner.
** Golbourne. Kept possession, clever balls down the line, always made himself available.
* Sir Bobby. Classic Sir Bob in the 1st half, as he held his defensive midfield position, drove forward when appropriate and threw himself into crucial blocks in the box when the defenders weren't up to the task. Welcome back!!!
Despatches:
Dear BFC, here's a tip for you. When the 2 midget forwards are up against 2 brick s***houses of a central defence, try NOT to spend the match kicking balls to their heads. They will not be able to hold the ball up, Millwall will win back possession and we will be back on the defensive foot. Just a thought. It was no surprise that when the winner came it was when we were playing the ball to feet and dragging (slow) defenders out to places they couldn't recover from. Another great breakaway goal, with Tudgay having so much time he turns around, looks at the linesman, cannot believe he's onside, then trundles towards goal before dinking the ball superbly over the keeper. 200 Reds fans go ballistic. 200 Reds fans start hiding their scarves for the journey out of the ground.
Defence: After Crainie went off injured, Wiseman came on as centre half. I'll not knock him for the penalty, cos as I said, I didn't think it was one. But he was given a torrid time at by their brick s***house of a centre forward and he took an early booking. So fair play to him when, during a lull in proceedings, he trotted over to the bench, had a word, and before you knew it, him and Stones had swapped positions. Well done that man.
Keith Hill: Well done on putting out a team of triers. But the substitutions were a tad strange. Tudgay was a virtual passenger in that last half an hour. And Hill would have been hung had we not won, taking off O'Brien for no particular reason.
Sir Bobby: The crowd let him know - he is the love of their lives. Can anyone tell me the last match he played? Yes, that's right, Charlton away. Coincidence?
JINGLE BELLS JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE ALL THE WAY, OH WHAT FUN IT IS TO SEE BARNSLEY WIN AWAY, OHHH.....
* said a bloke on the train.
Further despatches:
Golbourne threaded the through ball for the goal - which looked offside. Or was it Tudgay's turn of pace???
And it was NEVER a penalty in a gazillion years. Absolutely outrageous.
Rumour has it Keith Hill has been added to the Londontykes Yahoo group as he takes on board my advice and plays O'Brien, Perkins, Dawson....and Sir Bobby! I'm sure he'd have had Tudgay out as well, were it not for an injury depriving us of Davies.
'Fack me, how'd we lose to THEM?'* Well, I'll tell you how. We scored more goals than you. 1st half, we withstood a decent period of pressure then ran to the other end of the field and a smart move involved Dagnall (?) cutting inside, hitting a shot, the keeper saved and Dawson was left with a tap in. Great counter attack. Earlier, Henderson had blazed a penalty high and wide after what looked like an outlandish claim. Their guy cuts inside Wiseman, who appeared to pull his leg back as their guy takes a dive. The ref (Trevor 'Bloody' Kettle) takes an age to whistle, so much so I was convinced he'd blown for the dive. The linesman, meanwhile, saw nought.
2nd half, and our job is done when their midfielder is sent off for a challenge on Perkins. I could only see 2 blokes sliding in for a challenge, but to be fair to Pompey Ian, he called it straight away - their bloke 'scissoring' ours, with both feet off the floor. Of course, this is Barnsley and the job is never done. We spend half an hour playing on the break, and every time we had the ball it was 3 v 3 or 4 v 4. But we needn't bother trying too hard to score cos never in a million years will the Lions pull one back. Ha! One incident summed it up for me. We win a corner, it's taken short, then we play it back to Foster, 30 yards from goal and he punts it over the bar. Sorry, but how many times has Stephen Foster scored from 30 yards? And why, in a match against giants, are we not putting our biggest fellas in the box off a corner? Christ.
I tell yer wot, it only takes a cross from a dead ball for them to score (they had plenty of those, and as I said, they had 3 or 4 MASSIVE blokes). Or b) an aimless hoof down the pitch. I haven't seen it on telly yet, but one centre half takes more notice of the centre forward rather than the ball, and the ball clears his head, while the other centre half watches their other forward run past him and onto the hoof. We work so hard to take a lead and yet we can give them a goal from anything.
Thankfully, Millwall have scored too early. Although they had the momentum for a few minutes, they started committing way too many men to the attack (they have to learn when to settle for a point, the fools!) and I was increasingly optimistic we'd still steal it. I find it difficult to understand the psychology of (Barnsley) footballers. While we're winning 1-0, there is absolutely no need to force a 2nd, yet as soon as they realise the points are slipping away, they roll their sleeves up, dig deep....and hit them where it hurts.
MOTM? Everyone played well, everyone made mistakes.
*** Dawson. Redfearn does it again, as he drives from midfield and bags what coulda...shoulda....been the winner.
** Golbourne. Kept possession, clever balls down the line, always made himself available.
* Sir Bobby. Classic Sir Bob in the 1st half, as he held his defensive midfield position, drove forward when appropriate and threw himself into crucial blocks in the box when the defenders weren't up to the task. Welcome back!!!
Despatches:
Dear BFC, here's a tip for you. When the 2 midget forwards are up against 2 brick s***houses of a central defence, try NOT to spend the match kicking balls to their heads. They will not be able to hold the ball up, Millwall will win back possession and we will be back on the defensive foot. Just a thought. It was no surprise that when the winner came it was when we were playing the ball to feet and dragging (slow) defenders out to places they couldn't recover from. Another great breakaway goal, with Tudgay having so much time he turns around, looks at the linesman, cannot believe he's onside, then trundles towards goal before dinking the ball superbly over the keeper. 200 Reds fans go ballistic. 200 Reds fans start hiding their scarves for the journey out of the ground.
Defence: After Crainie went off injured, Wiseman came on as centre half. I'll not knock him for the penalty, cos as I said, I didn't think it was one. But he was given a torrid time at by their brick s***house of a centre forward and he took an early booking. So fair play to him when, during a lull in proceedings, he trotted over to the bench, had a word, and before you knew it, him and Stones had swapped positions. Well done that man.
Keith Hill: Well done on putting out a team of triers. But the substitutions were a tad strange. Tudgay was a virtual passenger in that last half an hour. And Hill would have been hung had we not won, taking off O'Brien for no particular reason.
Sir Bobby: The crowd let him know - he is the love of their lives. Can anyone tell me the last match he played? Yes, that's right, Charlton away. Coincidence?
JINGLE BELLS JINGLE BELLS, JINGLE ALL THE WAY, OH WHAT FUN IT IS TO SEE BARNSLEY WIN AWAY, OHHH.....
* said a bloke on the train.
Further despatches:
Golbourne threaded the through ball for the goal - which looked offside. Or was it Tudgay's turn of pace???
And it was NEVER a penalty in a gazillion years. Absolutely outrageous.
Saturday, 22 December 2012
Barnsley 0-1 Washday, Saturday 15th December 2012
Better never than late...apologies all. Could this be the first MOTM e-mail which blames pantomime practice (and actual execution) for not sending my views earlier???
Anyway, decent performance, disastrous result. 3 cleared off the line for us, none cleared off the line for them. Result? 0-1. Lots of controversy about the goal as everyone bar me blames a foul on the keeper. In real time, it looked like Steele flapped. At the least, if only he'd gone to punch it rather than catch it, we'd have problies been safe. No, what got my goat about the ref was the way that 5 minutes later he gives a free kick for a foul on THEIR keeper which never was. How comes, every other team puts a player on Steele and there's never a free kick, and then, the minute we do it, it's a foul. If you saw the replay, Davies simply stands there, the keeper pushes him out (penalty?) and then runs around him to crash into his own player. I'm still growling.
*** Perkins. Ran the match when he came on.
** O'Brien. What a difference a bit of energy in central midfield made.
* Dawson. Took the game to Washday before being shunted out wide for the above substitutions.
Despatches:
the defence played well, and so did Davies. What a shame then that he has to play up there with such a no-mark as Tudgay. He's the lower league Berbatov, without the goals or the skill. Nice header over the bar from close in too. Reminded me of another ex-Reds striker a decade ago.
Then there's Buzsacky, who somehow manages to look anonymous despite having the key position on the park, central midfield. Did we see the (immediate) future at Oakwell last week? A high octane central midfield whose energy alone was enough to overcome Washday? Perhaps get the equally high octane Dagnall back up front alongside Davies too? (Ok, he never scores, but his game opens it up for others). Anyway, it says alot for these loan signings, that the best we've looked is when Hill plays his Primark players.
As for Hill, I appeared to be in minority of one and a half who don't want him sacked (yet). I'd give him the Millwall game and the 2 home games over Xmas...and if we still haven't won, get him out. There were hints at what we can do against Washday (tho admittedly they did look awful. Will we be meeting them again next season in division 3?)
As for the Big Nite Out, Marius got to see why we like the Old Number 7 so much, as we were turfed out for a fire alarm. Good timing tho, as I was queing for a round at the time. And in the afternoon, we couldn't get a beer on tap cos they'd given out - but thankfully, Waddington had the staff take out bottles from their Xmas gift sets. And after a curry overlooking the cleavages of Peel Square, we went to see Hicksy's mate's band, who I thought were tremendous. For anyone else who liked their sound, pick up a copy of 'Death of Cool' by early 90s indie troubadours Kitchens of Distinction. Seriously.
Come on you Reds! Now gotta s***, shower and not shave for Millwall.
0-1 to Barnsley.
Anyway, decent performance, disastrous result. 3 cleared off the line for us, none cleared off the line for them. Result? 0-1. Lots of controversy about the goal as everyone bar me blames a foul on the keeper. In real time, it looked like Steele flapped. At the least, if only he'd gone to punch it rather than catch it, we'd have problies been safe. No, what got my goat about the ref was the way that 5 minutes later he gives a free kick for a foul on THEIR keeper which never was. How comes, every other team puts a player on Steele and there's never a free kick, and then, the minute we do it, it's a foul. If you saw the replay, Davies simply stands there, the keeper pushes him out (penalty?) and then runs around him to crash into his own player. I'm still growling.
*** Perkins. Ran the match when he came on.
** O'Brien. What a difference a bit of energy in central midfield made.
* Dawson. Took the game to Washday before being shunted out wide for the above substitutions.
Despatches:
the defence played well, and so did Davies. What a shame then that he has to play up there with such a no-mark as Tudgay. He's the lower league Berbatov, without the goals or the skill. Nice header over the bar from close in too. Reminded me of another ex-Reds striker a decade ago.
Then there's Buzsacky, who somehow manages to look anonymous despite having the key position on the park, central midfield. Did we see the (immediate) future at Oakwell last week? A high octane central midfield whose energy alone was enough to overcome Washday? Perhaps get the equally high octane Dagnall back up front alongside Davies too? (Ok, he never scores, but his game opens it up for others). Anyway, it says alot for these loan signings, that the best we've looked is when Hill plays his Primark players.
As for Hill, I appeared to be in minority of one and a half who don't want him sacked (yet). I'd give him the Millwall game and the 2 home games over Xmas...and if we still haven't won, get him out. There were hints at what we can do against Washday (tho admittedly they did look awful. Will we be meeting them again next season in division 3?)
As for the Big Nite Out, Marius got to see why we like the Old Number 7 so much, as we were turfed out for a fire alarm. Good timing tho, as I was queing for a round at the time. And in the afternoon, we couldn't get a beer on tap cos they'd given out - but thankfully, Waddington had the staff take out bottles from their Xmas gift sets. And after a curry overlooking the cleavages of Peel Square, we went to see Hicksy's mate's band, who I thought were tremendous. For anyone else who liked their sound, pick up a copy of 'Death of Cool' by early 90s indie troubadours Kitchens of Distinction. Seriously.
Come on you Reds! Now gotta s***, shower and not shave for Millwall.
0-1 to Barnsley.
Monday, 3 December 2012
Watford 4-1 Barnsley, Saturday 1st December 2012
I’m confused. I could swear the Super Reds played some decent stuff at times and ran the game for chunks. So how comes we let in 4 goals, they hit the woodwork at least twice and Steele made 3 amazing saves? Well, perhaps some clues could be had from the goals conceded:
#1. Free header from a corner. Tudgay is the ‘marker’ as Deeney heads home. Presumably Hill did his homework and assigned the centre halves to other players? (Their centre halves?)
#2. Everyone in the away end sees their bloke break down the left. Everyone in the away end knows the player he’s just played it to is going to backheel the ball for player #1 to run onto. Unfortunately, Crainie doesn’t and the player is now free. No worries, we have plenty of other defenders available. Only Foster stands and stares, doesn’t bother closing down, electing to stay with his man. Their left back cannot believe he’s got a free run at goal from virtually the corner flag and pokes it through Steele’s legs from an angle.
#3. Hilarious this one. Crainie is pulled up for a foul and while he’s arguing with the ref (even bothering to make sure he’s no longer ‘goal side’) they take it quick. Their centre forward drops back a couple of paces to take possession and drills it into the bottom corner while Foster (who’s attention he has evaded) stands rooted. (This is the same Foster, btw, who the others will tell you is MotM – well, that’s what they said in the pub.)
#4. McNulty finds himself completely the wrong side of their man and tries to do what he has systematically failed to do all match – tackle somebody. Needless to say, he ends up bringing down the man and the penalty is despatched confidently.
The second goal was the killer. At the start of the second half, it was all us. In fact, I was just complaining to Salisbury that the ball had been down the far end too long and I wanted some action where we were. One attack later and it’s 2-0. Over and out. Goodnight Barnsley FC.
However, even in the first half we more than matched them. The catalyst for this was probably the enforced subbing of an injured Mellis, for Dawson. The bloke in front allowed himself a chuckle as I told Mellis he limps faster than he runs (I swear this is true. No, not that I made the comment, or that the bloke laughed. But Mellis even put a jog on as he limped off). Dawson came on and for the rest of the half took the game to them. Tho perhaps the highlight was when he ran 20 yards to foul their player (who was shepherding it out for a goal kick) then told him to f*** off when he put his hand up, wanting to be helped him up. That’s the spirit, Stephen!
Sinclair missed the best (only?) chance. Through on goal, by rounding the keeper he gave the defender that extra second to get back and the resulting shot was duly cleared off the line.
Christ, nearly forgot MotM, ie, the whole point of this e-mail.
*** Steele. Couldn’t blame him for the goals and kept us in it with some super saves.
** Dawson. Cracking 15 minutes, then disappeared.
* Greening. Solid.
Oh, and guess who we shared the train with back to London? Well, none other than Mr Greening, who was off to London to see a musical with the missus (‘Wicked’, since you ask). No, he doesn’t like musicals, no, he won’t enjoy it cos we’ve lost, but he’s definitely looking forward to his lie in tomorrow, without 3 kids crawling all over him. Anyway, he seemed a decent chap. As all north-easterners are. No-one gave him a hard time, since he had yet another good game. Oh, and he was also a bit annoyed that we’d conceded that 2nd goal when we were in control of the match.
As for the fans today, not a big turnout (no surprise there) but time is running out for Hill. It is now officially ‘Bobby Hassell’s red and white army’ and 10/10 for my favourite chant….’Rochdale, it’s just like watching Rochdale’. If we lose to Washday in a fortnight, Hill needn’t worry about what the players eat and drink over Xmas, cos he simply won’t be there.
Despatches:
If Jim O'Brien cannot get into our team, we must be pushing for promotion. Once again he came on, looked keen and was sadly only let down by the other 9 or 10 outfield players. Reuben also looked keen ('We need bloody Lazarus' cried one wag).
As for bl**dy awful, how s*** must a fit Hassell be if he's behind Crainie, Stones and Wiseman for a right back berth and Foster, Wiseman and McNulty (and probably Collins) for a centre half spot? Crainie looks woeful to me at right back. Certainly worse than an out of form Stones. And problies about level with a Wiseman.
And McNulty? I am so gutted to see how such a fine player from last season has imploded. He looks absolutely shocking at the moment, game after game. Beckenbauer can seemingly do nought right, whether it's passing, tackling, marking, or strolling out of defence with the ball. Dare I say it, right now, he's reminiscent of Dangerous Brian (O'Callaghan).
What did cheer me up was seeing the return of Tim....also Caton came out...a pile of kids (even young Yasmin didn't seem as moody as usual) and Ben 10 showed what a gentleman he was by scoring an own goal winner in the table football to ensure we were beaten by 2 girls with a combined age of 14 (Yasmin and Lily).
It was that kind of day. (ps, we played well in patches, but despite some solid goalkeeping, a couple of fine strikes and some diabolical defensive play led to a flurry of goals and comprehensive defeat...anyway, I should've just stayed in the pub...I'd already seen the future!)
oh yes, forgot to add - we actually scored, last kick of the game. Their bloke f***s up and hands it to Tudgay on a plate.
#1. Free header from a corner. Tudgay is the ‘marker’ as Deeney heads home. Presumably Hill did his homework and assigned the centre halves to other players? (Their centre halves?)
#2. Everyone in the away end sees their bloke break down the left. Everyone in the away end knows the player he’s just played it to is going to backheel the ball for player #1 to run onto. Unfortunately, Crainie doesn’t and the player is now free. No worries, we have plenty of other defenders available. Only Foster stands and stares, doesn’t bother closing down, electing to stay with his man. Their left back cannot believe he’s got a free run at goal from virtually the corner flag and pokes it through Steele’s legs from an angle.
#3. Hilarious this one. Crainie is pulled up for a foul and while he’s arguing with the ref (even bothering to make sure he’s no longer ‘goal side’) they take it quick. Their centre forward drops back a couple of paces to take possession and drills it into the bottom corner while Foster (who’s attention he has evaded) stands rooted. (This is the same Foster, btw, who the others will tell you is MotM – well, that’s what they said in the pub.)
#4. McNulty finds himself completely the wrong side of their man and tries to do what he has systematically failed to do all match – tackle somebody. Needless to say, he ends up bringing down the man and the penalty is despatched confidently.
The second goal was the killer. At the start of the second half, it was all us. In fact, I was just complaining to Salisbury that the ball had been down the far end too long and I wanted some action where we were. One attack later and it’s 2-0. Over and out. Goodnight Barnsley FC.
However, even in the first half we more than matched them. The catalyst for this was probably the enforced subbing of an injured Mellis, for Dawson. The bloke in front allowed himself a chuckle as I told Mellis he limps faster than he runs (I swear this is true. No, not that I made the comment, or that the bloke laughed. But Mellis even put a jog on as he limped off). Dawson came on and for the rest of the half took the game to them. Tho perhaps the highlight was when he ran 20 yards to foul their player (who was shepherding it out for a goal kick) then told him to f*** off when he put his hand up, wanting to be helped him up. That’s the spirit, Stephen!
Sinclair missed the best (only?) chance. Through on goal, by rounding the keeper he gave the defender that extra second to get back and the resulting shot was duly cleared off the line.
Christ, nearly forgot MotM, ie, the whole point of this e-mail.
*** Steele. Couldn’t blame him for the goals and kept us in it with some super saves.
** Dawson. Cracking 15 minutes, then disappeared.
* Greening. Solid.
Oh, and guess who we shared the train with back to London? Well, none other than Mr Greening, who was off to London to see a musical with the missus (‘Wicked’, since you ask). No, he doesn’t like musicals, no, he won’t enjoy it cos we’ve lost, but he’s definitely looking forward to his lie in tomorrow, without 3 kids crawling all over him. Anyway, he seemed a decent chap. As all north-easterners are. No-one gave him a hard time, since he had yet another good game. Oh, and he was also a bit annoyed that we’d conceded that 2nd goal when we were in control of the match.
As for the fans today, not a big turnout (no surprise there) but time is running out for Hill. It is now officially ‘Bobby Hassell’s red and white army’ and 10/10 for my favourite chant….’Rochdale, it’s just like watching Rochdale’. If we lose to Washday in a fortnight, Hill needn’t worry about what the players eat and drink over Xmas, cos he simply won’t be there.
Despatches:
If Jim O'Brien cannot get into our team, we must be pushing for promotion. Once again he came on, looked keen and was sadly only let down by the other 9 or 10 outfield players. Reuben also looked keen ('We need bloody Lazarus' cried one wag).
As for bl**dy awful, how s*** must a fit Hassell be if he's behind Crainie, Stones and Wiseman for a right back berth and Foster, Wiseman and McNulty (and probably Collins) for a centre half spot? Crainie looks woeful to me at right back. Certainly worse than an out of form Stones. And problies about level with a Wiseman.
And McNulty? I am so gutted to see how such a fine player from last season has imploded. He looks absolutely shocking at the moment, game after game. Beckenbauer can seemingly do nought right, whether it's passing, tackling, marking, or strolling out of defence with the ball. Dare I say it, right now, he's reminiscent of Dangerous Brian (O'Callaghan).
What did cheer me up was seeing the return of Tim....also Caton came out...a pile of kids (even young Yasmin didn't seem as moody as usual) and Ben 10 showed what a gentleman he was by scoring an own goal winner in the table football to ensure we were beaten by 2 girls with a combined age of 14 (Yasmin and Lily).
It was that kind of day. (ps, we played well in patches, but despite some solid goalkeeping, a couple of fine strikes and some diabolical defensive play led to a flurry of goals and comprehensive defeat...anyway, I should've just stayed in the pub...I'd already seen the future!)
oh yes, forgot to add - we actually scored, last kick of the game. Their bloke f***s up and hands it to Tudgay on a plate.
Monday, 26 November 2012
Barnsley 1-2 Cardiff City, Saturday 24th November 2012
Another week, another defeat and despite 2 penalty claims being turned down, we really only have ourselves to blame. For once, chances were created – not that you’d know it judging from match reports I’ve read which completely disregard the fact anyone but Cardiff City got a kick. Dawson missed a sitter, arriving at the back post for an inch perfect cross, only to be taken by surprise and slice it wide. I’m sorry, but if you’re gonna make the run, DON’T be surprised when the ball actually reaches you! Then there was Tudgay’s miss before half time. Being at the away end, I got the impression most Reds’ fans weren’t quite aware of how bad a miss it was. A free kick was curled in and Tudgay looked 2 or 3 yards offside and flicked a header wide as if…he was offside and it didn’t matter. But he wasn’t and it did. 2nd half and Davies whipped in 2 balls across the box, the like of which he can only dream of being supplied himself. As it was, no-one was there for one, and Tudgay only moved once it had gone passed him for the other. Again, I know there’s a world of difference between a world class finisher like Lineker and a journeyman centre forward like Tudgay, but even I could teach Marcus something about gambling on the ball going into the right area and being there. Or b) you could hide behind the defender like every other Barnsley FC centre forward has done in the last 20 years.
Then there were the goals conceded. I’m sorry, Keith Hill, but I’ve seen enough of the Championship this season to see Cardiff scoring off corners. The 2nd was CRIMINAL. I kid you not, I have seen Cardiff score this goal at least 3 times this season. Whittingham bangs over a corner with his left, and while everyone goes with the Cardiff players in and around the 6 yard box, one guy peels off at the back post to nod home. As for the 1st, a simple header direct from the corner, Cardiff take advantage of the fact we don’t have a commanding centre half. As much as I would like to blame the goalkeeper when a team scores from close range off a corner, Cardiff EVERY TIME put 4 (FOUR) players in and around the keeper. Together with defenders, this means the keeper simply cannot come out and claim. Fair play to Cardiff. Every team (except us!) puts one player on the keeper, but this lot put half their team there. PLus 3 others in the box.
As the manager did say though, the players let Steele down badly. Both goals came from corners conceded from WORLD CLASS saves from Steele. The 1st one, their bloke turns our defender (McNulty? Wiseman?) like he’s not there before Steele tips the shot wide. The 2nd was even better. Crainie, (having a nightmare at right back), tries to be clever and wants to rob their player of the ball rather than boot it into the stands. Instead, he’s left looking like a fool as he himself has the ball robbed off him and their player strolls into the box. It’s 2 on 1, them v us, their forwards v Steele. The ball is squared to Helgusson who hits it firmly enough, but Steele somehow beats it away. Helgusson’s reaction tells you what an unbelieveable save it is, cos he looks stunned. To make up for his feelings, we let them score off the resulting corner.
*** Davies. Big, strong, direct, gets shots off, even held the ball sometimes. It was interesting that even with 2 men up front, it STILL felt like it was only Davies. And Cardiff agreed, often putting 2, even 3, men on him when he had the ball.
** Greening. Class act. As Hill said, he has the discipline to keep his position and hold the team together. Can also kick a ball 40 odd yards to a Reds player with EITHER foot, not the sort of ability I’m used to of a professional footballer at BFC. Sponsors MOTM.
* Steele. What can I say? Made a few saves and not at fault with the goals. Tho maybe my highlight, and a sad indictment of our style of play, was the 2nd half kick off. 4 backward passes then Steele slices the ball into the Main Stand. Start as you mean to go on and all.
Despatches:
I love Keith Hill. He listens to the fans. And after 2 months of me telling him we can’t afford to have a stroller like Mellis in central midfield, he drops him…to left midfield. Oh well, at least he can’t do any harm out there. To them OR us. But at least he bags a tap-in as a multitude of defenders track the run of Davies and ignore our Jacob. Who does FA else in the match, tho manages to get the ‘Football League Paper’ MOTM for us (6/10 since you ask).
On a Hill note, I read in last week’s Chronicle that Hassell has probably had his last game in defence for us, but is ‘still in the manager’s plans’ tho’ as a central midfield player. So Hill blows that one apart by replacing an injured Perkins and out of form Mellis with on-loan Greening. Can’t Sir Bobby take Hill to court on grounds of constructive dismissal? Cos nothing, simply NOTHING will have Hill pick this bloke. Wiseman could have his legs amputated and still get a game ahead of him.
As said, Crainie was appalling at right back. Wiseman was dreadful too, tho I thought he improved once he and Crainie swapped positions halfway through the 2nd half (the others disagreed – they thought Wiseman was the worst player on the pitch). However, for me, the worst of the worst, whether was trying to defend, or pass the ball, or bring the ball out, was McNulty. I thought he was outstanding for the most part of last season, and I’ll forgive him cos he’s just come back from injury. (Tho’ someone said it was his 4th game, so I take back that sympathy).
Despite the negativity of all the above, it was a pretty promising performance, much better than the Hudds and Forest games. We got stuck into Cardiff in that last 20 mins and could’ve (should’ve?) got an equaliser. 2 penalty appeals at the Ponty were turned down. The 1st looked nailed on to me, as Mellis shepherded the ball out of play and 2 of their guys just ran into the back of him. Corner (of course). The 2nd one, when Golbourne looked like he was clipped, I wasn’t so sure about (maybe he slipped), but the Ponty and East Lower were in no doubt. But my decision of the day was the ref booking their keeper for timewasting with TWO minutes left. This keeper was at it from the minute Cardiff went in front. (Note to Football League refs: a keeper may only hold onto the ball for a maximum of SIX seconds, otherwise it becomes an indirect free kick to the opposition from where the offence took place). So, for a second home game in a row we have seen the opposition take the lead then timewaste their way to victory. How depressing must the thought be that some teams must actually practice these tactics???
Other players:
Noble-Lazarus again looked keen when he came on. Hill has noted an improvement in his attitude in training and it shows. Rumour has it that it’s finally dawning on young Reuben that being a professional footballer is a far better option than the alternative – stacking shelves.
Buzaky – I’ve high hopes but he looked poor when he came on (central midfield). Lack of match practice? Anyway, he’ll come good by the time January comes round, allowing him to sign for a much better team than us.
Tudgay – I spoke to a Washday fan in the Old Number 7, who said that Tudgay doesn’t have much pace. So don’t worry about him being slow, cos he isn’t going to get any faster.
The crowd was 8,200 with ‘669 Cardiff fans’. There were NEVER 669 Cardiff fans. I presume 200 of them bought tickets and never bothered. I don’t know whether 500 is an appalling effort from a side at the top end of the division from a large urban conurbation, or a sad reflection on the state of the economy in this country. Either way, I don’t suppose 28 quid to get in helps.
Drink du jour: vodka and orange. Despite it being a favourite of mine, it tasted a bit bland after the spiced rum exploits. As ever, I fell asleep on my bus home and was woken up at the last stop by the driver. I blame the extra pints in the Euston Flyer with Andy, watching Real Betis beat Real Madrid.
Oh, and for a 2nd match in a row, I arrange to meet someone outside Oakwell after the game and I stand in the cold and wet while they don't turn up. Fair play to Hicksy tho, he sent me a text. I might have even read it if my battery hadn't ran out!
Onwards and upwards!
Then there were the goals conceded. I’m sorry, Keith Hill, but I’ve seen enough of the Championship this season to see Cardiff scoring off corners. The 2nd was CRIMINAL. I kid you not, I have seen Cardiff score this goal at least 3 times this season. Whittingham bangs over a corner with his left, and while everyone goes with the Cardiff players in and around the 6 yard box, one guy peels off at the back post to nod home. As for the 1st, a simple header direct from the corner, Cardiff take advantage of the fact we don’t have a commanding centre half. As much as I would like to blame the goalkeeper when a team scores from close range off a corner, Cardiff EVERY TIME put 4 (FOUR) players in and around the keeper. Together with defenders, this means the keeper simply cannot come out and claim. Fair play to Cardiff. Every team (except us!) puts one player on the keeper, but this lot put half their team there. PLus 3 others in the box.
As the manager did say though, the players let Steele down badly. Both goals came from corners conceded from WORLD CLASS saves from Steele. The 1st one, their bloke turns our defender (McNulty? Wiseman?) like he’s not there before Steele tips the shot wide. The 2nd was even better. Crainie, (having a nightmare at right back), tries to be clever and wants to rob their player of the ball rather than boot it into the stands. Instead, he’s left looking like a fool as he himself has the ball robbed off him and their player strolls into the box. It’s 2 on 1, them v us, their forwards v Steele. The ball is squared to Helgusson who hits it firmly enough, but Steele somehow beats it away. Helgusson’s reaction tells you what an unbelieveable save it is, cos he looks stunned. To make up for his feelings, we let them score off the resulting corner.
*** Davies. Big, strong, direct, gets shots off, even held the ball sometimes. It was interesting that even with 2 men up front, it STILL felt like it was only Davies. And Cardiff agreed, often putting 2, even 3, men on him when he had the ball.
** Greening. Class act. As Hill said, he has the discipline to keep his position and hold the team together. Can also kick a ball 40 odd yards to a Reds player with EITHER foot, not the sort of ability I’m used to of a professional footballer at BFC. Sponsors MOTM.
* Steele. What can I say? Made a few saves and not at fault with the goals. Tho maybe my highlight, and a sad indictment of our style of play, was the 2nd half kick off. 4 backward passes then Steele slices the ball into the Main Stand. Start as you mean to go on and all.
Despatches:
I love Keith Hill. He listens to the fans. And after 2 months of me telling him we can’t afford to have a stroller like Mellis in central midfield, he drops him…to left midfield. Oh well, at least he can’t do any harm out there. To them OR us. But at least he bags a tap-in as a multitude of defenders track the run of Davies and ignore our Jacob. Who does FA else in the match, tho manages to get the ‘Football League Paper’ MOTM for us (6/10 since you ask).
On a Hill note, I read in last week’s Chronicle that Hassell has probably had his last game in defence for us, but is ‘still in the manager’s plans’ tho’ as a central midfield player. So Hill blows that one apart by replacing an injured Perkins and out of form Mellis with on-loan Greening. Can’t Sir Bobby take Hill to court on grounds of constructive dismissal? Cos nothing, simply NOTHING will have Hill pick this bloke. Wiseman could have his legs amputated and still get a game ahead of him.
As said, Crainie was appalling at right back. Wiseman was dreadful too, tho I thought he improved once he and Crainie swapped positions halfway through the 2nd half (the others disagreed – they thought Wiseman was the worst player on the pitch). However, for me, the worst of the worst, whether was trying to defend, or pass the ball, or bring the ball out, was McNulty. I thought he was outstanding for the most part of last season, and I’ll forgive him cos he’s just come back from injury. (Tho’ someone said it was his 4th game, so I take back that sympathy).
Despite the negativity of all the above, it was a pretty promising performance, much better than the Hudds and Forest games. We got stuck into Cardiff in that last 20 mins and could’ve (should’ve?) got an equaliser. 2 penalty appeals at the Ponty were turned down. The 1st looked nailed on to me, as Mellis shepherded the ball out of play and 2 of their guys just ran into the back of him. Corner (of course). The 2nd one, when Golbourne looked like he was clipped, I wasn’t so sure about (maybe he slipped), but the Ponty and East Lower were in no doubt. But my decision of the day was the ref booking their keeper for timewasting with TWO minutes left. This keeper was at it from the minute Cardiff went in front. (Note to Football League refs: a keeper may only hold onto the ball for a maximum of SIX seconds, otherwise it becomes an indirect free kick to the opposition from where the offence took place). So, for a second home game in a row we have seen the opposition take the lead then timewaste their way to victory. How depressing must the thought be that some teams must actually practice these tactics???
Other players:
Noble-Lazarus again looked keen when he came on. Hill has noted an improvement in his attitude in training and it shows. Rumour has it that it’s finally dawning on young Reuben that being a professional footballer is a far better option than the alternative – stacking shelves.
Buzaky – I’ve high hopes but he looked poor when he came on (central midfield). Lack of match practice? Anyway, he’ll come good by the time January comes round, allowing him to sign for a much better team than us.
Tudgay – I spoke to a Washday fan in the Old Number 7, who said that Tudgay doesn’t have much pace. So don’t worry about him being slow, cos he isn’t going to get any faster.
The crowd was 8,200 with ‘669 Cardiff fans’. There were NEVER 669 Cardiff fans. I presume 200 of them bought tickets and never bothered. I don’t know whether 500 is an appalling effort from a side at the top end of the division from a large urban conurbation, or a sad reflection on the state of the economy in this country. Either way, I don’t suppose 28 quid to get in helps.
Drink du jour: vodka and orange. Despite it being a favourite of mine, it tasted a bit bland after the spiced rum exploits. As ever, I fell asleep on my bus home and was woken up at the last stop by the driver. I blame the extra pints in the Euston Flyer with Andy, watching Real Betis beat Real Madrid.
Oh, and for a 2nd match in a row, I arrange to meet someone outside Oakwell after the game and I stand in the cold and wet while they don't turn up. Fair play to Hicksy tho, he sent me a text. I might have even read it if my battery hadn't ran out!
Onwards and upwards!
Monday, 12 November 2012
Barnsley 0-1 Huddersfield Town, Saturday 10th November 2012
What shower of s***. Huddersfield score then timewaste their way to victory. 'At least the ref added 5 mins at the end' said one woman to her bloke outside Oakwell. 'It could've been 2 hours' he replied. Yes, we lost in what must have been one of the worst games any neutral could watch since Stoke City last came to town. From a Reds perspective, it was simply awful. Poor passing, poor movement, no creativity and zero cutting edge. I have had it up to HERE (that's me raising my hand very high in the air) with Jacob Mellis. He strolls around making FA difference in our midfield and is rewarded with 90 minutes every week. In the meantime, Dawson is busting a gut up and down the pitch and looks like the only threat we have. So he gets taken off.
The last 15 mins was just embarrassing. Huddersfield played keep ball and when we won it back we simply hoofed it downfield back to them. So much for our passing game. We were exciting for about 2 minutes after Mido and Jim O'Brien came on, but then we reverted back to type. Oh, and as for Etuhu, he's like a poor man's Odejayi. Or Francke Nouble. Woeful. The amount of times the ball was played to his feet, either to cannon off him, or the defender simply step out past him to take the ball was....well, it breaks my heart to see 'professional' footballers be this bad. Even on a 'free' he looks overpriced.
Certainly there were alot of varying opinions in the pub afterwards. Selwood felt Mellis had a good game and no-one could understand my choice of MOTM. As for the goal, who are we blaming this week? Stones, for being too far up the pitch when we lost it? Foster for not cutting out the cross? Or Steele for allowing Beckford to nip in and head home. The concensus was Foster, who coulda...shoulda...just lumped the bloke in to the stand.
*** Wiseman. The rock in central defence. Won everything and his pace cut out trouble plenty of times. Certainly, he has to cover for Foster who looks slower by the week. And even when Wiseman made mistakes (for he made a few) he recovered.
** Steele. Made 3 or 4 decent saves, including a one-on-one that looked a certain goal. Welcome back, Steele. 3 matches, 3 (depending on your opinion) MOTM performances, 3 defeats.
* Dawson. As I said.
Sponsors MOTM: Stee-el, Stee-el
Despatches: Crainie was outstanding 1st half, defensive midfield. O'Brien looked exciting when he came on (he must be a shoe-in to get his place back) and even Noble-Lazarus appeared keen. Mido came on was like a raging bull, getting booked for running 25 yards to take one of their men out. But as Selwood said - he came on and spurred the crowd a bit.
The journey back?
Well, the missus has been told it was Selwood's fault for daring me, but it really isn't clever to be necking bourbon neat (or on the rocks). I dispensed with the coke, since the honey flavoured drink du jour tasted nice enough and Selwood dared me to drink the rest of the bottle (while the others had the traditional Jim Beam). I have no idea if I succeeded, but I tried. Well, I problies shouldn't have to tell you, but once again I fell asleep on the bus home, Sarah phoned me and woke me up and I had no idea where I was. I don't know how I got home, but at 3am I went to bed. And after sensibly putting the blanket over the duvet cover, I climbed in fully clothed. I have no remembrance of this. I don't think Sarah was impressed.
Oh, and I almost forgot the highlight of my day - seeing an 82 year old being tripped over by a blind man! It happened as we got off the train at Wakey and you shoulda seen Gerry. He was ready to give this bloke a right mouthful, till we pointed out his white stick. GRRRRRRRRRRRR!
And yes, my dad was nearly right with his prediction this week: if we keep a clean sheet we might get a point. 'Barnsley nil' is starting to grate on me, however much I'm getting used to it.
The last 15 mins was just embarrassing. Huddersfield played keep ball and when we won it back we simply hoofed it downfield back to them. So much for our passing game. We were exciting for about 2 minutes after Mido and Jim O'Brien came on, but then we reverted back to type. Oh, and as for Etuhu, he's like a poor man's Odejayi. Or Francke Nouble. Woeful. The amount of times the ball was played to his feet, either to cannon off him, or the defender simply step out past him to take the ball was....well, it breaks my heart to see 'professional' footballers be this bad. Even on a 'free' he looks overpriced.
Certainly there were alot of varying opinions in the pub afterwards. Selwood felt Mellis had a good game and no-one could understand my choice of MOTM. As for the goal, who are we blaming this week? Stones, for being too far up the pitch when we lost it? Foster for not cutting out the cross? Or Steele for allowing Beckford to nip in and head home. The concensus was Foster, who coulda...shoulda...just lumped the bloke in to the stand.
*** Wiseman. The rock in central defence. Won everything and his pace cut out trouble plenty of times. Certainly, he has to cover for Foster who looks slower by the week. And even when Wiseman made mistakes (for he made a few) he recovered.
** Steele. Made 3 or 4 decent saves, including a one-on-one that looked a certain goal. Welcome back, Steele. 3 matches, 3 (depending on your opinion) MOTM performances, 3 defeats.
* Dawson. As I said.
Sponsors MOTM: Stee-el, Stee-el
Despatches: Crainie was outstanding 1st half, defensive midfield. O'Brien looked exciting when he came on (he must be a shoe-in to get his place back) and even Noble-Lazarus appeared keen. Mido came on was like a raging bull, getting booked for running 25 yards to take one of their men out. But as Selwood said - he came on and spurred the crowd a bit.
The journey back?
Well, the missus has been told it was Selwood's fault for daring me, but it really isn't clever to be necking bourbon neat (or on the rocks). I dispensed with the coke, since the honey flavoured drink du jour tasted nice enough and Selwood dared me to drink the rest of the bottle (while the others had the traditional Jim Beam). I have no idea if I succeeded, but I tried. Well, I problies shouldn't have to tell you, but once again I fell asleep on the bus home, Sarah phoned me and woke me up and I had no idea where I was. I don't know how I got home, but at 3am I went to bed. And after sensibly putting the blanket over the duvet cover, I climbed in fully clothed. I have no remembrance of this. I don't think Sarah was impressed.
Oh, and I almost forgot the highlight of my day - seeing an 82 year old being tripped over by a blind man! It happened as we got off the train at Wakey and you shoulda seen Gerry. He was ready to give this bloke a right mouthful, till we pointed out his white stick. GRRRRRRRRRRRR!
And yes, my dad was nearly right with his prediction this week: if we keep a clean sheet we might get a point. 'Barnsley nil' is starting to grate on me, however much I'm getting used to it.
Monday, 29 October 2012
Barnsley 1-4 Nottingham Forest, Saturday 27th October 2012
The view from Camberwell:
Start as you mean to go on – badly. The ‘Super Reds’ enter the arena to a bunch of kids waving flags while wearing the blue and white stripes of local rivals Sheffield Wednesday. Whatthehell was that all about? Can one of you supporters club types ‘have a word’???
The match? I heard rumours we went ahead and looked comfortable. My version of events was that they were all over us, looked a constant threat, missed an unbelieveable chance when Sharp headed wide and we hit them on the break. Great goal too, which the Football League Show sadly edited to one pinpoint throughball from Mellis. I’d have shown Dawson breaking past 3 players first, before laying the ball off to Mellis to make an easy pass into acres of space to a weirdly unmarked Harewood. Cool finish as well, though when he rounded the keeper I still thought he was thinking twice about actually putting the ball in the net against his old team. (Previously, Forest fans were regaling his name, something not likely to happen with us).
What an odd game Harewood had. Either you thought he had a smashing game and was our greatest threat, or he was a comedy of errors. Anyone putting him 3rd in their top 3 is bottling the decision. He’s either MOTM or stunk to high heaven, save for scoring a one-on-one under no defensive pressure at all. I thought he was pants. He blazed an early free kick over the bar but even that looked half decent compared to when he was clean through wide right and kicked the pitch rather than the ball, which trickled out of play to derision. He did whip in a couple of good balls, but equally, he was falling over himself half the time – it being difficult to co-ordinate one’s self if one is over 6 feet tall and carrying 16 stones (and the rest).
And I haven’t even got to the goalkeeper, yet. It’s been said before, and it’ll be said again – he’s an accident waiting to happen. Only this time, he was 3 accidents waiting to happen. I blame him for all the first 3 goals and as my dad said at half time ‘It’s a bit depressing to know we’ve lost already.’ #1 was the softest goal I’ve seen in an age. Halford cuts inside and nudges a ball goalwards with the outside of his right foot. 5 minutes later the ball is still trickling towards our goal when a slight deflection off Foster takes the ball to within a yard of the middle of the goal. Where our keeper was or what our goalkeeper was doing is a mystery beyond me.
#2 involves the keeper actually saving something but serving it up on a plate for Cox to tap in the rebound. Sharp should’ve buried the first effort but he doesn’t hit it hard enough and, for me, the keeper shoulda caught it, nevermind pushing it round the post for a corner. Still, 10/10 to Alnwick for jumping up after conceding to belatedly shout for offside. The desperate measure of a desperate man. He wasn’t. Then, as the stadium announcer tells us there’s gonna be X amount of minutes of injury time, I see their bloke hit a harmless looking 25 yarder, nice height to save….it flies through Alnwick’s grasp. #4 sees Jenas deftly dink the ball over Benny, a cool finish, but I note this: Steele saves more one-on-ones than he lets in. He’s top drawer and if he’s fit enough for the bench, he’s gotta be fit enough to play. And if he’s not fit enough, then get someone else in, cos this bloke in the nets now is a disaster.
The match? I heard rumours we went ahead and looked comfortable. My version of events was that they were all over us, looked a constant threat, missed an unbelieveable chance when Sharp headed wide and we hit them on the break. Great goal too, which the Football League Show sadly edited to one pinpoint throughball from Mellis. I’d have shown Dawson breaking past 3 players first, before laying the ball off to Mellis to make an easy pass into acres of space to a weirdly unmarked Harewood. Cool finish as well, though when he rounded the keeper I still thought he was thinking twice about actually putting the ball in the net against his old team. (Previously, Forest fans were regaling his name, something not likely to happen with us).
What an odd game Harewood had. Either you thought he had a smashing game and was our greatest threat, or he was a comedy of errors. Anyone putting him 3rd in their top 3 is bottling the decision. He’s either MOTM or stunk to high heaven, save for scoring a one-on-one under no defensive pressure at all. I thought he was pants. He blazed an early free kick over the bar but even that looked half decent compared to when he was clean through wide right and kicked the pitch rather than the ball, which trickled out of play to derision. He did whip in a couple of good balls, but equally, he was falling over himself half the time – it being difficult to co-ordinate one’s self if one is over 6 feet tall and carrying 16 stones (and the rest).
And I haven’t even got to the goalkeeper, yet. It’s been said before, and it’ll be said again – he’s an accident waiting to happen. Only this time, he was 3 accidents waiting to happen. I blame him for all the first 3 goals and as my dad said at half time ‘It’s a bit depressing to know we’ve lost already.’ #1 was the softest goal I’ve seen in an age. Halford cuts inside and nudges a ball goalwards with the outside of his right foot. 5 minutes later the ball is still trickling towards our goal when a slight deflection off Foster takes the ball to within a yard of the middle of the goal. Where our keeper was or what our goalkeeper was doing is a mystery beyond me.
#2 involves the keeper actually saving something but serving it up on a plate for Cox to tap in the rebound. Sharp should’ve buried the first effort but he doesn’t hit it hard enough and, for me, the keeper shoulda caught it, nevermind pushing it round the post for a corner. Still, 10/10 to Alnwick for jumping up after conceding to belatedly shout for offside. The desperate measure of a desperate man. He wasn’t. Then, as the stadium announcer tells us there’s gonna be X amount of minutes of injury time, I see their bloke hit a harmless looking 25 yarder, nice height to save….it flies through Alnwick’s grasp. #4 sees Jenas deftly dink the ball over Benny, a cool finish, but I note this: Steele saves more one-on-ones than he lets in. He’s top drawer and if he’s fit enough for the bench, he’s gotta be fit enough to play. And if he’s not fit enough, then get someone else in, cos this bloke in the nets now is a disaster.
Ode to Ben Alnwick:
Oh Alnwick,
You make me panic.
You pr*ck.
*** Dawson. Foraging runs from midfield, getting stuck in, kept Reid quiet. So the manager takes him off after 55 minutes.
** Done. Looked quick and a threat out wide. So the manager takes him off after 60 minutes to put on a left back and push Golbourne further forward. Like that’ll work.
* Kennedy. Said left back. Thought he did alright actually.
Sponsors MOTM? Teacher’s Pet , Scott Wiseman. Errrr….kept them down to 4 goals? Still, he had a lovely view of the Jenas goal as he stood and watched him run through. Thankfully, Forest were happy to sit back and take the ‘pressure’ 2nd half, rather than go for the jugular. Much appreciated. I don't like being embarrassed.
I was babysitting this game. My dad’s friend couldn’t make it, so he gave my ticket to another mate while I sat in first friend’s seat looking after a 10 year old. A little voice half way through the first half said ‘Why isn’t Bobby Hassell playing?’ I don’t know, Bailey, I don’t know. (He was on the bench.)
Despatches:
Oh Alnwick,
You make me panic.
You pr*ck.
*** Dawson. Foraging runs from midfield, getting stuck in, kept Reid quiet. So the manager takes him off after 55 minutes.
** Done. Looked quick and a threat out wide. So the manager takes him off after 60 minutes to put on a left back and push Golbourne further forward. Like that’ll work.
* Kennedy. Said left back. Thought he did alright actually.
Sponsors MOTM? Teacher’s Pet , Scott Wiseman. Errrr….kept them down to 4 goals? Still, he had a lovely view of the Jenas goal as he stood and watched him run through. Thankfully, Forest were happy to sit back and take the ‘pressure’ 2nd half, rather than go for the jugular. Much appreciated. I don't like being embarrassed.
I was babysitting this game. My dad’s friend couldn’t make it, so he gave my ticket to another mate while I sat in first friend’s seat looking after a 10 year old. A little voice half way through the first half said ‘Why isn’t Bobby Hassell playing?’ I don’t know, Bailey, I don’t know. (He was on the bench.)
Despatches:
Perkins had that 'other' game of his, the one where he is 2nd to everything and gave away what ball he did have. While his midfield mate Mellis...well, if he'd played till now he still wouldn't have a sweat on. To call him a stroller would be an exaggeration. The way he lays a ball off square, pretends like he's gonna turn and run forward, but instead trots back to his centre circle role to take an easy ball back reminds me of McPhail in his pomp.
ps, a great day was cemented at full time when I stood outside the club shop to meet Gerry, as arranged beforehand. He never turned up. When I rang him ‘Where are you?’ ‘I’m at the station.’ Great. Still, there’s always drinks on the train to look forward to. So Andy accidentally buys ginger beer instead of ginger ale to go with our spiced rum. I don’t know whether the burning sensation in my throat was from the rum or the ginger. Still, it was drinkable. (Mind, I worry that it's taken Andrew 45 years to find out ginger beer is different to ginger ale.)
ps, a great day was cemented at full time when I stood outside the club shop to meet Gerry, as arranged beforehand. He never turned up. When I rang him ‘Where are you?’ ‘I’m at the station.’ Great. Still, there’s always drinks on the train to look forward to. So Andy accidentally buys ginger beer instead of ginger ale to go with our spiced rum. I don’t know whether the burning sensation in my throat was from the rum or the ginger. Still, it was drinkable. (Mind, I worry that it's taken Andrew 45 years to find out ginger beer is different to ginger ale.)
Monday, 22 October 2012
Charlton 0-1 Barnsley, Saturday 20th October 2012
I think we can all agree that was a great day - even allowing for standing at London Bridge station for half an hour waiting for Gerry! We controlled the match from start to fin...well, from start till the 80th minute, when they went down to 10 men then all of a sudden we couldn't get out of our own half. Excellent crowd, great atmosphere. It was good to see so many Reds fans take advantage of the offer to get in for a fiver. Tho a 'boooooooo' to all those who said they'd come and then couldn't be bothered/had better things to do.
*** Perkins. Interception after interception, then played balls along the floor to teammates. It's THAT simple folks. The Charlton fan at work also agreed 'that little blond fella in midfield looked great for youse'.
** Davies. Took the game to Charlton up front, a constant threat. Woulda been good had he a little more support sometimes.
* Alnwick. Only made one difficult save (that I can think of) but came and collected plenty of times and his kicking remains very good.
Despatches:
Well, full marks for winning, but I'd have taken Davies off sooner - he was knackered. Altho on top, the shooting was woeful. 4 pathetic long range efforts 1st half (none of which came from the one man we have who CAN kick a ball - Davies). It was noticeable Charlton stuck 2 men on Davies and made sure he couldn't do his trademark cut inside from the left and strike with his right.
I also thought Dawson had a tremendous game, great back up for Perkins, while Mellis seemed happy to stroll through the game. I also thought the Polish guy hadn't done much - till he scored. Stones was quiet, whilst Foster and Wiseman generally had things under control. And even when Wiseman was done, there'd be little David Perkins, back to clear up the mess.
And how ironic that on a day when I see Craig for the 1st time in yonks, I end up at an all night party involving copious amounts of class A's.
It's just a perfect day....Lou Reed knew what he was on about!
You Reds!!!!!!!
*** Perkins. Interception after interception, then played balls along the floor to teammates. It's THAT simple folks. The Charlton fan at work also agreed 'that little blond fella in midfield looked great for youse'.
** Davies. Took the game to Charlton up front, a constant threat. Woulda been good had he a little more support sometimes.
* Alnwick. Only made one difficult save (that I can think of) but came and collected plenty of times and his kicking remains very good.
Despatches:
Well, full marks for winning, but I'd have taken Davies off sooner - he was knackered. Altho on top, the shooting was woeful. 4 pathetic long range efforts 1st half (none of which came from the one man we have who CAN kick a ball - Davies). It was noticeable Charlton stuck 2 men on Davies and made sure he couldn't do his trademark cut inside from the left and strike with his right.
I also thought Dawson had a tremendous game, great back up for Perkins, while Mellis seemed happy to stroll through the game. I also thought the Polish guy hadn't done much - till he scored. Stones was quiet, whilst Foster and Wiseman generally had things under control. And even when Wiseman was done, there'd be little David Perkins, back to clear up the mess.
And how ironic that on a day when I see Craig for the 1st time in yonks, I end up at an all night party involving copious amounts of class A's.
It's just a perfect day....Lou Reed knew what he was on about!
You Reds!!!!!!!
Monday, 1 October 2012
Barnsley 1-1 Ipswich Town, Saturday 29th September 2012
Decent game and we dominated the 2nd half, yet we problies didn’t quite do enough to win. A point earned, I’d say, rather than 2 points lost against a side 2nd off bottom and out of form. We didn’t miss that many chances, cos we didn’t create many. We had plenty of the ball in their box, but it pinged around to anyone but our own players. And Ipswich were a cynical bunch, full of professional fouls and timewasting. Mellis in particular was targeted. Needless to say, the ref didn’t help. Those with a better memory than me had already commented how ‘Trevor Bloody Kettle’ never gives us anything. 2 decisions summed it up: Their goal was never a free kick in the 1st place, whilst he couldn’t wait to disallow Foster’s ‘goal’ for a foul on the keeper. The good thing about being a cynic is that it saved me getting off my chair when Foster bagged. I just knew the ref would call a foul, they always do. Having seen it on TV, Foster certainly makes contact with the keeper, but no more than he would do against an outfield player without a foul being given. Going down like a sack of s*** always helps.
*** Dawson. Official MotM. He was everywhere, and of course, hit a superb equaliser. Grabbed the game by the scruff of the neck as it looked like nothing would go our way. Whilst it’s early days and a little harsh on Dawson to compare him to Redfearn, the guy behind me hit the nail on the head – ‘He’s a better Gary Jones’.
** Wiseman. Thought he controlled the centre of defence.
* Cranie. Not sure he’s the ‘Rolls-Royce’ that Hill describes, but he’s tidy and keeps things ticking.
Despatches:
- Mellis. Excellent 1st half, faded 2nd.
- Dagnall. Another super game. Will he ever score tho? (No). Today he hit the post from an acute angle. Shame no-one followed up!
- Stones. Came on and arguably changed the game. Upped the tempo of our attacks, neat one-twos and effortlessly beat players.
- Alnwick. Didn’t I say t’other week he makes it exciting? How he failed to save that shot…well, it didn’t surprise me at all, to be honest. Excellent use of brass neck by getting up and screaming at the defence for his f*** up. Later on made a tremendous save from a header. Also, made 2 of the best passes of the game, to our right. Get him in midfield!
The train journey:
As Andy said, interesting. After our train was cancelled, we managed to get on the next one an hour later where we had the ‘pleasure’ of one of Millwall’s top boys and his gaggle of apprentices. Whilst there was an air of menace from him, at least the coppers were only 2 punches and a knifing away in the vestibule. (Andy) you were right telling the Hudds fan he shouldn’t have ‘had words’ with said hooliefan, as he did happen to mention how close Hudds boy had been to a kicking. I must have had 3 too many vodkas cos I lectured him on how that would hardly be fair, given there were about 8 of them and only of one of him. Anyway, if you meet a Millwall fan with a Cornish accent and looking like a pirate, that’ll be him.
Monday, 24 September 2012
Birmingham City 0-5 Barnsley, Saturday 22nd September 2012
And the view from the Camberwell jury…
YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU REDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!! So here’s why one must come to these random games (despite them being on telly and all). What a performance. The biggest away win since visiting Accrington Stanley in the 1930s (probably), we played Brum off the park from start to finish. Can there have been a more perfect performance? Even at 0-0 at half time, there’d only been one team in it. Of course, like any sane Reds fan, one feared we’d pay for those 1st half misses, but it wasn’t to be….we were AWESOME (dude).
Every outfield player did his bit. Only Alnwick had nought to do (thank god). The defence were comfortable, we were dominant in midfield and in Dagnall and Davies, we had a front 2 who Brum simply couldn’t cope with. It was embarrassing in the 2nd half, watching Davies up against someone he was stronger than, faster than and (most bizarrely) more skilful than. Who was that hapless centre half?
*** Davies. You can’t argue with 4 goals. 1st time since Currie?
** Dangerous. Very unlucky not to score, thanks to (at least) 3 great saves from England’s #2. The tip onto the post was particularly fabulous.
* Dawson. The new Redfearn, driving forward from midfield.
Despatches: Mellis. Outstanding, helped by Dawson’s efforts in the middle.
The fans? Well, dunno if you could hear us, but there was plenty of singing throughout from the 295 (not just when we were winning, tho obviously it got louder as the goals went in). Mind, I wondered if they’d turn us down on the telly, what with the popular ‘if you’re watching on the telly you’re a cnut’ chant. Plenty of ‘it’s just like watching Brazil’, which must perk the team up and a few ‘how sh*t must you be? We’re winning away’ which possibly doesn’t. Though one of my favourite chants, which I hope to air a little more often, was ‘5-0 to the Barnserlee’, which I find very very catchy.
As for Brum, well, I’ve always said they’re a fickle bunch, judging by the poor numbers they generally bring to Oakwell, but 13,000 odd at home for a team from ‘Britain’s 2nd city’ is p*** poor. But well done to the 5 or 6000 who stayed to watch the whole pasting. I know the feeling.
Oh, and sweet revenge for the 5-0 they gave us one year at Oakwell (0-0 till the keeper got sent off; Claridge possibly scored a hattrick that day).
Come the final whistle, it was time to button up, zip it up, and run the gauntlet of hundreds of local neanderthals outside (as is the St. Andrew’s custom) but it turned out they’d all gone home, sobbing.
EIEIEIO UP THE FOOTBALL LEAGUE WE GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Superb.
YOUUUUUUUUUUUUU REDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!! So here’s why one must come to these random games (despite them being on telly and all). What a performance. The biggest away win since visiting Accrington Stanley in the 1930s (probably), we played Brum off the park from start to finish. Can there have been a more perfect performance? Even at 0-0 at half time, there’d only been one team in it. Of course, like any sane Reds fan, one feared we’d pay for those 1st half misses, but it wasn’t to be….we were AWESOME (dude).
Every outfield player did his bit. Only Alnwick had nought to do (thank god). The defence were comfortable, we were dominant in midfield and in Dagnall and Davies, we had a front 2 who Brum simply couldn’t cope with. It was embarrassing in the 2nd half, watching Davies up against someone he was stronger than, faster than and (most bizarrely) more skilful than. Who was that hapless centre half?
*** Davies. You can’t argue with 4 goals. 1st time since Currie?
** Dangerous. Very unlucky not to score, thanks to (at least) 3 great saves from England’s #2. The tip onto the post was particularly fabulous.
* Dawson. The new Redfearn, driving forward from midfield.
Despatches: Mellis. Outstanding, helped by Dawson’s efforts in the middle.
The fans? Well, dunno if you could hear us, but there was plenty of singing throughout from the 295 (not just when we were winning, tho obviously it got louder as the goals went in). Mind, I wondered if they’d turn us down on the telly, what with the popular ‘if you’re watching on the telly you’re a cnut’ chant. Plenty of ‘it’s just like watching Brazil’, which must perk the team up and a few ‘how sh*t must you be? We’re winning away’ which possibly doesn’t. Though one of my favourite chants, which I hope to air a little more often, was ‘5-0 to the Barnserlee’, which I find very very catchy.
As for Brum, well, I’ve always said they’re a fickle bunch, judging by the poor numbers they generally bring to Oakwell, but 13,000 odd at home for a team from ‘Britain’s 2nd city’ is p*** poor. But well done to the 5 or 6000 who stayed to watch the whole pasting. I know the feeling.
Oh, and sweet revenge for the 5-0 they gave us one year at Oakwell (0-0 till the keeper got sent off; Claridge possibly scored a hattrick that day).
Come the final whistle, it was time to button up, zip it up, and run the gauntlet of hundreds of local neanderthals outside (as is the St. Andrew’s custom) but it turned out they’d all gone home, sobbing.
EIEIEIO UP THE FOOTBALL LEAGUE WE GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Superb.
ps, I heard me and my taxi driver (Molly) were seen on telly. Now, if THAT doesn't drive up viewing figures, I dunno what will. I trust I looked as smug as I felt. F***ing glorious.
pps, 80 odd minutes in, Sarah proclaimed herself bored. 'There hasn't been a goal in 10 minutes' she said.
Monday, 17 September 2012
Barnsley 1-1 Blackpool, Saturday 15th September 2012
Well, decent game, fair result, against one of the favourites for promotion. 1st half we were the better side, went a goal up (Davies shooting THROUGH the keeper), coulda had 2 penalties for handball (the 1st was a cross flicked on by a Blackpool hand, the 2nd, the guy 'saved' a header, with his hand outstretched). I can only presume the ref and linesman didn't see them, cos neither were 'ball to hand' or whatever phrase they use these days to claim it's not handball. Furthermore, the ref was problies a little unlucky in another decision, where he gave us a free kick just as Davies broke clean through. If he'd not been so quick on the whistle we'd have been looking at 2-0 up.
Having said that, the 2nd half was dominated by the Tangerines and we did well to hold out.
Difficult this week, but I'll go with:
*** Mellis. Cool, calm and calculating and gets us playing football.
** Davies. Led the line well and scored - again.
* Alnwick. I like Alnwick. He looks like a keeper who's gonna make something happen. Whether trying to catch a ball, kick it or save it, he always looks like there's mistake around the corner. Keeps it interesting, see. On Satdy, he came out for a cross and got nowhere near it, he kicked it along the floor a couple of times when trying to kick it long, but, crucially, he made some decent saves. In particular, he saved a late one-on-one after Stones was caught in possession in their half attempting to take on his 3rd or 4th man. Phew!
Sponsors MOTM: Foster (to guffaws around me). Foster and Wiseman problies had decent games overall, but we lost possession playing 'simple' balls 3 or 4 times in our own half. We cannot afford to do this. The '£2m rated' (I read) John Stones again looked awesome, but with a couple of silly errors. Like a better version of Ryan Shotton. Cwyka (?) again looked tidy and Dagnall was a handful throughout. Spot-on tictacs from Hill too, making the front 2 run their socks off before replacing them after 70 mins with Harewood and Done. Done looked a real threat on the break, tho Harewood was hapless.
Other despatches: A couple of things bugged me. First, too much sideways and backwards passing. There was a time in the 2nd half when Golbourne had 40 yards to run into with the ball (with men up to cross it to) and he stood, looked up, stroked his chin, thought better of it and turned back inside to knock the ball back to the centre half. And we've also gone back to that old habit of knocking the ball up to a dwarf's (Dagnall) head. Same last home game. If you're gonna aim for anyone's head, shouldn't it be DAVIES???
drink du jour: JD and coke. And you shoulda seen the grump on Gerry got when we told him he couldn't have any. (We relented in the end).
Having said that, the 2nd half was dominated by the Tangerines and we did well to hold out.
Difficult this week, but I'll go with:
*** Mellis. Cool, calm and calculating and gets us playing football.
** Davies. Led the line well and scored - again.
* Alnwick. I like Alnwick. He looks like a keeper who's gonna make something happen. Whether trying to catch a ball, kick it or save it, he always looks like there's mistake around the corner. Keeps it interesting, see. On Satdy, he came out for a cross and got nowhere near it, he kicked it along the floor a couple of times when trying to kick it long, but, crucially, he made some decent saves. In particular, he saved a late one-on-one after Stones was caught in possession in their half attempting to take on his 3rd or 4th man. Phew!
Sponsors MOTM: Foster (to guffaws around me). Foster and Wiseman problies had decent games overall, but we lost possession playing 'simple' balls 3 or 4 times in our own half. We cannot afford to do this. The '£2m rated' (I read) John Stones again looked awesome, but with a couple of silly errors. Like a better version of Ryan Shotton. Cwyka (?) again looked tidy and Dagnall was a handful throughout. Spot-on tictacs from Hill too, making the front 2 run their socks off before replacing them after 70 mins with Harewood and Done. Done looked a real threat on the break, tho Harewood was hapless.
Other despatches: A couple of things bugged me. First, too much sideways and backwards passing. There was a time in the 2nd half when Golbourne had 40 yards to run into with the ball (with men up to cross it to) and he stood, looked up, stroked his chin, thought better of it and turned back inside to knock the ball back to the centre half. And we've also gone back to that old habit of knocking the ball up to a dwarf's (Dagnall) head. Same last home game. If you're gonna aim for anyone's head, shouldn't it be DAVIES???
drink du jour: JD and coke. And you shoulda seen the grump on Gerry got when we told him he couldn't have any. (We relented in the end).
Friday, 10 August 2012
Hannover 96 2-0 St. Patrick’s Athletic, Thursday 9th August 2012
Hannover 96 2-0 St.
Patrick’s Athletic, Europa League 3rd Qualifying Round, 2nd leg (att. 24,500)
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| Welcome to ... |
After the grime of Chemnitz,
it was good to get back to the more usual beauty and greenery of a German city,
this time Hannover. I got lucky with my accommodation,
right in the city centre but inbetween the 2 places I needed most; the railway
station and the football stadium. I’d
also developed a migraine (perhaps another reason for my low morale yesterday)
so the first thing I did was go to bed.
A mid afternoon nap turned out to be just the medicine!
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| 1st view of the stadium. |
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| The Neues Rathaus |
By the time I’d done the once-around, the main ticket booths had opened. ‘What ticket would you like?’ ‘The cheapest.’ 25 euros to sit high up in the corner. The stadium holds 49,000, including 8,000 standing places (still a far cry from its record crowd of 86,000). The lower tier ‘terrace’ (where everyone had a flip-up seat, thereby fulfilling the all-seater directive) was sold out. Given the (relative) steepness of price, I wonder how much it was downstairs? St. Patrick’s Athletic in August can’t bet that much of a draw.
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| How to turn all-seater. |
It’s an impressive ground, one for which the term ‘stadium’ was invented. It sits atop a hill, looking every inch the modern day castle. Inside, perfect views all-round, the stands arching around the pitch. Yet there’s something too sanitised about it all. Too perfect. Though for any Premiership fan below the age of 30, it’s all they’ve probably ever known. It reminded me of the Etihad, yet with a mid-tier walkway for the fans, a la the Riverside, Middlesbrough.
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| The home end is a lot busier than the rest of the stadium. |
I scurried off, ticket in hand and when I checked my ticket…still no kick-off time. So I picked up the courage to speak to someone. ‘Half past 9’. ‘No, half past 8’ his colleague corrected. (In some parts of Europe they say ‘half to’ rather than ‘half past’.) So, time for a quick wander round town then back again. I had no penchant for lying around the nearby park, or the Maschsee, a massive artificial lake built by the unemployed under Hitler. I still had a bit of a headache.
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| Ticket booths before my lap of honour. |
On looking at the match ticket, I also discovered who the opposition were, St. Patrick’s Athletic of Ireland. Should be a cakewalk. I bought a programme and so it looked: the 1st leg had been won 3-0 by the Germans, away. In this one-sided game, Hannover cruised to a 2-0 win, mainly characterised by their players jumping out of the way of anything approaching a tackle, so as not to get injured for more important games to come.
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| The teams come out. |
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| St. Pat's huddled together in the far corner. |
One drawback was the refreshments. Being a slick operation, of course this was one of those ‘pay by stadium card’ things. I found this out as I queued for my ‘fischbrotchen’ (fish bread: a side of pickled herring, with onions, in a baguette). Thankfully, upon hearing my plight, a 96 fan offered to buy it for me, and wouldn’t accept payment. I salute you, sir! In chat, he was very much looking forward to the coming Saturday: a friendly v Manchester United. And I’d been wondering why tonite’s programme had so many pages devoted to last season’s Premiership runners-up!
Finally, what team still comes out to Queen’s ‘Rock You’? Hannover 96 of course! But on the plus side, there were plenty of bars around the Maschsee later, for an after-match drink.
The Damage:
€25 ent
€1.50 prog
= €26.50
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| Entrance/exit. |
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| Steward teamtalk (1) |
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| Mosaic outside the stadium. |
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| Mounted police pre-match. |
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| Steward teamtalk (2). |
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| This place wasn't selling quite what I'd hoped...! |
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| Pre-match parking. |
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| The fans queue to enter. |
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| The Hannover home end. |
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| A less than packed Main Stand. |
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| The view towards the far end (Sudtribune). |
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| Busier on this side. Cheaper? |
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| Match action. |
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| Welcome to ...(2) |
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