Norwich City 1-1 BFC, Saturday 18th November 2017

‘If you want a jelly baby, just ask, you don't have to kill me!'

Welcome to...while the teams line up.

80 years of hurt, never stopped us trying.  When will we ever win at Carrow Road?  Even when we dominate, we can’t get past the line, but I s’pose we must be grateful that we came back for a point, after a completely fortuitous completely against the run of play opener for the Canaries.  

All that was to come tho, as the ‘Banter bus’ left Peckham at 10 in the morn for a sojourn to the far east.  Not owning a car, I always get a tingle of excitement when I get chance to drive. Maybe it’s the thought of Selwood and Reedy’s life chances being at my disposal, I dunno.  However, by 9:45am the novelty had run out, as I’d gone the wrong way down the road from New Cross and found myself going the opposite direction to intended.  F***ing London.  I wouldn’t mind, but I’d been down said road dozens of times on my bike, but you find yourself in the wrong lane in a car and that’s it.  I arrived at Peckham Rye station dead on time tho, only to find Andy wouldn’t be arriving, his trains were up the spout and he’d see me at Blackfriars with Dave.  F***ing London. F***ing trains.

Only in Norwich.

The drive wasn’t too bad.  I don’t think those in the back saw I’d reached 115mph before I decided to ease back on the accelerator.  But I owed it to them: the quicker I got there, the quicker I could watch them drink.  We arrived, parked up in the County Hall car park (8 quid!) before Andy took us to a vegan pub he’d looked up last year.  Closed.  Great.  Walking towards town, we hit the stadium first.  To hell with it; let’s go Wetherspoons.  (Even then we had to be under cover: ‘No away fans’ though it didn’t stop them serving everything in plastic glasses. Never again.)

Pre-match parking.

I was very optimistic, despite the lack of victory in 17 previous outings (7 draws). This was why I was asking about our records at Norwich and QPR (the latter, 3 draws and 21 defeats in 24).  I’d seen on the Championship last week that there’s a team with an even worse away record than ourselves.  QPR (ironically) haven’t won at Forest in 29 games, the 1^st side ever to ‘achieve’ no victory in so many games away at the same opposition, I’m told.

Two of us enjoy a pint.

The optimism seemed founded too.  We ran the 1^st 10 minutes and they couldn’t get out of their half. Yiadom was rampaging down the right and we had Barnes on the left.  We looked slick going forward and we’d quietened the home crowd.  So naturally they scored with their first attack.  Fryers switched off, Lindsay failed miserably on the cover and no-one picked up the runner for the pullback.  OK, so they got jammy with the deflection off MacDonald, but it was appalling all round.  The Canaries finally made some noise.  ‘You only sing when you’re winning’ came the retort.  We continued to have the upper hand, but only had a Hammill snapshot from 20 yards to show for our efforts, Manchester City’s Angus Gunn tipping over.

The view from Carrow Road (till we moved).

I timed my half time p*** well.  Too late to inhale the smoke, early enough to return for what might be our goal of the season.  A lightning-fast break from our half and zippy passes meant we had a man on the overlap.  Moncur duly laid the ball off to Barnes and Leicester City equalised, calmly sidefooting home.  (Meantime, it actually was Leicester v Man City at the King Power.)  My pre-match prediction of 2-1 to the Super Reds didn’t look so daft now.

The home end and their revolving scoreboard.

Unfortunately, our plans were scuppered slightly by MacDonald having to go off injured, hurting himself clattering into a tackle that did well not to break the other bloke.  Angus (our Angus; has there ever been a match outside of Scotland with two Anguses?  Angusi?) had put in a brilliant block a few minutes earlier too.  A cracking return to form.  McCarthy came on and had a decent turn at centre half too.  He’s great.

Sunset over Carrow Road.

Hammill tired and Hecky brought on Hedges..and he was our big disappointment for me.  3 or 4 times he had time and space on the right, 3 or 4 times he cut inside onto his only foot and was tackled.  The fullback had him in his pocket.  Couldn’t he switch wings for a bit?  The fullback showed him to his outside, where Hedges would have had plenty of time to put in a cross with his righ…oh yeah, he doesn’t HAVE a right foot.  Otherwise, neither side really threatened and the Canaries showed what they thought of their team, booing them off.  To be fair to the home support, they didn’t get on the players backs during the game, though it was the most non-existent atmosphere in the home end I’ve ever seen.  And they must have been bad – they gave Marley a late trot out (but refused to give him the ball).  He should never have left us.

The players give thanks.

*** MacDonald.  At his imperious best. For 57 minutes.  

** Williams.  Broke down the Canary midfield.

* Barnes.  Always likely.

Londontykes' MOTM: 1. Williams  2. Barnes  3= MacDonald/Lindsay

Despatches:
What is it with away stewards, insisting on away fans sitting down while 3000 home fans can stand up all day behind the goal?  Still, we moved ourselves and had the seats above the gangway.  Perfect.  

Shouldn’t grumble too much about the players.  Essentially, we were great when we played it to feet, less so when we didn’t.  I heard someone say Lindsay had a good game, but for me, all he did was f*** up for their goal and ping balls to Bradshaw’s head.  Nevermind the 3 on 2 break where he passed the ball straight to one of their defenders.  I guess he was lost, being that far up the pitch.  Hammill wasted a great opportunity to lay the ball off to someone better placed, but otherwise never lost the ball. What he lacks in pace, he makes up for in intelligence.  Course, we now have Barnes for the cutting edge.  Davies was perfect – but who wouldn’t be, when you’ve little to do?  Yiadom faded after a promising start, while Fryers was blatantly under instruction not to venture too far up the pitch, which was a real shame.  I think we missed a trick here, Norwich were there for the beating, no need to be so conservative.  I can’t say I noticed Potts while it was a shame the half chances we created didn’t fall to Bradshaw.  Or maybe it wasn’t.  I’ve bets to win.  Moncur looked tidy, but was generally crowded out on the edge of the box.

You can't argue with stats.

Drink du jour: lemonade and latte.  Not together, am driving.  Later, a mini-Peckham pub crawl with Andy: The Hope, then a dodgy pub we never went in ‘I’m not going in there!’, The Prince of Peckham (suitably poncy), John The Unicorn (hipster central) and Peckham Springs, where the females were noticeably chubbier, according to my companion.

Onwards and upwards!

Away: 6-700. Decent atmosphere at times.  1^st time I’ve heard us outsing Norwich at their place. 

The Damage:
£25 ent
£3.50 prog
£8 car park

The Tunes:
BBC 6 Music

Norwich v Barnsley panorama.

Heading towards Mecca.

Is it a bird?  Is it...Yes, it's a bird.  A canary.

Hi Sarah!  (somewhere in the far upper tier)

BFC 2-1 Norwich City, Saturday 10th December 2016

‘That’s retribution fo’ 2002’

The view from the away end.

The omens were against us. 11 games without victory v the Canaries (9 defeats) and without a win at home in 7 (3 draws). The Geordie Al ready-reckoner worked out we therefore had zero chance of winning, 5 chances of a draw (2+3) and 13 of defeat (9+4). Hopefully, my wearing of the 3rd kit would cancel this out. After all, it’s the only kit we win in these days. ‘Dad, will you settle for a draw?’ ‘Yes’ he said, unequivocally.

There were however some positive omens from the previous week’s Chron, courtesy of Salisbury: Best player in the league (Hourihane – inc 3rd most tackles per match!), most saves in the division (Davies), as well as lesser known stats such as blocks and clearances (which our centre halves dominate) while Yiadom was 3rd in blocked crosses. Just shows what we already know: our defence are playing really well DESPITE the number of goals we concede. Oh, and we also had the most dribbles of any team, but quite how many of Kent’s efforts have ended up in goals…I can probably estimate at one. If that.

The view from the away (ladies) toilet.

Of course, I wanted to win this one. When your better half and father-in-law are Norwich fans, it would be nice to have bragging rights for a change. So I really enjoyed watching Scowen and Bree skin them down our right and a low cross being sweetly turned in 1st time by Bradshaw from 12 yards. Bradshaw! A proper centre forward! Actually, the move was reminiscent of the last home game, when Bree dropped one on Winnall’s head.

We continue to pile forward (though Norwich look dangerous on the break) and as we hang on to a one goal half time lead, Hourihane puts his foot through a 20 yarder and the slight deflection takes it into the top corner. F***ING YES! Hopefully we’ll score a hatful second half. I should have known better.

Norwich come out and nearly score within a minute. Alex Neil’s double substitution looks like paying dividends as they swarm all over us for the 1st few minutes. Then, just as we’ve weathered the storm, their guy hits a 25 yarder which goes THROUGH Davies. I feel sorry for our keeper. He had the perfect 1st half, and all anyone can remember is the shot he should have saved.

Davies on the alert

Thereafter, it was all hands to the pump, not helped by our side’s complete inability to pass the ball when we had it. I don’t think we put together more than 3 passes until the 80th minute. The team were panicking from front to back and no-one in midfield was prepared to put their foot on the ball. Yet in the last 20 mins or so, we had so many chances to break…3 on 3…but we wasted everything. The best chance we had of putting the game to bed, Kent broke 2 on 1, which became 3 on 2 as he slowed up, looking for the right option. Do I cross for Bradshaw? Do I pull it back for the onrushing midfielder? Do I go for goal myself and slice the ball so badly that Bradshaw ends up heading it back across goal for ? (Winnall?) to tap home. Of course it’s the latter, and the goal is chalked off for offside against Bradshaw. I’m not even convinced he was offside, but certainly that was entirely Kent’s fault for delaying too long and being s***. His time is up for me; either get Hamill or Janko into the team or drag Isgrove back from Soton. He’s not doing owt, is he?

Thankfully, Norwich miss all their (half) chances and Roberts makes the tackle of the match to prevent them being clean through. And if that was my favourite tackle, 2nd must go to Scowen, who nearly broke a player twice his size, who proceeded to limp, wince and moan till he realised he wasn’t getting anything…then trotted 30 yards to take the throw-in. As Wadd says, their ‘gamesmanship’ was amongst the best (worst?) we’d seen all season. ‘Premiership’ class. How many times did Reds fans have to tell the ref they were pinching god knows how many yards at EVERY throw-in, before the ref did owt? (Then he continued letting them do it. What’s the point?) Mind, he did everything to avoid booking anybody, including ignoring Hamill chucking the ball behind him to waste time.

Canaries!  Canaries!

*** Scowen. Josh only has 2 games for the Reds this season. Brilliant or dogs***. Today he was outstanding, running himself into the ground and making tackle after tackle. Twitter MOTM..
** Yiadom. What can you say? Fast, skilful, great tackler…and amongst the highest dribblers in the league (according to them there stats again). Basically, not only is he an outstanding defender, he’s also a better winger than we currently have.
* Roberts. Awesome in the second half, but can I be the only one to point out that the best chances Norwich had in the 1st half seemed to come from half clearances from our centre halves!

Londontykes' Top 3:
1= Scowen
1= Yiadom
3. Roberts

Mind, our resident Norwich contingent were convinced Bassong was our MOTM. Tis true, their centre halves and keeper were trying to play football that was beyond them. Reminded me of the good old days of...every BFC centre half and keeper partnership we've had till this one. (McNulty plus any 2, for a start; or 'Dangerous Bri' and friends)

The view towards the away end (or how useless my cameraphone is).

Despatches:
Davies caught and saved everything till he conceded, then he lost all confidence and never left his line. At least he made one decent save, diving low to his left. Bree recovered from a tricky start and then had the winger in his pocket. Hourihane showed his class with the goal, but I wish he’d had a greater say in the 2nd half. MacDonald defended stoutly that 2nd half, while Bradshaw and Winnall barely saw the ball. Kent was rubbish (I’m sorry, I can’t take it anymore, watching him dribble nowhere or simply fail to have the ball). You can only flatter to deceive for so long before you’re considered incapable. Morsy put himself about, and was able back up to Scowen’s scurrying.

Oh, and maybe there was another good omen for today; on the Donny to Meadowhell train some young lady in front of me kindly sat scrolling through her selfies on her phone, just for me.  She had quite the lingerie selection too. Shame some bloke got on at Rovrum and ruined my fun by sitting next to her.  She turned her phone off sharpish.

Drink du jour: This was annoying. Had to meet my dad pre-match for my season ticket, so missed out on an hour of drinking. Then, when we turned up, he said hello then had to leg it to the ground for a p***. Charming. So I decided to take the in-laws to celebrated watering hole ‘Redfearns’ only to be told to queue up! Likely. They should be grateful I’m bothering. So we didn’t. Previous journeys’ leftover vodka for the journey back. Saved a few quid.

Away: 1,287.

The Damage:
£21 on the train. Or free if the Captain has failed to make yet another journey. Add ‘the sh*ts’ to every other excuse he’s come up with so far this season.

West Stand lower.

Get well Patrick Cryne!