BFC 0-1 Wycombe Wanderers, Tuesday 3rd March 2026

’I live for the day he’s man of the match. He’s F***ING SH*T.’

I was walking down Grove Street after the game last nite when I saw a bloke with a white stick, arm in arm with another bloke. Behind him was another bloke using a white stick. It was the blind leading the blind, an apt metaphor for the game, I thought. Coach Conor, Wycombe having bossed the opening half, makes ZERO changes at half-time. We’re under the cosh again in the second half. ‘We’ve got to make changes’ texts B. Haigh of Lanzarote. ‘He will wait till they score’ replies Farnham. He waits till they score. Then subs the left footed left back for a right footer (Ogbeta hauled for O’Keeffe). We go on to win 3-1.

Of course, that’s in a parallel universe frequented by a coach with more skillz than Hourihane. If his golden foursome up front don’t bag, there is no Plan B. Sorry, there IS a Plan B (from Outer Space)…give it a few minutes, then swap O’Keeffe and right back Watson around, so we still have a right-footed defender (I use the term loosely) playing left back. It obviously confused me, cos when Watson put a delicious ball across our box for THEM to be clean through, I mistook him for O’Keeffe (who has previous for this offence). Well, they both have a ‘7’ on the back of their shirts.

It’s ok tho, cos Crapman has been behind the scenes on ‘Stars in their Eyes’ (look it up, kids) and has come out tonite as something approaching a goalkeeper. He runs out and saves, and together with a few catches and keeping the ball on the pitch in his hoofs, is given the official MOTM. (The Ponty disagree, finally clearing their throats for a couple of ‘Woooah…David McGoldrick’ chants.)

McGoldrick. Honestly, is this the future without POTY Kelly? Cleary marked out of it by 2 opponents, it’s left to McG to take it to Wycombe, going on 2 or 3 runs where he seemingly takes on half their side. Sadly, the only shot he gets off was a cut inside in the first half which curls harmlessly wide. It’s ok though, there’ll be another shot soon. (No there won’t.)

Phillips is generally anonymous, though I notice one of Coach Conor’s tactics is the ball over the top for a Phillips darting run. But the ball is either comfortably headed away, or runs through to the keeper. Banks looks promising early on, but between him and Watson it turns into a sh*tshow defensively. And that’s it from our ‘attacking players’. This includes half an hour of classic invisibility from Bradshaw (on for Banks), though Yoganathan almost offers hope for the last 15 (replacing Phillips). At least you notice Yoganathan, though I’ve yet to decide whether that’s cos he’s 6 foot 4 and has an amazing mop of hair, or cos he’s any good. ‘Better than the rest’ does not mean good. Not tonite.

That leaves 6 (6!) ostensibly defensive-minded players (plus a goalkeeper). And for a time, I started believing the elusive clean sheet would come. MdG first half, and O’Connell the second, looked strong. Certainly stronger than anything else we’ve seen this season. MdG reads the game and when Wycombe put the ball forward, simply steps out from behind the striker, intercepts it, and plays the ball to a red shirt. Imagine. (Sometimes even FORWARD!) Suspend your disbelief. O’Connell meantime made two super blocks to prevent certain Chairboys’ goals. (Beaten by ‘Chairboys’. Can it get any worse?) And the fullbacks won’t be as bad as the first half...will they?

Then there’s the dynamic duo in midfield. Captain Marvel and the GOAT. The GOAT’s PR team appear to be on sabbatical, cos I’m reading quite a few negative comments ‘on socials’ these days. Do these people have no idea? How do you criticize a player who rarely leaves the centre circle, can’t pass a ball forward, and constantly loses his man? The goal is a case in point. Watson has pushed up, marking another Wanderer, while a different wanderer wanders away from Bland and is free down their left. The cross is slightly deflected, which bamboozles Captain Marvel (not difficult) and a 3rd Wanderer lashes it into the top corner from the edge of the box. Otherwise the GOAT’s one attempt at emulating POTY Kelly in running forward and passing the ball ends up with it being overhit for Cleary. (I’m still trying to digest how Kelly has critics for not being able to fire it into the top corner after bursting past several opponents, getting to the edge of their box, then laying it off to a red. Yes, I mean you, P. Waddington.)

Where was I? I’m dizzier than a rascal. Captain Marvel. One advantage of hanging out with Darrell, pre-match (and half-time, and full-time) is that I don’t need to say owt about Luca, Darrell says it for me. And my silence only makes him rant more, as he thinks I’m a fan. It’s beautiful. Tonite, El Capitan is lucky not to give away a penalty as he drags a Chairboy to the floor on the backpost, with half-time looming. It’s funny, but I never hear the Jonesys (Jonesies?) and Farnhams of this world complain about the ref when they fail to give a blatant penalty to the opposition. (Maybe it would have woken Coach Conor up, going into the interval a goal down. Or maybe not.) Otherwise, he does what Connell does. Slows it down, kicks it square, makes no runs (with the ball), hit and hope longballs, gentle dinks for deadballs. If it wasn’t for his pal the GOAT next to him, I’d say he was one of the most limited players I’ve seen since…Herbie Kane? That’s it! He’s just a skinny Herbie Kane. (I’ll work on the exact wording of the chant.)

The pair of them together? CRAP.

Onwards and upwards!

*** Crapman. Top 3 is really tough. I think you could juggle any of McG, MdG, O’Connell and Crapman, in any order whatsoever. But given his trials and tribulations, I’ll give it to Crapman. Didn’t put a hand or foot wrong, and had no chance with the goal.
** McGoldrick. How comes grandad can run, but the whippersnappers CAN’T? Our only hope.
* MdG. Woulda been my MOTM but for a couple of ‘head like a 50 pence piece’ clearances in the 2nd half. But it’s nice to have a footballer at centre half.

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. McGoldrick 2. MdG 3. Goodman

Despatches:
I read somewhere that we were bound to mess up tonite cos ‘we’d not won 2 games in a row all season’. That’s quite impressive, considering I know we won 3 and drew 1 of our opening 4 games. But we are consistently inconsistent, I’ll give us that. Still, if we win our 3 games in hand...etc etc

As for Lynne describing it as ‘Directionless, Clueless, Rudderless, Spineless...Just like our politicians’...it got me thinking. Would she prefer a centre back partnership of The Donald and Our Nige? Though Putin is a renowned left footer, and Coach Conor prefers a bit of balance in the middle (if not the outer edges of the party...sorry, team). Sadly, whichever Kim is in charge of North Korea this week is unavailable, due to injury. ‘Carrying too much timber’ said a club doctor.

Drink du jour: Vocation Krush Hour at Heaven and Ale.

Away: 194 (8,608). Most remarkable for ‘Barnsley’s a sh*thole, I wanna go home’ chant before we’d even kicked off. They were as quiet as us after that, as befitted our lowest crowd of the season (lge only).

The Damage:
£7 petrol
= £7

Huddersfield Town 2-1 BFC, Saturday 21st February 2026

’He’s a f***ing billionaire, the ba*tard.’

Coach Conor has been in charge of the Super Reds 50 games now. 100 conceded. That’s 2 a game. Even accounting for the odd clean sheet, other games make up for it. Whatthehell is the matter with our defence? Don’t ask Adie Moses, on co-comms for Radio Sheffield, asked for his thoughts on Praise or Grumble. I’d have to question the logic of employing a former centre half as a pundit on his former team(s) if he can’t put his finger on what’s wrong. ‘Even when we’re in control and in no danger we manage to concede 2’. (I paraphrase. I’m not going back to listen to it again.) But that’s it. Even in a game where we’re under little pressure, we concede another 2 and chuck away a 1st half lead (AGAIN. But that’s another topic).

Hang on tho, didn’t Coach Conor lay out his cards at the start of the season? We’re going 4-4-2, none of that 3-5-2, all wingbacks and pointless extra centre halves (cos they couldn’t stop conceding either). No, we’ll shore up the fullback positions. And it looked ok early on, Watson at right back, Ogbeta left. 10 pts in the opening 4 games, and we’re a McGoldrick chance away from taking the lead at Wimbledon in the 5th. Then the defensive rot set in.

Fast forward 6 months. O’Keeffe, who can’t defend, has been sent back from his loan spell at Stockport and is now right fullback in a 442. Today’s lamb to the slaughter at left back was Gent…who gets done twice in the opening 10 minutes and is eventually hauled for a right back (Watson) who covers himself in no glory at all when he comes on. Then there’s the central two. So much for adding experience and organizational skills. The hapless Roberts has been dropped again (for O’Connell). The Kitchen Fitter gets his usual appearance though, and if I was dropping anybody, I’d start with him.

Their equaliser, a gentle chip into what I will call the Bermuda Triangle (that area inbetwixt the keeper and 2 centre halves, where the ball disappears in terms of our defence). A Terrier runs on and has an unopposed header into our goal from 6 yards out, middle of the goal. A couple of things here, Adie. 1. When the cross is chipped in, our keeper is closer to where the ball lands than their goalscorer and 2. Didzy (!?) is the one who doesn’t track the goalscorer. Oh, and 3. Shepherd and O’Connell are marking the same player (Note: not the goalscorer.) If one of this idiot pair (and this one’s on Shepherd, trotting up behind O’Connell to mark the same bod) held their position instead of getting sucked out of the Bermuda Triangle, the goal would could have been averted. So there’s 3 things that coulda been done better right there. Didzy tracks his man, the keeper comes out and claims, Shepherd stands his position. I’ll throw in a bonus 4th. Does O’Keeffe even TRY to stop the ball coming in? What do you think?

All that hard work, 1st half, gone in an instant. Of course there was only one winner form now on, and even then it wasn’t through constant Town pressure and brilliant creative play. No, we half clear our lines, but we leave TWO players free out on their right (Cleary having left his man). Kelly sprints over, but Watson is marking someone (‘Oh no he isn’t’ – see goalscorer). Shouldn’t he be leaving that player to his centre halves (who’re marking nobody, btw)? The ball is played out wide, knocked in low to the front post and it’s 2-1. So, Adie, are you telling me there’s nothing that can be improved upon from a defensive set-up? It is a horror show.

We endure another massive scare, Crapman coming off his line to claim a corner…and deflecting it into the mixer for a Terrier to turn goalwards, the shot coming off Crapman’s face before Kelly clears off the line. (I am using the benefit of a TV replay here, we couldn’t tell what was going on from the other end.) No wonder he doesn’t like to come out, he’s a calamity. We also survive a clean through after Captain Almost-as-Calamitous gives the ball away for them to break. Was Watson out of position? Only if he’s presuming Connell is going to pass it to a Reds player. (So, yes, out of position.)

I’d like to think I’m a solutions kinda guy (where’s that smiley face emoji?) so here’s a few quick fixes off the top of my head:

1. Send Crapman back. Flavell isn’t good enough either, but it’ll save a wage.
2. Invite defensive coach Keogh to find gainful employment elsewhere. Or stick him in with the juniors and promote someone from within. Cos he’s improving nothing.
3. Drop Shepherd. ‘For who though?’ Anybody. MdG would be my choice. I don’t care whether he can kick a ball with his left peg or not. (Luca Connell only has one foot, but it doesn’t stop him playing central midfield. Well, it does...ho ho.) And anyway, Coach Conor doesn’t mind right-footed players at left back…bloody hypocrite.
4. Put Watson at right back, Ogbeta at left back. If not Ogbeta, a traffic cone. Anybody but Watson, Gent or Earl. Who does that leave?

Let’s not forget the positives. We were the better side in the 1st half, had some promising attacks (McGoldrick scoring, as well as having one disallowed for offside). Shepherd headed over a corner. And the goal was SUMPTIOUS, McGoldrick cutting in from the left and curling it into the far top corner from the apex of the box. That’s his 12th, and he’s come into his own since we sold DKD (perennial Wrexham benchee). If only the transfer window was still open, we could sell Wrexham Didzy as well. Mind, one unintended consequence of selling DKD was that Huddersfield’s winner was scored by a bloke on loan from...Wrexham! (I wonder if we bothered trying to negotiate for a Wrexham forward as part of the DKD negotiations, since they’ve got a half a dozen of them doing nowt.)

Onwards and upwards!

*** McGoldrick. Another excellent game (save for the equalizer). Held ball up, found players, tracked back, made clearing headers.
** Kelly. 2nd half, I thought it was Kelly v Huddersfield, to be frank.
* Banks. I know he only played 1st half, but that could be said for virtually everyone.

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. McGoldrick 2. Kelly 3. Banks

Despatches:
Has Crapman created history? Managing to lose both Reds-Hudds derby games in the same season, for different sides, is some achievement. And let’s not forget, he got sent off in the Oakwell edition (we still didn’t keep a clean sheet against 10 men). Where’s the Oakwell Historian when you need him? Dave? DAVE???

Pre-match, I hung out with the Galvins in Parish, Huddersfield’s premier alternative bar. Nice Guy Chris had a spare ticket, so I invited my neighbour, Nice Guy Dan. He enjoyed it. (He’s a Town fan.) ‘Come and have a beer with the Belgians after the match’ said Chris. I did. The Belgians didn’t – they’d found Man City-Newcastle tickets going at 25 quid and were off. Good on ‘em.

I also had the honour of joining the vocal Reds minority, as I was sort of kettled up the aisle when I got in and couldn’t find my row. ‘He left cos you’re s***, he left cos you’re s***, Owen Goodman, he left cos you’re s***.’ I was about to correct one of em (the one who asked if I was lost, as I desperately looked around to see if anyone wasn’t wearing Burberry) but I thought better of it. When I eventually found Wadd, he said the Hudds retorted ‘he left cos he’s s***’…etc That’s what I was gonna say! Further attempts at getting under the Terriers’ skin came back to bite as we heard ‘2-1 to the dog shaggers’. But by then the only chants we had were criticizing the board for being ‘greedy ba*tards’ (is it only 6 mill a year they’re putting in?) and calling for them to sell up. And then we boo the team off. (I’m getting de ja vous. Haven’t we been here before?)

Drink du jour: Vocation Krush Hour at Parish and the Kings Head (post match), Punch Drunk at Slaithwaite’s Sixth Fiend.

Away: 2,336 (19,052). Sellout away end. But why don’t they let us have the whole stand? The ground is 6,000 short of capacity. ‘We dunt want away fans’ a charmless man tells me outside.

The Damage:
£2 bus
£3.50 train
£25 ent
= £30.50

BFC 2-1 Peterborough United, Tuesday 17th February 2026

’Shepherd! DEFEND!’

We live to fight another day. Huddersfield have lost and we’re 8 points from a play-off place, 4 games in hand. Why can’t we just lay down and die, instead of giving false hope for another week? Where would we be if we hadn’t chucked away leads at home to Mansfield (2-0), Wimbledon (2-0) and Northampton (2-1)? And that’s just in the last couple of months. Chuck in losing at home to Port Vale (set adrift on memory bliss) and the worst Rovrum team in years and I’m at a loss to see how we’re still in with a minute chance. And with the kitchen fitter still in the team.

Yes, Conor addresses the defensive sitch by...dropping Roberts for O’Connell. Well, it’s a start. And look! A left footed player at left back. Unfortunately, it’s Gent, who is absolutely awful throughout. Did he really cost 200k? I’ve never seen him have a good game. And then there’s Shepherd. I’m tempted to regurgitate the old line about Odejayi after his winner against Chelsea, ‘he’s finally found his level...it’s the Premiership!’ Cos Shepherd was outstanding against Liverpoo, garbage against everybody else. Tonite, he’s left for dead by a forward before Goodman palms the resultant shot into the path of another Posh player. Nil-one, 21 mins in, and we’re on the rack.

O’Keeffe is also beaten down their left and the ball across is miskicked by their player, who’s lost his marker...the kitchen fitter. Goodman saves a one-on-one, while Posh find the Ponty End from a simple chance 10 yards out. Honestly, P’boro should have been out of sight by half-time.

In reply, we’ve had 2 chances. McGoldrick heads over from 6 yards out. Another inch taller and...actually, having seen it on TV, he should have done better. Great cross by O’Keeffe. And we equalize with a quality finish, as Luca cuts inside to curl one into the far corner. Or b) 2 Posh defenders force Luca inside onto the only foot he has. Appalling defending. Don’t Peterboro have scouts? (Maybe they do: ‘You can just let that Connell bloke have a shot, he never does anything.’)

Second half, the game is open, yet chances are at a premium. Neither side has their creative hat on, and Cleary settles it early with a fabulous right footed finish into the far corner. Otherwise, the only entertainment is seeing how bad O’Keeffe and Connell can be at deadballs. And they excel themselves with one, as they take a short one TOGETHER before the inevitable chip to the first defender. Do we still have that set-piece coach who was given all the glory early doors when the likes of DKD was scoring cheeky goals from corners? Cos our deadballs have been crap for about 3 months (and the rest). The best free kick delivery was by some bloke called ‘Banks’...so he wasn’t allowed to have another go.

Gent was dragged after the hour, for a right back (Watson) before the ‘closers’ were sent on, MdG and the GOAT for Phillips and Banks. And as much as I want MdG to do well, first thing he does is let a ball bounce in front of him and put himself in trouble.

Annoyingly, Leyton Orient concede 3 tonite, so although our goals against column has now equalled the previous most-againsters (Donny), we’ve been overtaken (undertaken?) by the eastenders. Come on Shepherd et al – pull yer fingers out!!!!

Onwards and upwards!

*** Connell. I only had to shout at him a couple of times.
** McGoldrick. Class. (Why’ve I got Pulp’s ‘Help the Aged’ earworming me right now?)
* O’Keeffe. Can’t defend (see the Posh chance 1st half) but gets up the field. I’m hard-pushed to say he set up 2 goals, but I think he had the last touch pre-shot.

Official MOTM: Connell

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. McGoldrick 2. Connell 3. O’Keeffe

Despatches:
Stu came up from Retford. And what better break from your doctoral studies (as in ‘studying to be a doctor’) than a trip to Oakwell for daughter Isabelle? We treated ourselves to the Main Stand, cosier…and virtually empty. Where is everyone tonite? Well, Jonesy is skiing in America and Molly is not skiing in Wombwell, so there’s 2 ST-holders missing. Diane won’t drive from Newcastle in the dark (bless) while 1,000+ others probably have similar excuses. (‘The ice skating is on.’) At least Nozzer turned out. (Well, he turned out to the pub. Where did he disappear to afterwards?)

I thought the atmosphere, dead as it was, was a bit better than normal. Little Drummer Boy was tubthumping, and 50 or so of the Ponty joined in intermittently. Perhaps this is every game, I just can’t hear them above the East Stand chunter? Well, I said it was dead...

Drink du jour: Bini Chairman Miaow NEPA at Heaven and Ale. Beer of the season (so far).

Away: 512 (9,257).

The Damage:
c.£7 petrol
= c.£7

BFC 3-3 Wimbledon, Saturday 14th February 2026

’14 minutes without a goal. I’m getting bored now.’

I read yesterday that one of Coach Conor’s comments after the match on Satdy was that we ST holders are getting value for our money, what with all the goals going in. ‘ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED!!??’ Well, actually, not really. At least not for the last 80 or so minutes, as we chuck away a 2-0 lead in our own inevitable, excruciating, way. Does he have a point though? We are 4th top scorers (with 3 or 4 games in hand on the others – nearly typed ‘otters’ there...tho I bet they’d bag the odd one as well). And only one team has conceded more – Doncaster Rovers, no less (and we’ve 2 games in hand to overtake (undertake?) them.

Yes, it’s thrill a minute. Ride the back 4 rollercoaster! Which one though? Is it ‘Nemesis’ you fancy (any opposing forward)? Or ‘Oblivion’ (where we’re headed)? Or ‘The Big One’ (which defensive error tops the rest)? It’s getting ridiculous now. We’re beyond experimentation, though here’s a thought, Conor: play MdG centre half instead of ANY of the clowns you keep picking. At least he can control a ball, read a game, look up, bring it into space. Admittedly, he’s not perfect either (not dominating enough, but neither are the 2 centre backs he loves picking). You cannot, you simply CANNOT keep picking Shepherd. Or Roberts. Or Shepherd and Roberts. Individually, they are the worst centre halves in the division, collectively they are the worst partnership I have ever seen for the Super Reds. (Admittedly, this is only 46 years, but I have it on good terms that even in division 4 our centre halves weren’t this bad. We had Eric Winstanley and Pat Howard FFS.)

It’s just not funny anymore. And anyone who says ‘well, it’s not Conor’s fault, it’s what he’s been lumbered with’...he’s still picking Shepherd over others, and one (alleged) centre half he brought in – Jake Rooney – was so bad he couldn’t get a game and is now on loan at National League North Boston United (conceding 3 at Scunthorpe on Satdy, though he did score 2 himself). Last time we scored and conceded at will was under Bassett. Long ball, defences stretched, 4 on 4 everytime either side got the ball, Chettle centre half. Seems like halcyon days now, a mere 67 conceded in the league (80 odd scored – we had Hignett). I know he’s now brought another bloke in, O’Connell (not to be mixed up with Brendan, or that crap midfielder Conor persists with). He looks the best centre half we’ve got, so he’s on the bench today. Brilliant.

Back to the plot. We’re 2-0 up against a middling 3rd division side. A harmless looking cross comes in. Roberts GAWPS at it while some pesky forward STANDS MOTIONLESS and still gets in front of Roberts, backpeddling like the clumsy oaf he is. WHY DOES HE GET PICKED? Apart from a month last season he has continually been embarrassed and embarrassing. He should be put out to grass with Shanks’ pony. (And nobody can say I haven’t been consistent in my opinion about him. He is absolute rubbish. Part of the problem – apart from HIM – is that teams don’t simply hoof balls up to the centre forward anymore, so he’s redundant apart from when he’s needed.) Mind, it’s not his fault Coach Conor has him trying to control balls and passing it out. That’s on the coach, not his donkey.

The equalizer is a good old fashioned team effort. Tennai Watson (right back at left back...who’s to blame for THAT!?) backs off and backs off, allowing their attacker to skew a shot across face of goal for the centre forward to head in from 6 yards IN THE MIDDLE OF THE GOAL. Say what you like about how the ball went there, it’s INBETWEEN Shepherd and Roberts, the worst centre back pairing of all-time. The WOAT. The absolute WOAT. We’re not even half an hour in and we’ve relinquished a two goal lead. That’s pretty exceptional, even for us. (We’d gone two up with tap-ins for 38 year old McG and and the young stripling of 33, Bradshaw, making his latest home debut.) Two bits of magic from Cleary before he went AWOL*.

*I realised the other day that whether you have permission or not to go somewhere, they’re both ‘AWOL’ (with/without). Fancy!

Coach Conor rings the changes at half time on the hour, game going nowhere. What it needs is the GOAT bringing on, for Bradshaw. How comes the GOAT can’t get a game? (I can tell you. Cos he doesn’t do anything.) Oh, he gets booked. And he did again, for the 9th time in the league this season. Does he get games out for 10? Hope so! An unnamed Londontyke claims Bland’s yellow is unlucky. What? Unlucky the ref knows the rules? He ran in front of the ball as their guy was taking a free kick. (Bland is now the 4th most ill-disciplined player in the 3rd division – Connell and Shepherd are also in the Top 10) and it doesn’t even take in to account his red card in a cup game.

Phillips is also on, for Cleary. How can Phillips not get a game for a side this average? I’ll be generous and put it down to Coach Conor going all out attack, 2 centre forwards and 2 wingers. (It’ll never catch on.) The changes have an effect too. Wimbledon go 3-2 up, another bit of comical defending from Shepherd. I’ve seen this before this season too (Mansfield home?) The ball is clipped forward and their player knocks it past Shepherd, who is still moving forward as the ball is past him. He is simply unable to turn. At least this time said attacker doesn’t score, instead squaring it for the open goal (as Yoganathan didn’t do the other week when drilling it wide.)

We’re now staring down the barrel at defeat. Fans are heading for the exits. One final gamble. Take Roberts off, put O’Connell on. At least he can carry a ball 20 or 30 yards forward without tripping over. And it works. I think by now we’ve gone to a flat back 2 (O’Connell, Shepherd) and everyone else is up the pitch. O’Keeffe drives in, lays it to McG (I’m still not having any of that ’Didzy’, he’s not my mate) who shoots. The keeper saves, but here he comes...here he comes...loanee Banks follows up to score. That’s one decent signing Conor / the board has made. But do we get him for keeps? (Not if his agent is worth his salt.)
Happy Valentine’s Day! Love you!

Onwards and upwards!

*** McGoldrick. A 38 year old showing others how to run around.
** Banks. Made some great moves, got crosses in, and scored.
* O’Keeffe. As long as he’s not being asked to defend (and he obviously isn’t) he’s not bad. Lots of energy, wants to drive forward.

Official MOTM: McGoldrick

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. McGoldrick 2. Banks 3. O’Keeffe

Despatches:
I thought POTY Kelly had a quiet game, though he made one lung busting run late on, 40 yards, and STILL had the wherewithawal to lay it off to McG. (Note: I think he was held back by Coach Conor. Someone had to stand next to Connell on the halfway line, with the GOAT benched.)

Keeper Goodman didn’t make any mistakes, while simultaneously not getting anywhere near their goals. I didn’t notice Watson beyond their opener, but (here we go again) right back IS not the same as left back. Who are these managers who think otherwise?

Shepherd this week admitted to being ‘embarrassed’ at being part of a Reds defence conceding so many goals. It didn’t help though, did it? Listen, Jack, no need to be embarrassed. The embarrassment is on the coach. It’s not your fault he picks you. You’re simply not up to the level and no amount of coaching can change that. Fair enough. It baffles the hell out of me that Coach Conor thinks you’re a better addition to the defence than MdG, but I have to think he believes it. His job depends on it. And who’s to argue? I am. We’re about to have the highest number of goals against in the division, and he’s picked you 27 games in 28. It is axiomatic that we will concede goals while Shepherd is one of the centre halves. (And, yes, I’ve learnt a new word this week, while watching the Winter Olympics of all things. I think it was one of that mad pair who commentate on the snowboarding. They’re great.) We’ve conceded 96 goals in Coach Conor’s 48 matches. (Credit to the pair of Twitter accounts I read these 2 facts.) They look and sound right, but I’ve got better things to do than double check. Like breathe. Roberts? We didn’t even get one of his long throws to the opposition.

Connell’s main contribution appeared to be in rivalling O’Keeffe for who could take a worse deadball. You’d think Coach Conor, who COULD deliver a ball, must be tearing his hair out, but no, he keeps going with these 2. If it’s on the right, let Connell take it, and vice versa. There MUST be someone on the pitch who can kick a football from still? Must be. Still, nice catching practice for whoever’s in goal.

Cleary and Bradshaw both disappeared after 10 minutes (though I’m not sure Bradshaw ever appeared). Still, at least the latter knows where the goal is. I know it was only a tap-in, but with a supply, he’ll score. As for Cleary, sets up two but otherwise looked like he needed a break. Give him a week off (at least) and play that ex-Darlo and Boro winger we’ve just signed.

The atmosphere? 2 nil up and all I could hear was the dull thud of a drum. We used to have nobody chanting. Now we have no-one chanting while a drum beats. Progress. (It didn’t last, the little drummer boy going missing between about the 10th and 80th minutes. Where did he go? What did he do?)

That was the worst three-all draw I’ve ever seen.

Drink du jour: Beartown Inception in Spiral City.

Away: 472 (9,640).

The Damage:
c.£7 petrol
= c.£7