Bohemians 1905 1-1 Zbrojovka Brno, Saturday 25th February 2023

Bohemians 1905 1-1 Zbrojovka Brno, Czech Liga, Dolicek, att. 4,079

I came to the attention of the ultras today, and not in a nice way. It was the second half, and I’d decided to stand on the terrace behind the goal. Heading for the more sparsely populated far side, I walked along the front and behind their cheerleader’s platform. Then, as I stood on the terrace, minding my business, supping my beer, watching the football….a yoof came up to me. ‘LGBT’ he said. I wasn’t sure whether this was a statement or question, but I knew what he was referring to. He pointed at my hat and repeated ‘LGBT’. ‘It’s a very colourful hat’ I replied, ingenuously. ‘That’s my football team’ I added, pointing at the club badge.

I wasn’t too fazed, as he’d broken the rule of combat and ceded higher ground (I was a couple of steps above him). I also overly trust my ability to avoid confrontation, or as my mate Dave says ‘you’re the only person I know who can talk himself into and out of a fight in the same sentence.’ Then his mate came and joined him. This one was dressed in all black, his face disguised by a scarf across his face, hoodie and sunglasses. Perhaps he’s famous and doesn’t want to be recognised? An older, and, crucially, BIGGER bloke stepped in to discuss matters with them in Czech. After a minute or so, the 1st lad asks me if ‘in the interests of keeping the peace would you mind removing your hat.’ It was so terribly formal I said ‘no bother, it’s not too cold’ whereupon his disguised accomplice was now insistent that I keep it on. ‘I can’t win’ I replied. Anyway, I took it off and enjoyed repartee with big bloke’s mate for the rest of the match, a Chemistry graduate from the provinces who’d adopted Bohemians. ‘I’m surprised and shocked’ he said. ‘I thought young people had more…respect.’

I’d got to Dolicek bang on kick-off time, as I messed up and went the wrong way on the tram. So much for reading the timetable. Thus, with no time to spare I paid the 300CHK for a seating ticket and went in the 1st entrance. The stand may not be too photogenic, but it provides an excellent view, as it’s quite steep. I sat about 6 rows up, but the view was still good as the stand begins at a height. To the right, behind the goal, there are no spectators, but a portacabin and cameraman up high. Opposite is the away ‘end’, 2 or 3 rows of open seating, with maybe 100 away fans today. Space is extremely tight on that side as the street lies immediately behind. That leaves the far (left) end, a large terrace with some seats bolted on the left side (which no-one sits down on). This is where the vocal element converge, though there were a few call-and-response chants from the main stand.

The first half was notable for a couple of disallowed goals. Bohemians thought they’d gone a goal up with a neat turn and shot off the far post. My chemist told me it was ruled out for handball. Who knew the Czech league had VAR? Like everywhere else, it wished it hadn’t for the 2nd disallowed goal…an absolute rocket from 25 yards by the Brno left back, which screamed into the top corner. I’ve heard a rumour VAR decided it was offside. Maybe there was a player standing ‘off’. Was he obstructing the keeper? There wasn’t a goalkeeper in the world saving that shot. Ho hum.

At half-time I visited the club shop…they had great t-shirts last time I was here…then a klobasa (sausage) and beer. I’d been eying up a ‘cigaro’, a foot long baguette with sausage, but they ran out just I should have been served. I say ‘should have been’ as 3 Glasweigans somehow inveigled their way in front of me by pushing in from the side. They seemed to want a ‘cigaro’ too, so justice was served (unlike the cigaro). Then a cheer went up. Great. Bohemians were a goal ahead. VAR didn’t rule this one out for nefarious reasons. Then I decided to go behind the goal, which I probably would have done to begin with had I arrived in good time. I did see one goal though. Brno equalised in the 70th minute and neither side looked likely to get another. Full-time came, we said our goodbyes…and a man came down several steps to shake my hand. Was it for wearing my rainbow hat? Coming to support Bohemians? Being English? He never said. He just shook my hand and returned to the throng of leavers.

The Damage:
CHK 300 ent
CHK 50 programme
CHK 45 beer (x2)
CHK 70 klobasa (sausage)
CHK 349 t-shirt= CHK 859 (£34)

The Tunes:
Prague life, the humdrum of the streets and tram.

Pribram 2-0 Ceske Budejovice, Saturday 10th August 2019

Pribram 2-0 Ceske Budejovice, Czech Liga, att. 3,186 (Energon Arena)

Welcome to....

About an hour and a half from Prague (one change), this top division spectacle had a rustic feel to it.  Pribram was proper countryside, a small town spread out over several kilometres.  The walk from the station to the stadium was a couple of miles (thank you Googlemaps!)  I did pass a mining museum (sadly no time, etc) and 2 or 3 bars all promising they’d open at 4pm (they hadn’t at 7pm, on my return journey).

A walk through rural Pribram.

But what I’ll mainly remember of this match came after full-time, when an away fan, having left the stadium, re-entered through the home section, walked up the steps of the stand and lamped a home fan in the face; granted, the latter may have been goading the away contingent following a home victory, but the visitors, meathead to a man, all 50 of them, wearing black and making up in girth what they lacked in hair, did not look the ‘banter’ type.

So, where were the police?  Well, there were plenty in the home stand where I was, standing about, dawdling.  But where the home and away fans met (as the majority of home fans left at this end)…zilch.  

Eastern Europe, yesterday.

Anyway, the fella didn’t go down, despite ceding years and weight to this Ceske hoodlum, who simply walked away, back to his brethren.  Figuring that was that, I went to the loo.  On coming out, there were riot police everywhere (the Czechs love a balaclava and what looked like a rifle to fire tear gas).  What could have been proactive had become reactive.  Two people lay on the floor, one being my ‘victim’ (had he been attacked again, or was it a delayed reaction to the initial punch?)  The other guy, trussed up like a turkey, with his nose to the floor, wasn’t the first assailant.  I asked two policemen if they spoke English.  ‘No’ each said, tersely.  (Have you ever met a polite balaclava’d cop?)

Police have one guy cuffed...

I stuck around for a while.  The victim occasionally wanted to sit up, but a policeman told him to stay in the recovery position.  Later, said policeman covered him with a foil blanket, to stay warm.  It had been raining…and why was he only wearing one shoe now?  (Probably thrown into the adjacent stream by a Ceske fan, I shouldn’t wonder.)

Not the kind of sight you come to football for.

Eventually, an ambulance arrived and the victim did manage to climb in himself, slowly.  In the meantime, a 50 year old black-shirted bald guy of some heft with ‘ACAB’ emblazoned across his front, argued demonstrably with some uncommunicative law enforcement officer.  Let’s just say the officer somehow resisted the temptation to beat the s*** out of him.

There's any amount of police AFTER the event.

This all pails beside the tranquil setting of the stadium.  Two covered stands flanked either side of the pitch, while an open ‘scaffolding stand’ (like at Gillingham) lay behind the goal nearest the entrance.  Today, this stand would only house away fans, as home fans eschewed their sector for protection from the rain.

Behind the other goal lay the curve of a former athletics track, while a building on its outer edge housed the changing rooms.  I’ve never seen a more understated entrance, as the players came out of a door and walked 50 yards to the pitch.  It was like a scene from Sunday league.

The players emerge from the dressing rooms.

To their right were the Pribram ultras – all 20 of them.  This wasn’t a place to make noise.  It’s a place to chunter and wonder how Pribram are in the top division.  Dynamo’s 50 made some noise though; it’s a long way to come not to. 

In the end, the hosts won comfortably, 2-0.  I really enjoyed the second, as the forward ran at the last defender, put the ball one way past him, then ran the other, before finishing.  Quality.

Full-time - now let the action begin.

The Damage:

CHK 100 ent
CHK 60 klobasa (x2)
CHK 35 beer (x3)

= CHK 325 (£11)

The Tunes:
Cypress Hill III: Temples of Boom (Cypress Hill)
Ill Communication (Beastie Boys)
Let England Shake (PJ Harvey)
Polymer (Plaid)

Stayed at:
Hostel Boudnik, Prague (£25 – two nights)

Na Litavce panorama

Looking towards the away end.

An uninspiring entrance.

The side of the stand.

The fire brigade.

The building housing the dressing rooms.

The Ceske end.

The teams come out.

The teams line up.

Pribram 'ultras' (!)

Great angles under the stand.  

The view from the near end.

There are SOME people here.

A fine selection of sausages.

Everything you need: ambulance, sausage, beer (right hand hut).

Dynamo coach.

The view from behind the goal.

The penguins are huddled up, out of the rain.

The sun makes a rare appearance.

Executive boxes, Pribram-style.

Ceske banner.

Those angles again.

A filthy day over Pribram.