BFC 1-2 Shrewsbury Town, Saturday 26th April 2026

‘Embarrassing.’

THANK GOD THAT’S ALL OVER. Another season of absolute woeful underachievement at Fortress Oakwell in Division 3. Did we save the worst till last? Certainly the worst scoreline, losing to bottom of the table and already relegated Shrewsbury Town, and quite deserved in my humble opinion. (My opinion is never humble. It is correct.) They were without a win in 15 (4 draws) but, like Mansfield (without a win in 14 till they played us) turned us over with comparative ease.

Coach Conor’s selection shuffle this week has Cotter in, playing left midfield. Of course he is. And he’s probably our most dangerous player, as he curls in two magnificent crosses for nobody to get on the end of, as well as smashing one off the post towards half-time, and skewing another one wide, off balance. Still, he has to cut inside for said crosses, cos GUESS WHAT? He’s right footed. We can’t utilise his pace and get him to whip a ball in with his left foot COS HE CAN’T. 2nd half, he plays down our right, so anyway, I can’t complain, we had a whole Bazza in front of us on the east side this match (we attacked the Ponty 1st half).

Was it a back 4, 1st half? Bland, Roberts, MdG and Earl. Where was Lambrusco playing? Floating around Bland, somewhere. Connell retained his place, as the lynchpin of the side (of course he did) with Phillips, DKD and Russell floating around in attack. We have an early let-off, as the Shrews have one chalked off for offside. A backpost tap-in, the scorer had no excuse, he could see all along the line. Careless. I think they go ahead while I’m still enjoying this failure.

Earl is outthought and outfought as he allows a crossfield ball to find their winger, who, sensing Earl is too close, knocks it past him, runs onto it (via a half-hearted tussle) before laying it across goal for another simple tap-in. It is so EASY. Why don’t we do what every other defender in the land does, and simply obstruct the runner? Didn’t Earl concede the same goal at Stockport? Is he simply incapable of turning and running? (That’s rhetorical, don’t bother riling me with a reply.) ‘How s*** must you be, we’re winning away’ is the chant from the away end. Very.

Our best chance meantime falls to Roberts, somewhere around the penalty spot and he carefully sidefoots it over the bar. Cotter also has a penalty appeal turned down, as is tradition. Was he caught? Did he dive? Does he fall over wrongly? I don’t know. I know HE thought it was a pen. He’d certainly skinned their player. And then there was the rasper from Connell, expertly tipped over by the goalkeeper for a goalkick. (Everyone in the ground bar the ref saw the save. Oh well.)

Another stern half-time talking to brings the Reds out...exactly the same. Is this a friendly? I expect more from the Gleeson Homes v Shropshire Homes rivalry (the shirt sponsors, if you weren’t there, and, let’s be honest, not many of you were). Max Watters has come on for Lambrini. Excellent! We were missing someone useless up front. The Hapless One manages to head a ball BACKWARDS from a 3 yards out open goal (trying to snap up a rebound after a Phillips shot). He’s not crap, he’s just a very naughty boy.

Gauci manages a wonder save from a corner before the worst team in the division go two goals up. (I mean Shrewsbury, not us, although...) We thought we’d cleared the corner (we had!) but they regain possession on the halfway line and one of them Shrews (difficult to see, bearing in mind their size) has the temerity to make a run behind Roberts, who’s obviously still congratulating himself on the defensive header. The Nocturnal One (shrews are norturnal, right? Otherwise this doesn’t work) runs onto it and has the simple task of squaring it for another tap-in. Have a look at the TV replay – Roberts simply has NO CLUE about the run-in behind him.

And there it is, game over, season over, but 23 more minutes to endure. (Please don’t add any injury time.) Russell tries to make it interesting, coolly slotting in a scramble, but it’s too little, too late. The ref adds 4 mins at the end, enough time for sub Nwakali to drag one wide. After that, I’m off. Technically, before the final whistle (tho it’s due). I just can’t be there to witness whatever doesn’t come next. No pitch invasion, (I heard), an 85th minute PA warning telling us we’d get be prosecuted altered a minute later to say ‘probably.’ If I was in the lower tier, I’d have been tempted to test them. What is there to lose?

Onwards and upwards!

*** Cotter. Got forward, hit the post, delivered at least 2 peachy crosses into the box (nobody there), and had possibly the worst shot this season (a 25 yarder skewed high and wide into the away end.*
** Russell. Like DKD, looks better the more the team gets worse.
* DKD. Not one, not two, but THREE dummies. To go with the other 10 in our team. (Problem with DKD dummying it for another Red is that the ball goes to another Red, rather than DKD. He hasn’t thought this one through.)

*is it the away end if there’s no away fans there? (The Shrews were the other side of the netting.)

Official MOTM: Bland.

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. Cotter 2= Bland / Russell

Despatches:
In a clear case of nominative determinism, Bland had a particularly dull game (so he was named MOTM, to mystified reaction from the East Upper). With nothing better to do, I spent the second half particularly eagle-eyeing our latest right back. I think he spent the entire 45 on the halfway line, receiving a ball, being faced down by a member of the opposition, then squaring it 8 yards or backwards to a free Red. Never once taking a risk, never once going forward. Yet even some Londontykes felt him worthy of a top 3 position. Did we also not concede 2 (couda been more) against the WORST side in the division? What was I missing? No, seriously, what was I missing?

Maybe I’m just in a bad mood. Terrible match, lacklustre season. Roberts and Hourihane were both interviewed on Radio Sheffield and mentioned the ‘E’ word. I’d add an ‘S’ word (not that one). Shambles. We entered January in the top 4 needing to strengthen up front. Any centre forward would do – he’d have to be better than Max Watters. We got Clement Rodrigues. The defence? Nobody commands the area, let alone organises the others into a cohesive unit. Isn’t that why we got Roberts back? Bit of experience? Meantime, we replace Cadden with a Gent and the lesson costs us 200k and makes us WORSE on the left. Other losses include Herbie Kane (replaced by the equally immobile Connell, who himself is replace further up by Russell, one of the few success stories.) Some might also argue we missed Devante Cole up front. Did he score 1 or 2 after January last season? (It’s still 1 or 2, by the way, arf arf.) No, our main problem is players who were here last season have underachieved. Phillips, MdG, O’Keeffe, Connell...etc etc. You know it’s bad when our main source of entertainment (and not in an ironic way) is Barry Cotter. And thank goodness for DKD. It was nice of him to pop in this season on the way to somewhere better. Good luck, Davis. Or is it Keilor!?

Oh, and it’s 28 years to the day that we celebrated promotion to the Prem. ’We’re so far away from that, it’s untrue’. Hourihane got that right, at least.

Drink du jour: North Atlantis session IPA in Spiral. Very nice.

Away: 379 (today’s ‘pretendance’ – thanks Kieron Maguire on ‘The Price of Football - 11,159). Well done for the turnout, though to those chanting ‘Barnsley’s a sh*thole, I wanna go home’ I’ve good news: you won’t have to come next season, you’re in a different division.

The Damage:
c.£7 petrol
£4 prog
= £11

*Still not feeling great, I’d planned on getting the train in. Engineering works meant rail replacements and, not feeling well, the last thing I needed was rail replacement buses.

BFC 3-0 Shrewsbury Town, Tuesday 24th October 2023

‘How s*** must you be, we’re winning at home!’

I’m getting the sweats. It’s like that time last season when the car was running out of oil. Only this time, I have a slow puncture. How slow? I dunno, but I fill up with air before we set off and I stop at Wetherby for more. What do you call tyre pressure? (Looks it up.) PSI. Whatthehell is ‘PSI’? Anyway, it’s gone down from 30 to 24. (Still, it was 8 when a bloke started pointing and shouting at me in Lidl Spennymoor earlier.) It’s fine though, I get there.

After a pre-match pint, we’re hauled to the ground by 11 year old Violet. Maaan...I’m outside the Oakwell Sandwich Shop half an hour before kick-off. Ahhh, to be that thrilled about the prospect of a home game. I remember those days...just. Was everything more thrilling when you were young? Is it better to be bossed around by your mum, or by your other half?

So, I’m in for kick-off. One person who isn’t is my friend Diane, who I’ve given a lift to. She never misses kick-off, but you try getting a bus from Barugh Green. And history is made as she misses her first ever goal at Oakwell, as she’s sticking her head down a toilet to be sick. I text her. ‘Penalty’...but she’s busy. We have not been awarded a home penalty since March 2021 (the BBC website tells me). Surely not. How can a team who’ve scored more than any other in the league in the past year not be awarded a penalty? (Don’t get Jonesy and Farnham started.) Statistically, we are SURELY in the opposition box enough times to be awarded SOMETHING.

And so it is, soft. Cotter hits a shot from the edge of the area and it slams into a bloke 6 yards away. Apparently it’s hit his elbow, but aside from cutting his arm off, I’m not sure where he’s meant to put it. There isn’t a person alive with the reaction to move out of the way of this shot. The ref points, and after a a tete a tete (a tete?) between Kane, Styles and Cole, the former refuses to give up the ball and sends the keeper the wrong way. From being unable to kick a ball forwards the other week, he’s now 2 goals in 2 games. Go Herbie!

It also relinquishes one worry tonite...a card-happy ref. Apparently this one has reffed 9 games this season and dished out 49 yellow cards and 7 reds. And it takes him 3 mins to book his first, as a defender goes right through Cole, albeit in slow motion. Minutes later, Styles is cautioned. (I thought he got the ball.) But the pen sets us up nice and a minute later Cole is breaking free on the right. Does he do a Dire and shoot from an acute angle, or does he square it for the onrushing Styles to have an open net. The pass is perfect and Styles can’t miss. This game is easier than I expected! (Anyone who remembers last season Shrewhousery knows what I mean.)

The rest of the half is keep-ball, as Kane and his mates play constant triangles around a bemused and befuddled opposition. I feel sorry for the Shrews, they look really sad. But they eke in two nil at the break and come out vaguely fighting, 2nd half. That said, subs have started to be made. Phillips is on for Styles at HT. Makes sense. Then, just after the hour, Collins sends on O’Keefe, Dodgson and Watters for Cotter, Cadden and McAtee. He’s taken off 3 players who’ve been playing well...and nothing happens. I hope these don’t score, I’m thinking, before Dodgson turns and plays a reverse pass down the middle of the pitch to Watters, who lays it on for Cole to stride into the box and hit a glorious finish. Great goal, job done. Now, can I get my car back home...

Onwards and upwards!

*** Kane. Ran the first half, by which time we were out of sight.
** Cole. Made all the right runs, pressured the opposition, and got his reward.
* McAtee. Gave the Shrews a lot to think about with his movement.

Official MOTM: Cole

Londontykes’ POTY: 1. Cole 2. De Gevigny 3. Kane

Despatches:
First of all, I’m a little stunned with the stats….we only had 60% possession. Felt like 90 at times. But I did like that the shots on target ratio reflected the possession stats…3-2. That means, despite our dominance, we had THREE shots on target, and scored with every one. This will not happen every week. We need to get more shots off…though at two nil, it felt like we were trying to demoralise them and hope the breaks would come later.

There were several excellent performance. I know folk were raving about The Frenchman. He looks to be able to read the game, and, like several other top drawer defenders we’ve had of late (Pinnock, Helik, Mads) likes to step out and intercept the ball, ready to start a counter attack. But I thought Jordan Williams stole the show in defence. I don’t think anyone beat him all nite and he was there under the bar as the ball bounced around asking to be knocked in. I missed this, but it wasn’t our usual keeper. Kilip was in and had nought to do. (I remember one of the shots he saved, a gentle 20 yarder into his midriff.) Russell looked assured in midfield. Lost possession as often as he broke sweat. Styles was in amongst it and had his best game (half) I’ve seen in a while. Maybe our lower division ‘total football’ suits him. The amount of times you’d see McAtee dropping off...sometimes as far as left back…for Styles to slip into the space behind him, or Cadden to get up the pitch. I get the idea the players have ‘bought in’ to what this manager is attempting to do, being prepared to cover for their mates, make dummy runs, take players out of position. It augurs very well. Not that we’ll have it this easy all season. At one point in the first half, Cole picked the ball up on the halfway line, up against 5 defenders, and nary a Red in sight. That he was allowed to get to the box AND get his shot off, said more about Shrewsbury Town than anything else I saw last nite.

Drink du jour: Leffe with the Galvins in Wetherspoons

Away: 220. ‘Never’ some said. No. ‘Never’ was the overall crowd of 10,859. I wish we’d publish the REAL figure on these midweek games. I’ll go 8,500.

The Damage:
c.£30 petrol
£3.50 air for tyre
= c.£33.50

BFC 2-1 Shrewsbury Town, Monday 10th April 2023

‘You don’t know what you’re doing.’

Wow, that was a strange game. From being two up against a middle of the table middling side, we’re hanging on for dear life, down to 10 men and they’ve pulled one back. How did it come to this? I’d say the key ingredients were a side intent on all kinds of sh*thousery, an incompetent ref, and maybe a sprinkling of naivety from the Super Reds. It certainly wasn’t dull. (If timewasting makes you angry, is it by definition ‘not dull’? I’ll dwell on that.)

Shrewsbury Town. The only team I’ve ever seen timewaste while two goals down. This game broke records for the number of ‘head injuries’ sustained. Every time a Shrew went down, he was clutching his head. Ironic then that it was two of our players (Mads and Kane) who ended up bandaged up. Later, half their team surround Cadden after an innocuous looking tackle leaves their man rolling around. He’s a split second late, FFS, making a genuine attempt at a tackle. Red card it is. A minute later, their manager is mouthing off at the ref again. Seems the man in black can’t please ANYBODY. So he must be doing something right!

In a disjointed opening half, we somehow went in 2 goals to the good. Cadden crosses the ball and the keeper fumbles it into the net. Karma. The PA announcer mistakenly gives it to Cole, but I guess he’s on the wrong side of the pitch to see. Looked Cadden’s all the way to me. Then, 30 seconds after Phillips has found row Z* of the Ponty with a(nother) wayward shot, a centre half shows him how it’s done. Kitching hits it low and hard and Cole snaffles a carbon copy of the tap-in he got in the last home game. He’s a right sniffer! Watters does the best thing he did all game by following up and not stealing it off Devante.

*ok, pedants. Probably row T. You get the idea though.

Done and dusted you’d think. We’ll get into the groove second half and take these to pieces like we did Morecambe. And it shoulda been three as Watters does the impossible…heading it past the keeper on the edge of the box and somehow…somehow…failing to find the net, as a defender gets back while he dawdles. Maybe we had other shots, but by now there’s squabbles going on all over the pitch and the ref is finding his notebook.

There are 15 mins left as Cadden sees red. I still fancy us to go up the other end for a third (a la Cambridge home and away) but not if Mads connects with a stupid challenge as they break. Luckily, he’s so late he misses the Shrew. (They’re tricky little beggars.) On a booking, we’d have been down to 9. Now THAT would have been interesting. They pull one back with a superb dink down the middle for Phillips to head home (proving Cadden’s foul hadn’t broken him). But we aren’t troubled again, until a last second close range stab goes straight to Isted. Good positioning? Lucky? Poor finish? Who cares? The three points are ours, and with Plymouth losing and Ipsh*t drawing, this weekend hasn’t been the disaster it looked. A bit like Jesus, we’ve been crucified Easter Friday and are back from the dead come Monday. It’s what the Reverend Tiverton Preedy woulda wanted.

Onwards and upwards!

*** Goal King Cole. Busy up front, excellent runs, won balls in the air (!)…and held the ball up. Oh, and notched.
** Mads. Reckless challenge aside (see earlier) a tower of dominance.
* Kitching. Reading an article in the Chron, I was unsurprised to find Kitching used to do a bit of boxing. Well I never!

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. Cole 2. Andersen 3. Kitching

Official MOTM: Cadden. A cheeky choice from the match sponsors.

Despatches:
Watters. Bloody useless. How can a bloke so big fail to be able to win a header? Even Cole won a fair few flick-ons Monday. I also saw him lead with his elbow (again) in one slow-mo challenge. Thankfully, that particular Shrew wasn’t bright enough to stand and wait to be hit and go down like the sack of s*** his teammates kept imitating. In the end, they only managed to get us 2 yellow cards (and the red) while they had….SEVEN yellows, including one getting sent off in injury time. I nearly forgot about that, though I can still see his look of amazement and his arms spread out like Cauley Woodrow in his best Christ the Redeemer phase.

Kane was the subject of debate. Was he particularly poor in his passing, or was he giving the ball away trying to make things happen (as opposed to those tidy ‘safe’ passes wot players do). I was in the former camp. We can all kick a ball 6 yards square to someone unmarked. Phillips….was put out of his misery on 64. It’s always nice to see the manager reading my mind, taking off Watters and Phillips for Norwood and Benson for Beds. (Mind, we turned a 2-0 lead into a 2-1 scrape thereafter. Stats, eh!?) Oh, and while Bobby Thomas had another excellent game, his brother Luke’s main input once coming on was to be hacked down while in full flow in their half. If that challenge was worth the yellow it got, and Cadden’s was a red, there is something wrong with this game. Kane too was taken out by a wild challenge on the far touchline, the ball not even in sight of the proponent. Again, a worse ‘tackle’ than the red, but deemed only a yellow. No wonder it all kicked off at full-time, with manager Duff having to intervene to drag our players away.

Drink du jour: A better pint of pale ale in Spiral City. It might have been Acorn.

Away: 514

Today’s take home: Check your play-off final dates carefully! (They’ve changed.)

The Damage:
c. £40 travel (petrol). Up from London.
= £40

BFC 2-1 Shrewsbury Town, Friday 19th April 2019

‘Na na na na na na na na na na na….We’ve got Kiefer Moore, Kiefer Moore, we’ve got Kiefer Moore’

I love Good Fridays.  Much better than Bad Fridays.  And what can be gooder than watching the Super Reds cruise to victory and keep up the 2018-19 promotion campaign?  Course, the result mattered most and it was far from a cruise, as we crawled over the line against a Shrews side with nothing to play for.  Indeed, were it not for an outstanding performance from keeper Davies, we’d have been staring down the barrel of a 10 gauge shotgun.  Call it poor finishing, but 3 times they ran through to shoot unconvincingly.  But best of all was a a 25 yarder into the top corner which Davies somehow tipped over.  The closer he is to the end of his contract, the better he gets (funny that).

An ice cream van in Barnsley with THAT reg?  Surely no coincidence...

But all this is to ignore the real highlight of the match – the return of Kiefer Moore.  Initially ‘ruled out for the season’ after a clash of heads at Gillingham in February, our talisman has returned to provide the final push.  And what a reception!  On he came after the hour mark, 2-1 up, and the scene was set.  He didn’t score, but the buzz, the excitement…the FEELING.  BELIEVE!!!!  (Oh no, I’ve come over all Jose Morais.)

Everyone's favourite #19 is back!

But it could have been so, so different.  An early burst had the Shrews one-on-one and Davies saved, with Pinniloss on the cover clearing off the line.  Then Mowatt goes up the field and curls one with his RIGHT foot from 20 odd yards.  At the time, I thought it was a bit soft, but having seen it on telly it was a great strike and I did their keeper (and Mowatt) a disservice.  The Shrews equalise a few minutes before half time.  A crossfield ball has Pinnock barged over.  Mystifyingly, there’s no free kick and the loose ball is lashed home from 20 yards.  Great strike, to be fair, but the foul was obvious to all but the ref. 

The East Stand v Shrews.

We went in at half-time one-all, thanks to another Davies save and within 10 mins of the restart we were in front, Jacob Brown being Johnny-on-the-spot.  The Shrews had already missed a simple header at the backpost before Magic Mike (Bahre) jinked into the box and pulled the ball back for Brown to smash into the gap at the near post from close in.  He has a scorer’s instinct, Brown (see also: Walsall away).  Maybe we’ll see him yet play up front, his original position.

Otherwise, the Shrews missed another one-on-one (how many does a team need?) while McGeehan hit the bar following a slick move started on our left.  It might even have been Thiam setting it up.  Or was I dreaming?  Anyway, we got out of jail today.  Bigtime.

Onwards and upwards!

A decent away turnout shoulda been celebrating today.

*** Davies.  Wunderbar! from our German-born goalkeeper.

** Mowatt.  Controlled midfield, if not their breaks.  Official MOTM.

* Pinnock.  Not sure how they had chances when Pinnock never looked under threat.

Londontykes' MOTM: 1. Davies  2. Mowatt  3. Pinnock

Despatches:

No idea how anyone but Davies got MOTM.  Of 9 Londontyke voters, 9 voted Davies.  Just saying.

For a change, I went in the Ponty today, and what a game to choose.  Best (Oakwell) atmosphere of the season?  Probably.  There is just that BELIEF, what with Kiefer back, we’re going up.  Momentum is ours.  As St. Etienne sang…’Nothing Can Stop Us Now’ !!!!!!!!  Also, it was a good chance to have a proper look at the murals painted on the concourse walls.  I see BFC have even added a perspex cover, like it was a Banksy or sumfink.  Very impressive, well done.

Oakwell.  The home of Barnsley St. Peter's.

Drink du jour: JD and Coke.

Away: 594

The Damage:
£35 train
£3 prog
= £38

The Tunes:
Heroes to Zeroes (Beta Band)
Until the Hunter (Hope Sandoval and the Warm Inventions)
I Started Out With Nothing and I Still Got Most of it Left (Seasick Steve)
Barbed Wire Kisses (The Jesus and Mary Chain)

Ponty End panorama.

The East and Corner Stands.

Ref, I can see that shirt tug from here!

The sun's out, there's a spring in everyone's step...

The old Main Stand.

You Reds!

The teams come out, 2nd half.

Errrr...Peckham and London are THAT way!