BFC 2-1 Blackpool, Saturday 17th January 2026

‘Autistic child on board.’

What a difference a last minute winner makes. Before then, folk were openly grumbling...as the Reds were crumbling. We’d tossed away a 1st half lead to a goal everyone said ‘was coming’ and Cleary had been subbed for some bloke who struggled for a game at Guiseley (Leo Farrell for non-regulars). Blackpool were pegging us back, our midfield couldn’t get hold of the ball, and the only positive appeared to be the new bloke in goal looking unbeatable save for an outrageous deflection.

THEN IT HAPPENED. We suckered Blackpool, the fools. As they hunted for the winner their 2nd half dominance possibly deserved, they piled forward for a long throw. The defensive header reaches the edge of the box where Kelly, hitherto very quiet, bursts into action, beating a Tangerine, carrying it 60 yards at pace, then laying it off for McG. (I’m still not having any of this ‘Didzy’ nonsense. He’s not my mate). Not having the pace to take it in his stride, he controls it, lets the defender pass him, then does him with one of his trademark stepovers and buries the ball into the far corner. Unimpeachable.

The crowd go wild...and so does Praise or Grumble, which has not one, not two, but three Reds callers going overboard about how amazing we were today. As I said, what a difference a last minute goal makes. In truth, with Cleary and Kelly not reaching previous heights, we were average. But well done the defence, who still had to defend a corner in what was left of injury time.

We went ahead with an absolute GIFT. I thought only our keepers did this? Stand miles out of goal, then give away possession to the centre forward. Didzy (ho ho) controls it and hits it first time from distance with his WRONG foot. Well done him. And well done Bailey Peacock-Farrell, just for having one of my favourite names in football.

At the other end, we have a comedy moment of our own. New signing O’Connell (he’s no Brendan, I’ll say that now) trips over his own feet and gifts them a 2 on 1. The ball is squared and the recipient simply slides it first time into the net from 10 yards. Oh, hang on, what’s he doing? He controls it, takes a touch, cuts back inside some desperate challenge and has his shot well saved. Fair play to Goodman (for it was by he) but once that player has cut inside, there’s only one place that shot is going, though Goodman does good, man, by getting across. He also makes a smart save from a near post drive.

Early second half, we spurn a great chance to extend our lead. Phillips lays it to Kelly who blazes the ball Phillipsesque into the crowd from 12 yards. Did it hit a bobble? Dunno, but Kelly’s not really been on it today.

Another one not on it, so much so he’s hauled at HT is the GOAT, or ‘Accident Waiting To Happen.’ Bland is booked halfway through the 1st half for pulling back their player having been outwitted. Then, before half-time, he chops down a breaking Tangerine. I suspect the ref gives him the benefit of the doubt as the ball bounced around 3 or 4 players on that centre circle (Bland’s natural habitat) before breaking. At least Conor realizes his mistake from earlier this season (leaving GOAT on to be booked a second time). Mind, I thought his replacement, Yoganathan, was dreadful. Couldn’t get hold of it, and when he did, gave it away.

(At this point, I must make mention of 2 super passes from Bland. One was a crossfield ball to Cleary on the left wing, and another was to put O’Keeffe clean through. Naturally, by the time O’Keeffe got his shot off, the defender who was BEHIND him was in front of him to block.)

So there. Kelly missed, and Blackpool took control, helped by some lenient officiating. I thought shirt-pulling was an offence? Presumably only if your name’s Bland. Jonathan Bland. In fact, one such shirt pull DID prevent a break, a la Bland, but it was just outside our box. Too far away to be considered ‘dangerous’? How did we score our winner? Then there’s the challenge on Cleary, clattering him from behind. Not even a free kick. It was grating, but we weren’t playing well. Goodman made a few more regulatory saves before being beaten by ex-Red Fletcher thanks to a deflection.

But well done Reds. Hung in there and nicked it. I heard we’re now 7 pts behind a play-off place with 5 games in hand. That’s incredible. But I refuse to look at a table till we’ve won 2 in a row. What does 1 win do? Take us to ----teenth in the table? Big wow.

Onwards and upwards!

*** McGoldrick. Held onto the ball, played in teammates (lovely flick 1st half to send Cleary away), never stopped working...oh, and bagged 2 superb goals.
** O’Keeffe. Threw in some great challenges on the halfway line and looked to get forward. (I’ll ignore the early aberration where he gets done with a throughball.) If the ball’s in front of him and to be won, he’s got a chance. (On being the official MOTM, a caller to Praise and Grumble asked if his wife chose it!)
* Goodman. Till the winner, I was thinking about making him MOTM. He saved everything, came out and caught or punched. But one thing bothers me…he never seemed to stop anything cleanly, needing 2 goes at most things.

Official MOTM: O’Keeffe (announced before McG’s winner)

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. McGoldrick 2. O’Keeffe 3. Goodman

Despatches:
We were looking remarkably threadbare by the end. Farrell looks like what he is, poor lad, a junior over-promoted. Reminds me of Karl Rose (hopefully without the underage sex). Completely anonymous when he came on, but we had no-one else. Well, not now Conor’s got rid of Russell (who’s now getting rave reviews off Mansfield fans). I had to laugh at the remark that ‘we could only name 6 subs’. How many does a team need? Though this was ours: Flavell, Yoganthan, Gent, Farrell, Barrett and MdG. Still, Connell injured, and DKD ‘ill’ (and definitely NOT sold...as of Saturday, 5pm)...a pensioner is forced to play 90 minutes.

Cleary had a mixed game, thank the Lord. (No-one wants to see him sold). Got into lots of good positions 1st half, but the cross always ended up at the front post, to nobody (like in the Cadden years). Either he needs to put it somewhere else, or someone needs to get on that front post. As for folk blaming him for their equalizer...by keeping it in and kicking it to Ogbeta...well, Ogbeta shoulda done beta!

POTY Kelly was very quiet, save for that miss. Saving his energy for the 94th minute, obviously. In defence, Shepherd had another strong game. That’s 2 in a row. (BTW, who had 13 minutes for the ‘Shepherd Flop’ wins a fiver. Hilariously, now we’re not playing at Anfield, these League 1 refs keep giving him the free kick.) I was intrigued by Conor’s tictacs…when in possession, we’d go to a back 4, Shepherd coming wide left and Ogbeta going into central midfield. O’Connell didn’t make a 2nd mistake, but one was worrying enough. Watson was solid, while Ogbeta wasn’t really used down the wing (see earlier). Was it his fault for the goal? Was he fouled? Dunno. Then there’s Phillips, who, even when he's invisible, still manages to set up Kelly, or blaze a good chance (1st half.)

Drink du jour: Verdant Lightbulb at Spiral City. Where Jude became the ‘lucky’ recipient of not one, but TWO half and half scarves from the Liverpoo game. Great minds think alike, D. Wood.

Away: 860 (10,266). Even the official number of home supporters is now less than 10 thousand. Come on Tykes. LET’S BE ‘AVIN YOU!!!!!!! Or just let us die a slow death.

The Damage:
c.£7 petrol
= c.£7

BFC 0-3 Blackpool, Saturday 8th March 2025

‘Our next best chance of scoring today is Phillips...and he’s not even playing!’

I’m not angry. I’m not even disappointed. I’ve gone beyond that – I’m resigned. Resigned to the fact we’re going nowhere fast (other than down). Resigned that, right now, the club is rotten. The ownership, the management, the recruitment, the players, the fans...it’s awful throughout. The vocal minority are busy blaming the board, and I get it. They’re the ones in control of the purse strings, but without em, we’d be bust. They’re also in control of appointments, and in that respect, Coach Clarke and the Director of Recruitment (what a disaster he is thus far) are their fault too.

The latest embarrassment was the worst of the season, for me. (Reedy still claims Leyton O, but I wasn’t there). On Satdy we were played off the park in BOTH halves by another midtable side who have NOTHING to play for. Yet they ran about, they pressed, they made themselves available, they always looked to the front foot. It was everything we’re not. They coulda (shoulda) been 3 or 4 nil up by half-time. (Others said as many as 6). My favourite miss was when their lad put it wide from 6 yards, with an empty net. The keeper made a diving save too, but mostly, it was just poor misses.

In contrast, we had one effort of any note. Connell chipped a great pass through for Humphreys to control with his chest and...blaze over from 8 yards. OK, the keeper’s in close proximity, but all he has to do is get it on target. Just knock it under the keeper into the open goal, rather than paralyse someone in Row X.

But it’s ok, we’ve made it to half time, goalless. A chance for Coach Clarke to reset. Another inspirational teamtalk, some tactical tweaking, maybe a sub. He sends them out identical. If we had the ball (which we had plenty) we had one tactic: hoof it long behind their fullbacks to…to WHO? Every single time, their fullback turned around and collected, or the centre half came across, and possession was ceded. Or it went down the middle to the keeper. This isn’t a one-off. This IS what amounts to us trying to score a goal*. It was repeatedly tried at Rovrum to slightly better success, as their defenders blatantly didn’t know what to do with the ball, and we eked a penalty out of it. Blackpool’s defenders had us on toast all day. Listen, Coach Clarke, it might be the 3rd division but these players are PROFESSIONALS. (I’m referring to the Blackpool players here.) They will not simply give it back to us in their third. This is not Sunday football. (The lack of any kind of press exacerbates the issue.)

*ok, there’s the ‘hopefully DKD will pick up the ball in the final third, beat a player and curl it home from 20 yards’. But that’s hardly a tactic...is it?

Thus the second half started. It took 11 minutes for Blackpool to score. A Tangerine (capital ‘T’) ran 40 yards unchallenged, before burying it into the bottom corner from 20 yards. Another one that went under Smith’s right hand, a la Charlton. I think I see a weakness. But at the point of shooting, there are FOUR Reds players in close proximity to the shooter and NONE of them are putting in a tackle or block. We have given up.

Will Coach Clarke make a change before or after they score a second? He brings on Nwakali and Benson for Connell and Watters. Does that mean we’re not playing with a centre forward? (Insert hilarious caption here.) Within 3 minutes it’s 0-2. A harmless looking cross to the back post is headed in by former Red Fletcher. At least he didn’t celebrate, but I wouldn’t have minded if he did. How does ONE player get inbetween Farrugia, Conor Barrett and the goalkeeper, to score? (By the way, if we have 5 ‘top class centre halves’ according to our leader, what is Barrett?)

It’s ok tho, cos Coach Clarke brings on Rodrigues for the aforementioned Barrett. A centre forward for a centre half. All out attack, then? Does Rodrigues even touch the ball? (Yes, he does. I distinctly remember him touching the ball. Does he touch it twice? I can’t remember a second time, but he definitely touches it at least once in his 25 minute (plus injury time) trot out.)

By now, we’re trying a different tactic (oh yes!). Nwakali appears to be playing right centre half, and is orchestrating all our possession, which invariable is playing the ball forward through the lines to feet, whereupon a Russell, or someone, would hold it up, lay it off…then that player would lose it. Every time. Did we have a shot?

Another pacey attack for the visitors brings a fine save out of Smith, but the loose ball is gobbled up from close range. What ARE our defenders doing (FYI: O’Keefe, Roberts, McCarthy, Farrugia)? No Earl to blame this week, though Barrett was an able deputy. (As in, I don’t rate either.)

There’s still 17 minutes left, not that 80% of the home end will see it. Once again, we are left with the masochists and idiots. Blackpool fans start chanting ‘You’re so sh*t it’s unbelievable’, gaining a round of applause from the home areas, before a few in the Ponty give it ‘We’re so sh*t it’s unbelievable’.

Onwards and upwards!

*** DKD. I trust his transfer request is already in. Needs to play for someone else next season.
** Russell. Generally kept possession
* Nwakali. Plays the ball FORWARD on the FLOOR to players wearing RED. The novelty of it. Marked down for only being on pitch half an hour.

Official MOTM: DKD.

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. No-one 2. No-one 3. DKD/No-one

Despatches:
Let’s start with the players. O’Keeffe? S***. Farrugia? Hapless. Barrett? Hopeless. McCarthy? Clueless (This is starting to sound like the 7 Dwarves.) Roberts? Crap. Connell? Rubbish. Humphreys? Weak. Watters? Anonymous. Rodrigues? Pathetic. Benson? Actually, didn’t look that bad. Smith? Average. Special mention to Bailey McCann, coming on at 0-3 in the 88th minute. We are now GIVING AWAY appearances. It reminds me of Man U, away, where Coach Clarke sticks in Jalo and Yoganathan – 2 youngsters with little first team pedigree and we’re whacked 7-0 by the worst Manure team in living memory.

This is all poor timing, what with season ticket renewal about to come up. Crap football, poorly performing players, awful signings…and random kick off times. I am worried. The club and I are just hoping that 8,000 people renew out of habit, to help the club, etc...cos if we don’t renew, the club has no budget, we sign even worse (cheap) players, and we disappear for the next 20 years.

I’m saving a rant about our recruitment for another week cos I don’t know where to start. What I will say is that the only decent signing we’ve made in the last 2 windows (DKD) was hardly a scouting masterpiece – anyone who picks up a Sunday paper (remember those?) could see him scoring every other week in division 4.

Oh, and Michael Duff got sacked at Huddersfield yesterday. I’d have him back tomorrow, I really would. This has gone far enough.

And just as I finish writing this, my XG correspondent comes good. 1.31 v 2.76. 1.31? I am gobsmacked. I thought we created as little as we have done all season. That Humphreys miss is doing a lot of lifting, but I wouldn’t have that higher than about 0.4. What did I miss?* What other shots or chances did we possibly have???

*It was a balmy afternoon in the sun. Diane had given away my seat to some juvenile Geordie and I went and sat downstairs with Reedy. Consequently, with little happening on the pitch – for us – my eyelids were given to closing. Did we have a cheeky shot every time I nodded off? I know I fell asleep inbetween the award of a corner, and it being taken. The subsequent crowd groan woke me up. O’Keeffe had delivered yet another awful set piece, low to the first man. It’s bad enough that he can’t defend...

Drink du jour: House Party IPA in Spiral. ‘Home Fans Only’ said a hastily scrawled sign (part of a set of two with TAFKA The Arcade Ale House. (I forget what it’s called these days, but something nowhere near as good.)

Away: 826. They enjoyed themselves.

The Damage:
c.£8 petrol
= c. £8

BFC 0-1 Blackpool, Saturday 30th September 2023

‘I see Disney have a new film out – Herbie goes backwards!’

Should we be worried about this manager? Is it ever too early to be worried about a manager? I’ve not been to a game in over a month (holidays, postponements, re-arranged postponed games coinciding with said holiday...Christ, I was only away for a week!) but we’ve continued where I left off, losing at home. I’ve seen 4 (home) games this season and seen us lose in 75% of them. That 7 nil against Port Vale looks a bigger fluke by the week.

Thankfully, we’ve been winning away. And although no-one is saying it, it sounded like we were lucky at Northampton, played against 10 men at Wigan for 70 minutes, and beat a Cheltenham side that haven’t scored in their first 10 games this season (a record) and lost 9 of them. But it’s ok, cos one happy clapper optimist tells me Collins has a better PPG than Duff had at the same stage last season. I take that point, and we may well improve, but Duff took serial losers, having lost our 2 star players (sound familiar?) and within 2 months had gelled a side into something akin to half decent. Crucially, he dropped Connell and when he returned he was different class. What will save Collins? Rumour is (and this rumour comes from the highest) Connell won’t be seen till January. If we’re lucky.

In the meantime, what do we have? Well, we were so desperate Satdy, Collins had both Cosgrove AND Watters on the pitch. I thought he was taking my tea order when he asked ‘one lump or two’. (For the record, Neil, I don’t take any sugar in my tea; get the pair of them off.) I don’t know what was the bigger highlight from Satdy, watching a 6 foot 5 centre forward attempt a dribble on the right wing (spoiler: it didn’t end well) or seeing Watters scuff a close range shot wide late on from...oooohhhh...8 yards? We must be the only team in history who takes a player on loan, sees how terrible he is, then signs him permanently. Still, it passes the time, watching Watters struggle.

By now (the second half) I was sat downstairs with Slacki. I was thinking that with the football this bad, I might as well watch it from the appalling view of 4 rows back. Plus some little irritant had bought the seat next to me in the upper tier and was intermittently banging his seat. When I’m Prime Minister, I’m making it law that anyone under 10 sits in the family section. (Also, no man is allowed to wear perfume, sorry, ‘after shave’ if they’re to sit next to me at a game, my pet hate as I was forced to sit lower tier in my dad’s late years. Note: it wasn’t my dad wearing the perfume.)

Oh, yes, the manager. What team selection, what formation, was THAT? We appeared to alternate between a back 4 and 5. So a clueless back four and a half. There were 3 changes from the side that beat Northampton, one enforced (Lopata injured), the Frenchman returning after his disaster of a debut. McAtee was in for Cosgrove, and for 20 minutes he looked like the forward I’ve been craving, clever movement, deft touches and awareness of the players around him. Then he disappeared, save for the miss of the match (Watters aside, for at least McAtee made decent contact with the ball). He cut inside, 10 yards out…and skied the ball with only the keeper to beat. However, in that opening period he did lay the ball on for Cole to miss the first half’s big (only) chance…his effort hitting a defender.

Phillips was out too, not even on the bench. I’ve never missed him so much. In came Theo Chapman from the juniors. 1st league start? Last, if that’s owt to go by. Had a couple of early touches before becoming increasingly baffled as to what he was doing on a football pitch with actual men. Hauled off at half-time (though you’d have been hard pushed to notice, given his anonymity). On came the towering Cosgrove, and something for our exciting wingbacks to hit. Exciting wingbacks...who’s this Dodgson bloke? Where’s Cadden? God, I’m out of touch. Dodgson was never tested defensively, but never got up the park to put a cross in. O’Keefe on the other flank...well, ditto with regards the crosses, but couldn’t defend for toffee. Skinned more than once, it was his careless tackle which brought the penalty. I wouldn’t mind, but the ball was 10 yards in front of him and safely in our possession when O’Keefe’s leg made contact. Jordan Rhodes (is he still alive!!??) stroked it casually into the bottom corner.

Still, things did improve. Around the hour mark, Cotter and Cadden came on for O’Keefe and Dodgson. Within 10 minutes, both had whipped in deadly balls. (But are they deadly when you’re aiming at Cosgrove? Does a fallen tree make a sound...etc?) Or were Blackpool just retreating that bit further, having a lead to defend? With 15 left, the last throw of the dice, Watters for McAtee, about 10 seconds after the latter’s miss. I could leave now, but I’d miss all the fun. All the fun of watching a slowly leaking tap. Drip, drip, drip...the match drained to its inevitable conclusion.

Should we be worried? Well, next week I’m off to Exeter. So we can kiss goodbye to that excellent away record.

Onwards and upwards!

*** Cole. Good runs, good lay offs, set up a great chance with a direct run and pullback, put his only shot on target.
** Cadden. Great delivery. Should work for Deliveroo, where he’d be more appreciated.
* Cotter. Got up the pitch, and even had a shot blocked (matching the contribution of the front 4).

Official MOTM: McCart. One of 3 centre halves who had nought to do, save for kicking it square.

Londontykes’ POTY: 1. Cole 2. De Gevigny 3. Styles

Despatches:
Herbie Kane and the back 4 or 5. How many times can I watch a team play it backwards or square? (Actually, I saw Darlo do the same last week and it was bloody tedious then.) If I want to watch this kind of moroseness, I’d support whoever Russell Martin is managing this week. Or get my old videos of the Super Reds under Keith Hill. Mind, I guess we’ll have a bit more impetus now they’ve scored. Oh. (An early Kane crossfield ball which played a Red clean through was clearly not a harbinger of things to come.)

Yes, if 6 players (and the goalkeeper) aren’t doing anything creative, that leaves Theo Chapman, McAtee, Styles and Cole to produce something. Let me digest that a moment. Rumour has it Callum Styles thinks he’s a central midfielder. Well, so did I once upon a time. (I mean, I thought Styles would make a good central midfielder. I didn’t mean me. I personally didn’t quite have the athleticism to get up and down the pitch...but I could still play the Kane role, dawdling around the halfway line playing neat 6 yard passes). Styles though...the more I see him play there, the more he reminds me of JCR under Simon Davey, a square peg in a round hole.

I’ll leave the last word to the manager. Apparently ‘we never looked like losing’. Well, given we ‘never looked like scoring’ I’d say he mistakenly thinks a football match is 24 minutes long. By half-time, I’d take a draw. (Slacki held out till 3 mins off the end before agreeing same. I admire his optimism.) Their goalkeeper never made a save.

Drink du jour: Cloudwater Zitruskitzel and Jaipur in Spiral City. The former, I made that age old mistake...I love lemon, I love beer...oh dear, this is a bit sour and actually not very nice.

Away: 1438. Good turnout. Slacki thinks they like a trip here like we like a trip to Blackpool...cos they’re the only fans in living memory who haven’t complained ‘Barnsley’s a sh*thole...’ Fair point.

The Damage:
c.£30 petrol
£50 a star spangled banner (ie, a home shirt)
£2.50 fanzine
= c.£82.50

BFC 0-2 Blackpool, Tuesday 26th April 2022

‘Why are you watching Barnsley lose again when you could be on the sofa with me and Redders watching some great goals? An hour in and there have been 5.’

With relegation confirmed, I’m feeling very lonely at Oakwell tonite. Were there 4000 there, or 5? Probably the former, and that included around 800 from Blackpool. Nevermind protests against the owners, the empty seats speak volumes, as fans who’ve already paid to be here vote with their feet. And why not? It’s Man City-Real Madrid in a Champions League semi-final, it’s chilly, and we are RUBBISH. Yes, you’d be insane to turn out to watch this, especially as we’re down, but I’m determined to see every home league match for the first time since the season after the Prem. I think the crowd was officially given as 12,000 odd. Odd.

In a nothing of a game, Kitching gives the ball away in their half, one pass and they’re virtually clean through, cutting inside to rifle it into the top corner. Maybe some of the fans have been right all along…we should never have deviated from last year’s tactics of just booting it as far away down the pitch as we could, all the time, every time. At least we’d lasted 39 minutes.

Second half was a carbon copy, in that we never looked like creating a chance, nevermind scoring, in the first half….and we never looked like creating owt in the 2nd. But at least Adeboyejo plays a part in a goal, being outmuscled for the flick on. How can a bloke his size be muscled out of ANYTHING? He must be the weakest 16 stone player I’ve ever seen. 0-2 and a few more leave. The only Reds fans left must be members of some secret masochistic society.

Somehow, the Tangerines miss an easier chance than the ones they’ve scored, as they’re clean through and it’s bounced kindly…but he slices it. Still, another of theirs pops up to slam it off the far post with our defence all at sea. An even harder shot follows, as Wolfe wellies it off their bar from 25 yards. As close as we’ve got all night, as close as we’ve got all season. We are RUBBISH. Still, it was nice to see former Red Kenny Dougall running things in midfield.

Onwards and upwards!

*** No-one. In defence…..
** No-one. …..in midfield….
* No-one. …. up front….

Official MOTM: Wolfe. Yes, I was amazed they announced one too, considering we’d lost (again).

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. No-one 2. No-one 3. No-one

Despatches:
Today was the anniversary of our promotion to the Premiership. Just saying.

The (bizarre) highlight of the match was half-time. Quina, Bassi and Gomes, the loanees responsible for the 3 wins in February which offered us hope, were wheeled out in front of literally dozens of fans, to receive a bouquet of flowers and be frogmarched around the pitch. What’s the matter with a card and a simple ‘Thanks and f.off’…cos they might as well as. I can bet we’re paying these players’ wages right to the end of the season, so why not play ‘em, cos what we have left offer zero hope. And at least Quina gave us some entertainment, trying to guess at what point he’ll part with the ball.

I shouldn't criticise though. My own apathy shone through pre-match when I saw a couple of fans in orange and white scarves. I thought Stoke played in red. I presumed the colours had faded on them.

Drink du jour: A pint of Leffe with Nice Guy Chris in Wetherspoons. The original amber nectar and £3.79 to boot. Compared very nicely with the £3.65 flat white I’d had earlier.

Away: 800? Decent turnout from Blackie, midweek, nought to play for.

Points per game under Devaney: 0

The Damage:
£30 travel
£3 prog
= £33

The Tunes:
Antidawn EP (Burial)
Wet Leg (Wet Leg)
Greatest Hits (Tupac Shakur) (£1 in a charity shop; I’ll never get that money back.)