BFC 2-2 Reading, Saturday 13th April 2024

‘She’s fitter than him.’

Another game closer in our inexorable crawl to the play-offs. Good job games are fast running out. Today we scrape a draw at home to a side who’ve been fighting relegation all season, though of late, have found some form. So it’s no real surprise to see them go ahead, a near post free header off a corner. Did I see a stat last week about how few corners we concede from despite (because of?) our inability to mark players? Yes, I believe I did. So blame the purveyors of that particular stat for that weak concession. That and the zonal marking, which means if the opposition put an overload on, and the ball is in the right place, there is little we can do.

Could it also have anything to do with Coach Collins’ latest rendition of the back 3? Jordan is back, with MDG and Earl. So it IS all McCart’s fault. Earl meantime, despite a promising start to his Reds career, appears to be getting worse by the week under our Esteemed Leader. He was poor today. Jordan, meantime...how does he ever get back his former RWB form if he’s chopped and changed every week. This week’s RWB of choice is O’Keefe. By the 73rd minute we have 3 (THREE) right wing backs on the pitch – not for the first time, granted – as Cotter joins them. By now we’ve taken off our one wing back who’s any good (Cadden) and made O’Keefe switch wings, Jordan to right back, and Cotter playing right wing.

Cotter. I love Cotter. ‘Mercurial’ doesn’t do him justice. He CAN beat a player, he CAN outpace most players. What he CANNOT do is consistently control a ball, or cross it into an area Cole can ignore. His 17 minutes (plus...6?...injury time) are among the worst of anybody this season, which is saying something as that’s another leaderboard where he’s prominently placed. Anyway, at least Coach Collins is TRYING, even if there appears no horizon to his tactical genius. Oh, and he can chuck a ball. One of his chucks results in Inch-High Jalo scoring a header for two-all, as all the defenders get sucked too close and get under the ball, the fools. Underestimate our Barry at your peril!

Two-all? It was nil-one a minute ago. Yes, we manage an equaliser, as our two best players today combined, McAtee (tee tee) beating his man down the left and lobbing it over for Phillips to arrive and head home. It’s worth a view on t’telly for Cole’s body language at someone else scoring. There’s barely half an hour gone, but Reading receive a blow as Russell gets himself injured and has to limp off. The lump limped off. Fastest he moved all day. Connell is also out, so we’d had Russell and Kane central midfield. I couldn’t see a problem there. On comes his natural replacement, Jalo. Talk about like for like. Obviously, Coach Collins is hampered by having only one substitute approaching being considered ‘midfield’ and I can only imagine what a quality player Grant must be if he can’t get picked ahead of Kane or Russell, or can’t be trusted to replace either. Still, we get to see Jalo, which is what the fans have been clamouring for. He gets to be ‘player who loses the ball most’ though I s’pose that’s more likely as he tries to take players on. At least we played the ball to him, rather than expecting him to win headers or chase a ball down against a faster defender.

The game has been open, but we took control, second half. Least, that’s my memory of it. Goal King Cole has a simple chance to put us ahead, but elects to backheel it to the keeper instead of sweeping it home like any normal centre forward. He is 6 yards out. Coach Collins rings the changes, Cotter on (73), McCart on (79) and, like the last home game (don’t ask me who it was against, there’s some advantages to a poor memory!) it brings instant reward – for the opposition. Reading counter and their bloke hits an absolute ROCKET which hits the net in the middle of the goal. Unfortunately, Roberts has gone early, the ball has swerved and he’s been utterly bamboozled. Is that 3 games in a row he’s conceded from distance with a swerving shot? (I have an acute memory for certain things!)

With defeat looking likely, and all our ideas well and truly spent, Barry Cotter steps up to the plate on special teams. (Is that what they say in Yank football?) So THAT’S why he’s in the team. He’s never a FOOTballer, but he can’t half hoick a ball. Go Bazzer! Go Jalo! Go scraping into the play-offs!

Onwards and upwards!

*** Phillips. Class on the ball and looked our most likely scorer before he was.
** McAtee. ‘And they call him McAtee.’ But of course they do, Ponty End. The clue is in his name.
* Jalo. Like Bazza, thrilling to watch.

Official MOTM: Jalo.

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. Phillips 2. McAtee 3. Jalo

Despatches:
My friend Diane was away this week, so I went and watched some footballers’ legs down the front with Slacki. It’s like watching telly 30cm from the screen. It’s all in front of you but you can’t see owt. It consumes your entire lense, yet you’ve no idea how far out that last shot was. So don’t ask me how certain players played. Or if they played.

And if the answer is ’14 games’…what is the question?

Oh, and one of those things I miss about travelling back with the Londontykes...asking Reading/QPR fans how QPR/Reading have gone on today. To see their faces light up at someone showing an interest in their ‘meh’ teams, only to let them down by asking how a completely different side got on... (Thanks to Reedy at HT for that one. I hope you managed it on your way back!)

Drink du jour: Beertown Inception in Spiral City, a delightful hazy pale ale. (The Northern Monk Faith obvs didn’t last long!)

Away: c.600. I don’t think they announced it, though they said the overall figure.

The Damage:
c.£8 petrol
£45 retro shirt
= c.£53

BFC 1-1 Reading, Saturday 2nd April 2020

‘When’s uz last game?’ ‘If we dunt win today, today.’

What can I say? In a match we HAD to win, did we score too early? Why could the midfield and forward line not hold on to a ball? Does our manager have a CLUE? I’ll start with the former. No, we didn’t score too early. For 20 minutes, we looked half decent. Morris, especially, was a handful for the opposition, which is why they targeted him. Around 20 minutes in, Morris lays the ball off. There isn’t a player within a metre of him. THAT’S how late the challenge was. I’m with the ref, I missed it too, following the ball. But the linesman had NO excuse, it was right in front of him. Reedy, who DID see the challenge, was convinced it shoulda been a red. Morris, laid out, was never the same again but such is the weakness of our bench, and his strength of character, he played till the end.

Earlier, Morris had opened the scoring with a cracking strike, low across the keeper, into the bottom corner after a smart move involving Bassi and Quina. We only had 85 minutes to hang on. And hang on we nearly did after Morris was crippled, as a heroic performance at the back from Mads nearly got us over the line. Sadly, managerial ineptitude cost us. For 60 minutes our tictacs were simply control it, pass it square, pass it square, get closed down, HOOF! Was that the ghost of Keith Hill I saw in the dugout? ‘If you shop at Lidl…’. Anyway, a hoof – to a midget’s head. Sorry, a mini-person. (I heard this week M&S or somesuch had renamed midget gems mini gems. My God.) Unfortunately, quality as Bassi is, he cannot control a ball with his forehead when a mountainous defender looms over him. This happened time and time and time again. What did Einstein say about repeating something expecting a different result? I realise the bench was weak, but at least Big Vic offers a bit of physical. (Indeed, he came on in the 90th minute and nearly scored, the keeper nicking it off his toe.)

I also understand no-one else held onto the ball. Quina tried (his natural instinct being not to part with it anyway) but Reading simply doubled, or trebled up on him. More good old days…this time remembrance of teams doing it to Adam Hammill and us having no answer. Fair play to Reading – they’d done their homework. (Didn’t I mention this last game, when I saw Hecky in the stands…all the opposition have to do is mark Quina!?) But Asbaghi needs to second guess this one too. Quina needs to be told to give and go sometimes, not stand on it till he’s surrounded and possession is inevitable ceded.

We scraped to half time, one nil up. ‘This’ll finish one-all’ said a wise old sage (Nozzer). Nobody disagreed. And if the writing was already on the wall after the first 45, it was painted in 10 foot letters in the second. We cleared it up pitch, they built from the back, got into our third, Mads would clear, they built from the back, got into our third, Mads (or maybe Kitching this time) would clear…honestly, round and round this scenario went, with Reading edging closer and closer each time, while Asbaghi does what he does best – prays a tiring team will hold on. (I suppose he tried the ‘bringing on Jasper Moon to hold on’ the other week, and that didn’t work; he’s tried the sticking on Benson and Palmer…and that didn’t work. But the point is, whether he does SOMETHING or NOTHING, it’s all in the name of ‘hanging on’. PLEASE put Bassi out of his misery and stick Big Vic on. ANYTHING to try and put some physical pressure on their defence. He didn’t, they scored.

A ball is played forward and after a deflection it drops nice for their player to play it back for a tap-in. They had 4 players in and around our 6 yard box to our 3, so someone wasn’t doing their job. Of course it dropped to them. Asbaghi’s excuse? Teams who are losing ‘take risks’. Yes, yes they do. But from where I was sitting, doing NOTHING was taking a risk, and we paid for it. Into injury time and he sticks Big Vic on. We proceed to nearly score TWICE, as Brittain sidefoots one at the keeper on the back post (superb 40 yard crossfield ball, whoever that was) before Vic nearly toepokes in a rebound. We did more in the first and last 5 minutes than we did in the 80 inbetween, and for that, Poya, I blame YOU.

Onwards and upwards!

*** Mads. Towering performance at the back.
** Morris. Won headers, held defenders off, cracking strike….Reading knew what they were doing with the hatchet job.
* Kitching. An able partner for Mads, ensuring Helik wasn’t (too) missed.

Official MOTM: Mads

Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. (Mads) Andersen 2. Morris 3. Kitching

Despatches: Almost tasty pre-match, as a group of Reading yoof made the mistake of making their mouths go outside the Courthouse. Luckily, Old Bill were there to escort them to the ground. ‘You’re going down with the Barnsley’ came the response. Ha haaa, that’s told ‘em. They were so happy with themselves too, it was same again afterwards, as another small group of Royals baited Reds fans up Regent Street, knowing the police were there to protect them. Who knew Reading had a ‘crew’? A hundred strong yoof of our own stood ready, Stone Island at attention, scarves hiding their faces. (I guess it’s difficult to ‘look hard’ wearing one of those NHS facemasks.)

Indeed, one forgets Reading actually have a football team, and fair play to them for bringing 1500, or three times their normal number. I’d forgotten the game actually meant something to them, as the draw protected their 5 point lead over us. It’s not quite the end, but the end is very near. Even presuming we win our 2 home games, we’ll have to get some points away from Oakwell. Relegated, then.

The players? As I said, Quina lost the ball time and time again, but his work rate out of possession was first rate, always tracking back. Wolfe and Gomes looked steady but were eventually overrun. Vita wasn’t great, but made a tremendous goal saving block first half – but should he have been marking that player to begin with? I thought Collins didn’t have much to do, but the highlights suggest he made 3 or 4 decent saves – and there was nothing he could do with the goal. Flapped a couple of time though. Styles was taken off for Oduor. Bizarre on the face of it (Hi Poya!) but I think Styles played internationally midweek (for Hungary, of course). Brittain had a mixed game, summed up by 2 passages of play; one, he makes a crucial block, throwing himself, to prevent a goal, while the other side of his game saw him bring the ball out of defence, stroll along (probably whistling to himself) until he was tackled and they had 3 on 3. More ghosts…(Dangerous) Brian O’Callaghan anyone?

And finally (cos you leave the humorous stories to last, don’t you?)…the referee. Without Jonesy to go apoplectic, it was left to A. Reed, who could barely eat his sandwich at half-time for ranting. I have to say, I couldn’t defend this comedian (the ref, not Reedy, although…). He pulled up Brittain for stealing 5 yards on a throw-in. The VERY next Reading throw, they steal 10 yards. That’s allowed. (He’s obviously deaf as well, cos enough people were shouting at him.) Then there’s the ‘attention’ Morris was given throughout. Yes, I know he’s a big, tough, strong lad, but it’s STILL A FOUL. Mind, 42 minutes in and Collins held the ball 19 (NINETEEN) seconds. Not even 9. The rule is 6. What is the point of this rule anymore? (The bloke behind me complimented Collins’ ‘sh*thousery’, but I don’t go to matches to see goalkeepers waste time. Not even ours. And there were still 48 minutes to go.)

But let’s give the ref his dues, he didn’t fall for Ince’s playacting for a penalty. And with daddy Paul being the manager, the ghost of London Road (Peterborough) reared its head as ‘Your dad’s a cnut, and so are you’ rung round the Ponty. I always thought I didn’t believe in ghosts but today was full of ‘em. Asbaghi continues to haunt me.

Drink du jour: House Party IPA.

Away: 1,574. I’ve never seen so many. Obviously the away numbers were a surprise to BFC too, programmes selling out well before kick-off

League games since we won having conceded an equaliser: 50. The half century is up. Hurrah.

The Damage:
c. £35 petrol
= c. £35

The Tunes:
BBC5Live
Show (The Cure)

Reading 2-0 BFC, Saturday 29th February 2020

‘If Schmidt and Bahre are the answer, I don’t even know the question.’

Welcome to ...

After 3 clean sheets and 3 victories, normal service has resumed after a meek loss at Reading.  One should never get one’s hopes up, but this was definitely one we could file under ‘winnable’.  Indeed, even when one down at half time I was optimistic – we’d played poorly and still created 3 blinding opportunities.  Imagine what will happen when we ‘click’.  Little did I know, this was our good half.

The Colosseum awaits its gladiators.

The first half was a strange affair from our perspective.  Like any Sunday morning game, we looked at our most dangerous when Reading had the ball.  Their defence took risks and lacked the capability to see them through.  Cauley robbed one of them on the halfway line, strode forward and drilled it wide.   Critics pointed out the 3 Reds players in support (versus one defender) while I’d highlight how he scored from the same position at Plymouth last season.  And if I was Cauley, would I pass the ball to someone less capable? 

Not the Main Stand side.

Brown had earlier missed a similar chance, a free shot from the edge of the area.  The kind Andy Liddell used to bury.  Then, in the last minute of the half, a Reading player was again caught dawdling in possession, Thomas robbed him, made a beeline for the penalty area and passed it to Cauley.  The shot, from the edge of the box, was easily saved but somehow the rebound fell to him again and he crashed an almighty shot towards the roof of the net, only for the keeper to come good again.  That was the last time we threatened.

The managers prowl their technical areas.

Did I mention we were one down?  After 17 minutes, Reading curled a beautiful free kick into the danger zone.  It looked initially like we’d dealt with it…but oh no, the ball bobbled around and somehow squirmed into our net.  From the far end it was difficult to understand what happened, but it looked like the ball got caught up in Jacob Brown’s feet.  An OG?

A genuine Reading v Barnsley match ticket.  How much am I bid?

The second half was a masterclass in holding onto a one-nil.  Reading spent the entire half getting men behind the ball, while we went sideways-sideways-backwards-sideways.  It was pure Keith Hill from us, as, even when we won the ball, we were so pedestrian they simply trotted back into position.  Mind, it also helped they had the best player on the pitch, a massive central midfielder, Ejaria (who, it turns out, is actually a Liverpool player).  Time and again he bullied our midgety midfield, time and again he’d track back, overtake them, and snuff out the danger.

Action in front of a sparse Main Stand.

We ‘enjoyed’ 62% possession, but, as someone said, Mowatt must have had the ball for 20 minutes.  At one point, determined to keep possession against absolutely no-one, he turned back towards his own goal.  Hadn’t he noticed Reading running back into their own half every time they lost it?  Cos we had.  Needless to say they then scored with possibly their first foray into our half.  Poor defending too, as Halme (I think) was turned on the halfway line and never looked like getting back.  Collins, off his line, less ‘narrowed the angle’ than ‘gave the bloke an open goal’.  2-0, game over.

A bad day at the office, but the rotund woman hasn’t started warbling yet.  We live to fight another day.

Onwards and upwards!

*** Woodrow.  Only one who looked capable.    

** No-one.

* Him again. No-one.

Londontykes' MOTM: 1, Woodrow  2. Jordan Williams  3. No-one

Players give thanks.  Officials skulk off.

Despatches:The shot count was 21-7 in our favour.  Another misnomer, as 15 of them must have been dinked or hoofed into the stand.  We problies lost 5 minutes there, as there weren’t many ballboys/fans behind that far goal.

In positive news, the lesser sighted Captain (Phil) rocked up to the pub, as well as Big Jim.  I also bumped into Tim at the game (welcome back!) as well as a few of the regulars.  And I don’t know who to feel sorry for out of Loko and his San Franciscan girlfriend: her, for enduring the cold of Reading, or him, for being forced to tour the galleries of London on Sunday in return.  Poor Ben…

Drink du jour: IPA in Greyfriars.  Champion.

Away: 735

The Damage:

£20 ent

£14 train

£2 bus to stadium (I'm sure it used to be 3!)

£3 programme

= £39

Madjeski panorama

1st view of the stadium

The teams meet 'n' greet

Courthouse Reds' salubrious coach.

BFC 1-1 Reading, Saturday 30th December 2017

‘They crucified Jesus.  And that turned out alright.’

Be Proud!

Voice of doom here.  I don’t know what everyone’s on about, all this ‘played well, shoulda won’ nonsense.  It was yet another game where we never looked like scoring – and didn’t, till the ball fell to a defender who headed home in injury time.  Yes, Thiam ran about a bit and looked lively.  Like one of his subs performances, but this time for 70 minutes.  But did he ever look like he would bag?  No.  So Hecky took him off in a three-pronged substitution and received boos for his decision-making. The same decision-making which took us from losing to drawing.  Proof indeed that some of the crowd are turning against Hecky?  I mean, I’ve not heard it from any of the LONDON Londontykes, but Wadd, Molly, and, to a lesser extent, Nozzer, have all been uttering anti-Hecky jibes while turning Little Lee into a managerial god.  Talk about a Stalinist re-writing of history.

424 away fans.  Did I hear right?

One thing we can all agree is that Ugbo isn’t the answer.  Though as has been pointed out, one of the three (I thought it was two!) touches he had in his 25 minutes involved nipping in front of Mannone and clipping a goalbound header over him which a defender cleared.  This was as close as ANY of our attacking players came to scoring and for that, I salute him.  He made the right run and got his head to the ball.  As for our other 6 shots on target (the stats tell me) I have no idea where they came from. If you’d said 3, I’d have said that was more like.  But when one of them surely includes Mannone tipping over a shot which was going over anyway…

The view from the Ponty...for a change.

Actually, I do remember one decent bit of link up play between Thiam and Bradshaw which ended up with a good shooting opportunity, Bradshaw testing the keeper.  But you know when the crowd have lost hope: even when we had 2 corners at 0-1, there was no chant from the Ponty of ‘Come on you Reds’. They were met with shrugs.  The team deserve better.  (Support did come, as we threw men forward late on.)

The old Main Stand at half time.

The problem was, we’d seen it all before. A side had come to Oakwell looking to secure a goalless draw and had somehow found themselves winning.  Howthehell does this happen? Well, today Matthew, a 40 yard cross from their left was headed in from 4 yards out by a disbelieving centre forward.  Where was Davies?  Still stood on his line, watching it.  Now, I like Davies, but his shot stopping hasn’t been great this season and his ability on crosses has never been there.  Surely time to bring in someone who will challenge him for his position, rather than a bloke who couldn’t get a game in the Conference.

The Ponty v Reading.

At least the crowd didn’t leave this time, or at least very few did.  But that was probably due to the new game show in town: see how long it takes before Ugbo touches the ball.  I know they were playing it around me in the Ponty, and it was the talk of the pub later. 25 minutes for maybe 3 touches.  No wonder everyone thought Thiam was amazing.  At least he could occasionally hold onto the ball.  Can Ugbo REALLY be the finest 18 year old centre forward in the land?  I’d weep for England’s chances, if only I could give a s***.  It’s like that Arsenal loanee we had in division 3, ‘the best 17 year old in the land’.  Last seen being sent packing from another loan spell with Oxford.  I forget his name, such was his amazingness.  Well, yeah, Uggboot’s like him.  Though Uggy did play well at Spurs, so perhaps, a la Odejayi, his real level is the Premiership!

The East Stand.

Fortunately, with time running out, Pinnock (and half the team) were pushed forward…and we scored.  Do you think there’s a correlation there somewhere?  Isgrove (on as sub; thank you Lord Hecky) whipped in a super ball and Pinnock crashed home a great header into the opposite corner.  Unstoppable.  Cue big hugs from Jonesy and jumping around like loons.  Well, you have to make the most of these things, 1^st home goal in 5 matches.

So, yeah, the game was slightly less s*** than usual…cos we scored…but it was still s***.  The pronounced opinion was that Reading are a poor team – a poor team we failed to beat (and wiped the floor with us at their place, where I can confirm they looked a poor team there as well).  We are in big BIG trouble and as things stand, I think we’re going down.  It was good to hear pre-match that no-one shares my opinion (do they ever?) but given the disconnect between our view of Hecky, I can only think that some people imagine the only way out of this is to find a new manager.  As Wadd told me in the pub ‘our new owners won’t let us go down’.  I’m not sure this is how promotion/relegation works, but I live in hope.  We are now one point above relegation and a mere 3 above bottom.  Permission to panic, Captain Mainwaring?

Onwards and upwards!

The away end.  Does it look any closer to 424?

*** Pinnock.  Twitter MOTM. I thought he had an excellent game at centre half and the goal was the cherry on the icing.
** Thiam.  Ran around for longer than usual looking keen.
* Hammill.  Some fabulous delivery, particular in the 1^st half – met by nobody.  (File under: why Thiam isn’t good enough.)

Londontykes' MOTM: 1. Pinnock  2. Thiam  3. Hammill

Despatches:
In a change to the programme, my plans were completely thrown pre-match.. Slacki’s sister had tickets to the darts final on New Years Day and couldn’t make it, so, having banged on about the darts on the train up, here was my chance.  Cue tickets bought, one very happy partner, Sunderland away cancelled, no visit back home and quick deliberations on whether to get smashed with the Londontykes on the train back after the game….or get smashed ‘in tarn’ with the Slackmeister.  The latter it was.  I still can’t decide if I regret it (see later).  I know I gave away my ear muffs to the cute girl behind the counter in Greggs in the early hours…
Then it was back to the pub for too many pints before I was taken to top Barnsley gentleman’s emporium ‘Wildcats’ where entrance was free (cos no-one had any money to be out between Xmas and New Year?) and Carling was £3.50.  Slacki and I have decided this is our new drinking hole of choice.

Our players?  Barnes showed flashes of his earlier brilliance for us.  Fryers had a dodgy start, letting a player run past him for a cheap shot.  Yiadomlooked good, but was injured as Reading crossed from his side for their goal.  (I later learnt this was Hecky’s fault too, for not subbing him before the goal.  Then it turned into the physio’s fault for not getting him off sooner.  I’m exasperated.)  Williams had his usual game (and Jonesy can now concur he does lose the ball cheaply at times, cos there was more than one occasion where I said ‘who gave that away?’ before following the man to find out it was Williams.)  I have to say though, he did put some decent balls out wide.  Bradshaw was half decent, and linked up better with Thiam today.  Gardnerwas…I dunno.  Didn’t do much wrong, didn’t do much full stop.  Kept possession?  Lindsay kept it tight, while Davies didn’t.  And when Davies loses his confidence, the first thing that goes is his kicking.  So after conceding, one of his hoofs went straight out for a throw…which gets fans on his back, which makes him lose more confidence…etc

Where it all began...steps into the Ponty end.

Drink du jour: 
Arcade Ale House: Sierra Nevada 7.2%, Rhubarb cider, some bottled IPA or other
Old #7: Erdinger
Wildcats: Carling

Me and and my erstwhile buddy got in a terrible, terrible drink-induced mess.  We blame our Barnsley-based acquaintances for leaving us by 8pm.  At least Hicksy and his Mrs stayed out – and they don’t even live in Barnsley.

Away: 424.  Allegedly.  (There must have been a helluva lot under the stand, cos there were never 424 in it.)

The Damage:
£12 train from London
£12 train to Durham (which I obviously didn’t get)
£36 train from Durham to London (ditto)
= £60

The Tunes:
Days Are Gone (Haim)

Did I say I’m off to the darts final??? WOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1st half panorama v Reading.

Half time panorama from the back of the Ponty.