Boro 3-1 Barnsley, Saturday 26th April 2014 (relegation special)

‘Barnsley didn’t look like they wanted to stay up.’

Plenty of flags and seats.  Especially seats.

If ever there was a damning indictment of this game and our entire season, this was it – delivered by a Boro fan on local radio after the match.  We were awful, with intermittent average bits in the second half.  Who’d have thought we were in last chance saloon, needing to win, or die trying?  It was desperately poor – as it has been all season.  (When was the last time any of us could name every SINGLE victory of a season?  Cos I can with this one.)

1^st half, when we had the ball (possession-wise it wasn’t far off even), we ambled forward, knocked it sideways sideways backwards while nobody got up the park to support the forward line.  Of course, we were REALLY going for it, cos Wilson actually put 2 ‘forwards’ on the pitch if you include Pedersen. (And if you’ve been wondering what the Norweigan Pest has been doing these last few months, it appears to be…eating pies.  Vitesse Arnhem will be chuffed to bits when they see him next.)  We were getting nowhere, nowhere fast.

When they had the ball, they sliced through us time and again.  Some bloke called Butterfield appeared to be calling the shots.  It was bizarre watching an ex-player, someone who you know can shoot, be given the freedom of the park to trot forward and have a go.  A bit like teams used to let Redfearn do, to my amazement.  Thankfully, Steele was there to save the day.  And then there were the throughballs.  Boro obviously have something we DON’T have – scouts.  Cos they seemed to know that if you drop a ball BEHIND M’Voto, he’ll never be able to turn around and run after it.  Cue a series of one-on-ones Steele saved.  It coulda..shoulda…been 5 or 6 at the break.  We crawled in goalless.  Maybe it was gonna be our day!!??  (Don’t worry folks, I never for once thought we were going to win this game.  Avoiding embarrassment appeared as good as we could hope.)

The sides are introduced...

2^nd half, more of the same, till we got a corner.  Would ‘TK’ dink another pointless ball into the keeper’s arms, like the 2 in the first half?  (The lady who I sat next to thought I was a clairvoyant when I correctly predicted TK would do this with his first one.)  Well…TK did indeed dink a gentle outswinging corner in and while Boro ran around like chickens in the 6 yard box, M’Voto was allowed to gently sidefoot a bobbler into the far corner.  (Wadd: pls note, ANOTHER goal wot would have been avoided had they a man on the line).  The worst defended corner in history.  Anyway, who cares…’HE’S MAGIC YOU KNOW, YOU’LL NEVER GET PAST M’VOTO’.  (Strangely, no ‘he scores when he wants’ this week).

But damn right – you’ll never get past M’Voto.  You don’t have to.  Within a minute he’s handed Tomlin the ball on a plate for the latter to rifle home off the far post.  Oh the irony - the ex-Posh striker must have been p***ing himself after that goal.

Then Boro take pity on us.  They take off Butterfield, the best outfield player on the park.  From the away end, there’s a smattering of boos and applause. For what it’s worth, I applauded him off, and he turned round and applauded me for applauding him.  Class act.  Compare to Perkins, Dawson, O’Brien, Mellis, Cywka…anyone in our midfield, really.  ‘One greedy ba5tard’?  Yeah, he coulda signed a new contract with us, but we can blame Hill for that one…he shoulda tied him down long before THAT injury.  A caller to Radio Tees described the substitution thus: ‘We took Butterfield off and we went to pot.’

I know, it’s hard to believe, given the final score, but it gave us an ‘in’.  Boro lost their fluency and we started creating some half chances.  Lardar5e was taken off and German Nick came on, and JoB returned for Lawrence.  Soon after, Herman prodded a volley just wide (unlucky: it was a snapshot) while O’G shot over.  Mind, Nick ruined another attack by going one way, then the other then back again before running the ball out of play.  With at least two chances to cross the ball, or cut it back to Dawson, this was the finest impression of Paddy McCourt since…Paddy McCourt.  Then, a defender slipped and we were 2 on one….but the defender took one for the team, diving on the ball, handling it and getting a booking.  We never came close again, though Danny Rose came on and did at least actually run 10 yards and fling himself at a cross (too high) while everyone else stood and watched.

With injury time looming and us camped on the edge of their box, O’Brien lost it cheaply and they ran to the other end to score, albeit from the rebound after Steele saved ANOTHER one-on-one.  Still, we had 5 mins to bag two, but while the foul on Jennings on the edge of their box was ignored, they ran up the field again to notch, Steele outnumbered.

So there it is, goodbye Championship, hello Ale House League.  Down with a whimper.  (What a great chant!  ‘Down with a whimper, we’re going down with a whimper..’)  A fair few Reds left at 2-1 while the rest stayed to applaud the team off and give it ‘Barnsley till I die’.  If only the players would give it some – we have been down since the opening day (0-4 at home!?)  The recent away wins have only delayed the inevitable.  Unbelievably, we’d problies have stayed up this year on 46 pts – 10 less than last year when we scraped up.  And we couldn’t even get that.

ONE of their home ends...

*** Ste-ele (Ste-ele).  So far the MOTM it’s untrue.  After the other players were trooping off, he came over to applaud us.  This finally looks like the end for us and Steele – far and away the best player we have.  I’ll be sorry to see him go.

** No-one.  We have a match to win and nobody else turned up.  F***ing appalling.

* Dawson.  Prompted and drove from midfield and looked alright, actually (once Butterfield had gone off).

Despatches:
M’Voto is lost when teams don’t punt balls to his head.  Anything behind him and we are in serious, serious trouble.  (See also, the goals 3^rd division Cov scored to beat us in the FA Cup).  Why Crainie wasn’t the last man, I’m not sure.  I think he was marking Graham, which allowed Tomlin et al to run in behind.  Jennings was garbage.  Never had a kick till late on, when he kept trying to cut inside for a shot despite having better placed players to kick it to. O’Brien came on and confused our entire forward line with a gorgeous reverse pass.  It was like Sheron in his pomp – different wavelength to the rest of the team!  But our forwards could make Zico look like a numpty, having NO IDEA where to run to for a goalscoring opportunity.

Oh, and after the match I met a disconsolate Sir Bobby of Hassell in the car park (with his mate Lawrence – they must have got out quick!)  I wished him the best for his testimonial, but he really did look like he was fuming.  A sorry end to the Great Man’s BFC career.  I thanked him and wished him luck, presuming he wasn’t going to be with us next year.

Away: c 1000.  Not the 1700 who went all the way to Plymouth t’other year with BELIEF.  And not the 3000 (free tickets) Blackpool took to Wigan to cheer their team to victory and give them a chance of staying up.  Still, plenty of ironic chants of ‘Your ground’s too big for you’ and ‘We’ve got more fans than you’.  The rest of the ground really did look empty.

Over and out.
A

The road to division 3.

Barnsley 0-1 Dirty L**ds, Saturday 19th April 2014

‘We’re s*** and we’re staying up’

No, not us.  Them.  The evil enemy.  I am about as depressed as I have been all season after watching THE worst game all year and having it all compounded by 4000 odd DL fans rubbing our noses in it.  ‘How s*** must you be, we’re winning away.’  ‘That’s why you’re going down, that’s why you’re going down’.  ‘You’re going down, you’re going down, Barnsley’s going down.’  Too bloody right.  As some bloke said on leaving the ground, ‘We deserve to go down just for that performance alone.’

It was going to be all so different.  Results had gone right for us on Easter Friday…Charlton, Yeovil, Donny and Blackpool failing to even register a goal.  We’d beaten DL in our last 4 home games…only beaten once in 9 off those ****s (and that a penalty given for a foul outside the box).  DL on an appalling run of form themselves.  3 points and we’re above Blackpool and possibly out of the bottom 3 for the 1^st time since…???  How it all fell apart.

It's busy downstairs!

What is there to say about this game?  If you can imagine 2 teams unable to keep the ball longer than 2 passes, then banging it down the pitch to no-one in particular…for 90 minutes…you’d get a fair idea of just how appalling this match was.  In a way, we should be grateful for Ross McCormack, DL’s star striker, for providing the ONLY piece of class in the game.  15 mins in DL banged another long ball down the pitch, their massive striker (Matt Smith?) flicked it on and McCormack flicked it past Crainie with one touch, ran on to it and crashed the ball home in the far corner. 

So, we now HAVE to score, just to eke out a draw.  We’ll REALLY have a go now.  Errr…no we won’t.  We’ll bang long balls to O’Grady, who is outjumped every time by their giant centre half.  But even if he wasn’t, what’s he gonna do against 4 (count ‘em!) defenders?  By my reckoning, that should mean that SOMEWHERE on that pitch, we’re outnumbering them, but I couldn’t see where.  We’d get the ball, maybe knock it square or backwards a couple of times, while DL got men behind the ball and we’d be left with a long punt up field.  Repeat to fade.  God it was awful.  Then once DL had the ball, they’d do the same.  God it was awful.  Awful.

At least it was sunny!

 *** No-one.  Sponsors MOTM was M’Voto.  Well, if the opposition insist on banging ball to M’Voto’s head, of course he’ll head a few back.  But in terms of distribution, Jean-Yves was part of the problem.  King of hoofers.

** No-one.

* No-one.  Anyone voting for M’Voto presumably must put in a vote for Steele too, cos he never put a foot wrong.  No chance with the goal and had FA else to do.

Despatches:
Don’t play McCourt, Paddy McCourt, I just don’t think he understands.  It seems harsh to call your worst players the subs, but have I ever seen as hapless a cameo as this?  Couldn’t dribble, couldn’t pass.  Could barely run.  The man’s an embarrassment.  Then Wilson puts Proschwitz on and not only has he no pace, but since he seems unable to jump, couldn’t win a header either.  A chocolate fireguard of a player.

Cywka appeared to be trying to get up in support of O’Grady…but was either too far back to start with or too inept to make a difference.  But at least he had a shot.  Jennings had a couple too, the closest we got to scoring.  He got a header in on target, which gently plonked into the keeper’s hands (it was Butland, by the way, a fact I was completely unaware of till Jonesy told me on the way home) while the other was a clever flick with the outside of his right boot.  Had Butland anticipated a cross, it might have crept in.  Instead, it trickled into the alert keeper’s arms.  Dawson huffed and puffed, but could never get the ball under control whilst pressured.  I thought our best stuff came down our right, from McLaughlin and Etuhu, until McLaughlin went completely off the boil 2^nd half and Etuhu was taken off, presumably a ‘tactical change’ (which didn’t work).

So there we have it.  5 home games without a goal (one chance missed:  M’Voto’s header) and never at any point during those games have we looked like getting a goal.  Concede and we might as well go home.  Don’t concede and we might as well go home.  How have we scored so many away lately?  Well, maybe it’s that the opposition have to come and attack us (being that they’re at home), leaving a bit of space.  But certainly our shooting has been better away, as we’ve seen 5 or 6 20 yarders…while at home shots are going 10 yards high or wide.  We absolutely deserve to be going down, no doubt about it.  Those away games have camouflaged what has been a woeful season and the cows are now coming home to roost.  We’ll only go down by a few points and we’ll feel sorry for ourselves that we didn’t do this, didn’t do that.  In particular, O’G has had NO support up front and I don’t understand why he hasn’t been given a smaller, nippier player to play with.  Dagnall?  Danny Rose?  ABU (Anyone But UselessProschwitz).  Or maybe I CAN understand:  the midfield is so s*** we have to play 5 there to fail to do the job 4 of them couldn’t do.  At the same time, the defence has never looked better (despite Kennedy), the renaissance of M’Voto being of particular significance.  He’ll do well in division 3.  Grrrrrrrrrrr.

Those Dirty L**ds hordes...nearly as many as Derby!

Drink du jour: one bottle of your finest Absolut, complemented with Tropicana, between the 2 of us. What with beers in the pub beforehand and afterhand, I guess you could say we probably WERE a little 'tired and weary'.

See youse at Crawley.

A

                                                                                                                              

Sampdoria 0-4 Inter, Sunday 13th April 2014

'Forza Italia!'

First off, well done to my travel co-ordinator (and official photographer – I hope you can see the difference!) for booking us into a hotel by Brignole station.  Handy on all 3 necessary counts: close to the Samp club shop (for match tickets) and inbetween both the stadium and city centre. Perfick!

From Brignole, an easy walk to the Stadio Luigi Ferraris.  Just head through the tunnel to the left of the station (as you look at it) and just keep walking.  About 15-20 mins, though you’ll be with plenty of others in their Samp shirts, and there’s plenty of bars you can stop off for a snifter.

Ever since Italia 90 I’ve wanted to visit here.  

Stadio Luigi Ferraris

It looked fabulous on telly, a welcome antidote to all those other Italian stadia with a running track around and huge pointless stands miles away from the pitch.  (Whatever happened to the Stadia delle Alpi?  And what crowds at Bari these days?) The Luigi Ferraris on the other hand, 4 imposing stands right on top of the pitch and those corners filled in with terracotta-coloured structures, topped with towers, inbuilt floodlights and white steel stanchions holding up the roof.  Grand.  So I was a bit surprised to read the stadium is now a bit tired looking and there’s talk of building a new ground.  DON’T!!!  Fair play, the paint IS peeling, the upstairs concourses are cramped and there’s nothing to savour inside beyond its size and style, but there’s just something about it.  Nothing a lick of paint and some refreshment kiosks/club shops wouldn’t brighten up.  (Mind, I was in the opposite end to the ultras – maybe there IS more under the stands on the other sides?)

As I said, nice walk up to the ground.  You could just follow the path of the river too, but beware the lack of path adjacent.  And make sure you get your ticket in advance, cos I saw nowhere around the ground you could get one.  I bought mine at the Sampdoria Point (club shop) at the Via Cesarea 107-109, off September 20th street.  (I’m translating.  I think it’s summat like Via Septembre XX).  Very easy.  Mind, take your passport.  But again, I never had mine and, perhaps worried they weren’t gonna make a sale, my credit card and date of birth were enough.  Would I like behind the goal (€21), on the wing (€31) or the posh seats (centre of the side stand, €51). Needless to say, I wasn’t electing to pay €51 to see a game.  €21 it was…

I always like a walk around the ground, but when your tickets are in the other end, you’ve no choice, especially when, as here, they put huge gates across the street to stop you actually getting to within a block of the ground without a ticket for the appropriate area.  So I got a champion tour of the streets one block away, until we found our gates.  (Even then, they weren’t technically our gates, according to our match tickets, but they were gates for that end, so they let us in).  Once inside, it’s all a bit underwhelming, all concrete and no colour, no shops, no stalls, no nuffing.  Good job it’s only a few minutes to kick off then!

We did our best.  Honest we did.  But we had no idea where our tickets were meant to be, other than the top tier.  As far as I could tell, our row didn’t exist, our seat number didn’t exist…and if it did, it was in an area which already looked full.  So, spotting a few spare seats, we headed there and dusted down our filthy seats.  (They’re bucket seats, seemingly used mainly as steps for other fans to walk all over.)  One oddity: there were absolutely no stewards in sight.  It seems that once they’ve checked your passport to get in (!), you can please yourself.

Sampdoria ultras and their flags

It was a decent crowd too.  Cracking flag display from the ultras (some, in the upper tier behind the goal, can’t have seen ANY of the match) and most excellent comedy booing of ex-striker Icardi, now in Inter colours.

Inter fans meantime filled their upper tier and had no-one downstairs.  Maybe they were only given a tiny allocation?  Either way, a family of Inter fans sat nearby us, a fact ascertained when Icardi (who else?) scored after 13 minutes.

Inter away fans and their banners

A very cool first time hit from a right wing cross. Cue predictable booking for cupping his ear to the ultras in celebration.  (Why do players, after they’ve been baited the whole time, get a booking for this? You can hardly say he’s winding up their fans; they wound themselves up).  Then it all went mad.

Inter's first goal

First up, Samp missed a pen.  Blondie (Maxi Lopez) was running away from goal to nowhere in particular when he got tripped just before he got outside the box.  What stupidity.  Blondie stepped up and the keeper palmed it away, low to his right. 

Sampdoria's missed penalty

A couple of minutes later and Eder is storming towards goal for Samp.  He jumps out of the way of the tackle, rolls on the floor but instantly jumps up without an appeal.  The ref blows and books him for diving.  A tad harsh, me thinks, but it’s enough for all these Italians (err…mainly Argentinians, looking at the teamsheet) to dive in and have a row.  In the midst, Eder puts his hand against someone’s cheek and it’s enough to get him sent off.  20 mins in and the ref has essentially put an end to this game.

Samp sending off

However, Samp come out fighting.  Not literally.  Despite Inter running the game, Samp manage to bring off another 3 world class saves from keeper Handanovic (who La Gazzetta dello Sport give a MOTM 9/10 to the following day).  Blondie in particular is leading the line superbly in the absence of his mate up front.  The teams go in at half time, 0-1.

Second half, after an initial promising start, Inter simply picked them off, as you’d expect.  Samp tired, Inter knocked the ball around like they weren’t interested…then they’d hit them on the break.  

Samuel banged in a header off a corner, while Icardi scuffed one in and Palacio calmly finished for four. I got the impression Inter coulda got 6 or 7 had they wanted, but were too polite to rub Samp’s noses in it.  Just time then for a young Lombardo to come off the bench for a great reception.  Any relation to Atilio?  Must be.

Samuel's goal for Inter

Fair dues to the Samp ultras.  They stayed till the end, got their flags out intermittently and there was a hint of the roar we could have had when it was announced that Genoa had not only let in a late equaliser, they went one better (worse?) losing 2-1.  Every cloud and all that.

Sampdoria ultras letting off flares

I’d well recommend a trip to this great and glorious city, as well as going to see a match.  I just hope the Stadio Luigi Ferraris gets a tarting up, rather than be razed and have to start all over again, cos this really is a classic venue.  I think I’ll have to come again and see a Genoa game!

Despatches:  Looking at La Gazzetta, it looks like they not only give you the attendance, but the number of season ticketholders and ‘visitors’.  Then there’s what I presume to be gate receipts listed against the ‘visitors’ number.  Can Calcio be considered so bent that they need to do this? (Don’t answer that).

Thus: ‘sperttatori paganti 4,952, incasso di €129,430, abbonati 19,012’.  So I think that means the crowd was 23,964!  I stand to be corrected on all of this.

Charlton Athletic 0-1 Barnsley, Tuesday 15 April 2014

‘Two-nil and even Kennedy scored’ or ‘Flip-flop aggro, flip-flop aggro, whoa, whoa!’

Behind the bar at the Antigallican

The relegation-fighting duo of The Captain and Geordie Al once again waved their magic, as Phil did the necessary, buying me a match programme and yet again we came away with victory.  I make that 4 wins and a draw in 5 games.  Promotion form!  (Handily, the magic doesn’t work in reverse, witness Bournemouth away). 

Well, talk about s*** or bust.  12 (free) coachloads came down, courtesy of THAT postponed game in January, and there wasn’t an away fan there who didn’t know we HAD to win last night.  There was no other option.  Even a draw and we’re certainties to go down.  Hell, even a win and we’re (virtual) certainties to go down.  All to play for!

Entrance this way, please.

1^st half, both sides struggled to create and the one chance of any note was theirs: Crainie was skinned at right back (he was playing centre half, I’ve no idea where the actual right back had gone) and a cross to the back post was met with the kind of simple header that only a side at the bottom end of the table could miss.  They did.  Meantime, our one chance was buried by that unbelievable new signing ‘Jean-Yves M’Voto’.  Did we get him in the January transfer window?  Anyway, the corner came over and M’Voto buried it with his head.  ‘He scores when he wants, he scores when he wants, Jean-Yves M’Voto, he scores when he wants’.  We saw out the rest of the half with no scares.

'He scores when he wants...'

The second half, Charlton looked like they were committing more men forward…which meant leaving more holes at the back.  Time and again we had chances to break.  Time and again we failed to create any goalscoring opportunities whatsoever out of it.  So a good job we had goalscoring machine Tom ‘TK’ Kennedy to rely on.  Or a good job he can’t cross a ball, as his latest effort sailed over the keeper….and landed in the far corner of the net.  GET THE F*** IN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  ‘We are staying up, we are staying up!’  (No, I never joined in.  There’s just something too sensible – is that the right word? – about me to join in with chants I don’t really believe in.  Along with those ‘Yorkshire Yorkshire’ chants, and anything to do with hating Sh*tfield Washday).  Tho I did enjoy one of the worst chants I've heard this side of the Kevin Betsy song, as the away end opened with 'Two-nil and even Kennedy scored'.  It's a syllable thing.

The Valley

Anyway…where was I?  Oh yes, I was dancing down the gangway cuddling anyone and everyone.  (Disappointingly, no teletubbies this week).  There’s no way Chorlton (and their wheelies) are coming back from this.  And they didn’t!  Even the addition of substitute Mellis to proceedings (just to give them a chance) didn’t really make a difference and, honestly, time flew by, in a way it normally doesn’t when we have a lead.  As I said to Selwood with a minute left – ‘we could do with them scoring just to make it interesting’.  And they did.  A scramble in the box off a corner and it’s 1-2.  Hilariously, the ref then calls 5 minutes of injury time.  Where did he get THAT from?  Thank god they didn’t equalise, cos I think I’d have had no teeth after my earlier comments.

FIVE minutes????

*** M’Voto.  He’s magic you know.  You’ll never get past M’Voto!  Awesome.  Who is this dude?  Remember Darren Moore when we won at Charlton the other year?  ’He’s here, he’s there, he’s every f***ing where’.  Well, that was Jean-Yves last night.  And a goal to boot.

** TK.  Decent enough game and deft chip to the back post for the winner.  Think of Hoddle scoring THAT goal against Watford in the mid 80s.

* Crainie.  The names might change, but our central defensive partnership continues to be the rock that’s holding this team together.

Despatches:  Reading the programme, does anyone know who’s created the most goals for us this season?  Is it a) midfield genius Jacob Mellis, b) wing wizard Dale ‘he used to play for Bayern Munich you know’ Jennings or c) Godlike genius Tom ‘TK’ Kennedy?  

Yes indeedie, proving that if you play enough games and gently dink enough balls into the opposition box, you will be credited with creating any subsequent goals bundled in.  Good on yer, Tom!  (I’ve always liked yer!)

As for players’ performances, they huffed and puffed but once again the defence shone.  Steele barely had a save to make, certainly nothing of note. The midfield ran about.  Jennings kept slipping over.  (I’d play with studs, myself.)  And O’Grady held up the odd ball without ever looking like scoring. All in all, a typical Barnsley performance, without the typical result.

Afterwards, we ran the Charlton gauntlet on the way to the station, which consisted of an older lady telling me (politely) we’ll see each other next season…in division 3.  We told her we’d won the battle, but they’d win the war.  I love Charlton, everyone’s so nice.  Even their hooligans come in flip-flops, as Barnsley baited Charlton on the station and one or two of their boys were getting all hot under the collar on the opposite platform.  If this was St. Andrew’s, Molyneux, Bramall Lane, et al, you’d have seen their lot legging it back over the bridge to shake our hands.  As it was…

Onwards and upwards.  Come on you Reds!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A

ps, mention in despatches to Dave’s mate, ‘Nice guy’ Jamie.  3 games – Brighton, Reading and Charlton away – 3 wins.  I suggest we chip in for a season ticket for him next season.

pps, and good to see Kev last night, back from representing England in an over 50s chess tournament in Croatia (as you do).

Away: dunno.  Maybe 1000? 

Barnsley 0-1 Burnley, Tuesday 8th April 2014

‘At least we’ve got work tomorra’

The away end fills up...

It comes to something when your mate tries to cheer you up with the above when you leave the ground.  4 home games without a goal.  A run in which I can only remember us missing one chance (M’Voto’s header, last game).  At least we had an excuse for our zero shots on goal this week: Burnley are actually a good side.  But, really, it’s the form of a team about to be relegated.  Which we are. 

...and some more

I made the effort to come up, midweek, partly out of optimism.  I fancied us.  Burnley might be near the top but they possibly had both star forwards out (turned out to be one) and no Trippier (on the bench, back from injury).  Obviously, any such optimism was killed as soon as Hicksy showed me the team in the pub: Mellis and Woods back, Lawrence (tired?) and Etuhu (suspended) out.

And for the first four minutes, we were camped in their half (note: the bit between their box and the halfway line).  Then they ripped us to pieces 3 times in a little over a minute, doing that cheeky thing opposition teams do, where they pass and move quickly while we stand watching them.  And after six and a half minutes, from such an attack, they scored the only goal of the game.

Everyone in who wants in.

A cross came in from their left and BANG! a great header from Burnley’s 3^rd choice centre forward.  This has peeved me for years with Barnsley FC forwards, but why do we stand behind defenders, presumably hoping their fellow professional footballers will completely miss the ball….while ‘proper’ centre forwards take a risk, RUN IN FRONT of defenders and hope the ball goes there?  And if it does – GOAL.  99.9% of Lineker’s goals came this way, and he wasn’t a bad goalscorer.  And Ashley Barnes’ (who?) goal for Burnley wasn’t bad either – leaving Nyatanga for dead.  The header itself was a blinder, but the power of the cross made it.  (Ok, another problem at Oakwell, our ‘crosses’ are neat little dinks into the box from Tom ‘TK’ Kennedy).

ps, for the younger kids, (Loko), Lineker wasn’t always some cheesy presenter on Match of the Day.  He used to be England’s centre forward in the late 80s, early 90s and alongside Ian Rush (look him up) was problies the finest (British) finisher of his day.

And there it was, game over with 83 minutes to play.  Burnley continued to play us off the park in the 1^st half, but couldn’t find that killer pass.  WE resorted to ‘hoof ball’ (as Salisbury called it).  While the midfield couldn’t be trusted to hold onto the ball for more than a couple of touches, the defence decided launching it long to a lone forward (O’Grady) up against a bigger defender (Shackell) and the rest of Burnley’s defence was the answer.  It wasn’t.  Still, while the ball was up in the air, we weren’t conceding. Obviously, those ‘Sheffield United years’ have done the world of good for Danny’s version of total football.

In summary: we were s*** and outclassed, but thank god Burnley were happy to just get one.

Sponsors MOTM: O’Grady.  No idea.

*** McLoughlin.  He reminds me of Shotton, when he was here on loan, ie, too good for us. Fast, drives forward…and prepared to tell his more experienced teammates what to do, where to go.  Shame they can’t (or won’t) follow instructions.
** M’Voto.  Won plenty of headers and showed he can kick a ball 50 yards with the best of them.
* Kennedy.  The worse we are, the better he looks.  There’s a correlation there somewhere.

Despatches:
Can’t blame Mellis, everyone else was as outclassed as him, but I did enjoy his comedy booking, as he lost control of the ball then attempted to win it back with a silly tackle. Does he EVER learn?  Taken off for Reuben, who couldn’t repeat his majesty of Yeovil and Reading.  And does Jennings need a rest?  Looked it, as time and again he’d misplace his passes.

So, that’s it, we’re down.  Charlton beating Yeovil is the proverbial nail, and not being religious, I simply cannot see a miracle happening.

No real adventures on the train this week…..the 22:43 from Donny being empty.  However, Salisbury at least got a taste of ‘Marshall Time’ as we made it to the platform at 22:42! There was tension in the car, as my dad trundled towards Donny, yet found the time to go around Stairfoot roundabout twice.  ‘We’re not gonna make it’ he kept telling us.  ‘What’s Plan B?’  ‘Plan B???  ‘Plan B is for YOU to overtake that car!’  He never did.  I’m still not sure what Plan B woulda been, but I’m sure Salisbury would not have been amused, whatever it was.  Phew!

Drink du jour: red red wine.

Away: about 4000, but the announcer never said.  They looked like they enjoyed themselves, anyway.  ‘They’ll not last long in the Premiership’ said one disgruntled, bitter fan behind me.  Good luck to ‘em – at least they haven’t bought their way there like Leicester, Cardiff, QPR et al recently.

Fair play...best team won.

Onwards and downwards