Morpeth Town 4-2 Marske United, Saturday 26th August 2023

Morpeth Town 4-2 Marske United, Northern Premier League Premier Division, Craik Park, att. 501

Having been a good boy and having spent a couple of days at the outlaws celebrating their Golden Wedding Anniversary (I’ll afford them CAPS), I was allowed out the house to tick off my most northern outpost left in the top 8 tiers of English football. In truth, I did a deal with the Devil...if I put a curtain pole up this morning, I could go. Course, the pole didn’t ‘go up’. It wasn’t long enough (10cm either side of the window not considered enough to block sunlight from creeping through). But I DID lift it above my head, so could justify it ‘had gone up’. I have a most accommodating other half.

I’d considered Darlo v South Shields, a big game (of sorts) in the National League North, but when else could I make it to Morpeth? All my Saturdays are booked up for the near future, and we’re hopefully moving soon. Morpeth would be a lot easier to get to from County Durham than the West Yorkshire Pennines. Mind, either way you’d probably need a car, the ground being a couple of miles outside the town centre (but very handy for the A1).

The ground is in the middle of forest on the edge of town, beautiful. And despite being smaller than nearby Ashington, Morpeth are a division ahead in the Northern Premier League Premier Division. Indeed, the Highwaymen have rocketed up the leagues since leaving the Northern Alliance in 1994 to join the Northern League. Their meteoric rise (4 steps) coincided with moving to their new ground, Craik Park. And nearly 30 years later, what a swish affair it is too. (I should also add that Marske have similarly risen, as they originally played each other in the Northern League.)

Despite an unassuming entrance along the side of a building, Morpeth have shown huge ambition. A large social club sits adjacent to a marquee, so plenty of room for anyone wanting an indoor beer. (Today was a beautiful late summer afternoon, perfect for taking your beer out.) The marquee had a few picnic tables outside, with a balcony overlooking the pitch. A grand view and where I was parked for most of the match.

Opposite, is a much longer stand which, although high up, only has two rows of seating. Again, the height allows folk a good view, despite people stood in front, pitchside, inbetween the 2 dugouts, oddly halfway in either half. Behind the goal to the left is cover, and a step of terracing (how many steps does it take to form a ‘terrace’?) while opposite here is a couple of steps and no cover, though the whole ground is tightly enclosed with a tasteful wooden fence. None of this metal rubbish. The ground is completed by a bizarre, and steep, little temporary stand on hire, presumably until they get relegated. All in all, a super little ground with plenty of quirks to amuse the groundhopper. Oh, and a plastic pitch. I wouldn’t normally be a fan, but I’ve seen pics of the previousl mudbath, so perhaps it’s for the best. Plus I saw one of them underground hoses for the first time at a non-league ground. They really have invested here, though the chairman sounded like a desperate man in the programme, ‘even hitting an average of 500 would alter the future of our great club’. Today there were 501.

Midtable Morpeth were hosting 2nd off bottom Marske. We may be 4 games in , but the visitors are struggling, 1 win in 4…and even that was unconvincing, cos I was there. With a great view and a beer in my hand, I leant on the balcony and enjoyed a fair amount of possession from Morpeth, but no cutting edge. Then, just before half-time, Chimalilo cut outside the home defence and hit a ball from 20 yards into the near post. I can only imagine it took a deflection, cos I’d hate to cast aspersions on the keeper.

At half-time I chatted to the bloke beside me. He’d really foxed me first half with his Northumbrian accent and cheering on of Marske, but it turns out he was from Morpeth…and was father of the visiting the keeper...who also lived in Morpeth and coached Morpeth’s junios keepers. Are you keeping up (no pun, etc)? Needless to say, with his links to Morpeth’s junior teams, the junios camped behind his goal 2nd half to dish out some bantz. And within 3 minutes of the re-start, Morpeth were level, as the ball was drilled home from close range.

Morpeth went ahead again...game over I was thinking...but Marske legend Adam ‘Bosh’ Boyes hit his 4th goal of the week to level. Last season he was the top scorer in the FA Cup and was rewarded with a trip to Wembley for the final. And why not!? Sadly, the Highwaymen robbed Marske of the points with a couple fo strikes soon after. The second was an absolute pearler, 20 yards, top corner, with the outside of his right foot, by sub Jack Foalle. The keeper’s dad warned me when he came on he was good. ‘I don’t understand why he doesn’t start.’

I took the 4th as my cue for a ‘comfort break’ and a walk round the rest of the ground. ‘What do you think of the (away) keeper?’ I asked a bemused youngster behind the net. He obviously been warned about talking to middle aged men. ‘Errr...he’s alright’. ‘Cos he’s from Morpeth isn’t he? I’ve been talking to his dad.’

I reached the balcony again just as the ref blew for full-time. Dad could be proud. His son had pulled off a few saves, and none of the goals were his fault. That’s what matters most when you’re in goal, right?

The Damage:
£12 ent
£2 prog
£4.50 San Miguel (pint)
= £18.50

Marske United 3-1 Bamber Bridge, Tuesday 22nd August 2023

Marske United 3-1 Bamber Bridge, Northern Premier League Premier Division, Mount Pleasant, att. 392

With a house purchase in the Yorkshire Pennines on the go, time is starting to run out on getting to grounds here in the north-east. In the top 8 tiers I’m missing 2 in the north east, Marske and Morpeth…and by the weekend I’ll have been to both. Tonite, it’s a trip to the Yorkshire coast, but it’s an easy drive, Marske being just the other side of Redcar. Indeed, Redcar Athletic is closer to Marske’s ground than it is to their town rival Town.

Marske have done very well for themselves in recent years. How does a village, with a population one-fifth the size of Redcar, manage to have a football team 2 tiers higher? I asked the father of one of the players and he doesn’t know either, whether they’re bankrolled or not. What is not in doubt is that Marske have had an upward trajectory in recent times, being in the 11th tier (the Wearside League) until 1985.

Not having enough intelligence to get here early and savour the seaside, I parked up around the corner from the ground with 15 or so minutes to kick-off. I didn’t risk going down the one track lane to Mount Pleasant, though it turned out there was room in the car park(s). After a couple of photos, I spied the programme seller. ‘Limited edition’ he told me, ‘Only 50 printed’. Really? ‘No, not really, but it sounds better dun’t it?’ Respect. He got my money all the same.

I had no time for the social club outside, but there was a can bar inside. All the favourites, if by ‘favourites’ you mean a list of alcoholic beverages I don’t drink. Coors, Fosters, Guinness, Strongbow Dark. Nevermind, I have a pocket full of Opal Fruits and a ground to root around. Turns out I’ve entered right by the corner flag. Behind the goal is a small covered structure with the end backed by a wooden fence tight to the touchline. The opposite end is the same, fronting on to the gardens of a row of semis.

The far side also backs onto gardens, though a small bank proves useful to many of the locals. I elect to stand on this side, siding with a TV gantry on scaffolding which hogs the halfway line. Across from me is the main stand behind which is the silhouette of a church. Lovely. Another low-slung stand sits beside it, both with about 4 rows of seating.

Tonite Marske face Bamber Bridge and come up surprising 3-1 victors, arch goalscorer Adam Boyes with a hattrick. How do they afford him? Fans on the small terrace beside the entrance make the most of it, chanting ‘you’re just a s*** town in Blackpool’ at the shellshocked visitors. How they have lost, only they will know. Marske only had one tactic – kick it to Boyes. And it worked.

The Damage:
£12 ent
£2.50 prog
= £14.50

*Less than 3 weeks later Marske went bust, all their results for the season annulled. I guess they couldn’t afford Adam Boyes after all.