Oxford United 2-2 BFC, Tuesday 29th January 2019

‘He’s a Poundland Andy Carroll.’

The view from the car park.

I thought I’d give it a week.  Y’know, to calm down and all.  But I have have had it up to here (raises hand very high) with that keeper of ours.  At Oxford he made not one, not two, but three classic Davies errors as we all saw what an ‘all-rounder’ he is. Chuck in some s*** kicking (well, he is a bit of a sh*tkicker) and we have the bloke who is about to break the record for number of clean sheets in a Barnsley shirt.  Go figure.  (I’ll figure it; 2 division 3 promotions – here’s hoping – and a period, a long long time ago, in a galaxy, far, far away, when he was half decent.)

Anyone remember Meccano?

Major error #1 comes off a corner.  A ball arcs to the back post and Davies watches..nay, GAWPS…as their forward moves 4 yards to head the ball in from 2, while a statuesque Adam couldn’t move one yard (stretching his arm out gives him another yard). Is it this zonal defence we’ve heard so much about? Cos that might explain Davies’ unwillingness to ever move off his line for corners.  Yes, so Cavare didn’t do great with the first header, but that ball which looped back was in the air forever.  We were side on to it and saw the whole thing. Pre-corner, Ollie said ‘You watch, Al, Davies will pluck this.’  10 seconds later, the same moustachioed gentleman leant forward: ‘You were right, Al.’  (We’d had a conversation all about Davies in the car.)

A sparse home end.

Let’s be blunt, it was no more than Oxford deserved as we’d pretty much been garbage till this point, save for a cleverly worked free kick where we pulled it back for someone (Mowatt?) to scuff it to their keeper.  We thought it was Mowatt, cos it was the finish of a left footed player on his right foot, but that wouldn’t make sense, would it, playing the ball onto Mowatt’s RIGHT foot? But it would have been in keeping with the performance thus far.

Then a ball down their right.  The defence are chasing back, no danger yet…but who’s this careering 25 yards out of his goal? Why it’s Captain Calamity.  Who has NO CHANCE of getting to that ball first, so, as their striker lifts the ball over him, he turns and watches, nay GAWPS (like the rest of us; we all were on this one) as the ball floats towards goal. Is it going in? Going wide? It hits the bar.  A stock-still Davies suddenly gets the run on and hounds it back to goal while their player chases the rebound. Davies is back on his line to make the save (a point those watching on telly at home have made).  But what galls was the way he just stood and stared until the ball hit the bar.  Davies would have been first to that rebound if he’d chased back straightaway.

Pointless building a 4th side, I guess.

We scrape in at half time.  We’ll make changes, come back stronger and wake the hell up.  What happens is we continue as we were for another 25 minutes.  Oxford go two up with an absolute gift.  A hoofed clearance lands midway in our half and as Lindsay chases back, the obvious thing is to head it to the keeper.  Only Davies has hared it out again and by the time the ball comes down for Lindsay, he’s possibly too close to head it; get it slightly wrong and the ball would be past Davies for a tap-in to them.  So he attempts to shield the ball back to Davies, and somehow…somehow…their guy wraps his leg around, gets a nick and runs in to lay it into an empty net.  Our only hope is the ref gives a foul, but really, no-one is complaining (at the ref).  We see it for what it is: an absolute balls-up between keeper and centre half.  Replays show the ball to be in the box when their bloke nicks it.  Davies looks distraught.  Good.

Thereafter, Davies pulls out save after save, in particular from headers at corners.  He’s not helped by Pinnock and Lindsay, who haven’t won a header all night.  Are their blokes just TALLER?  They don’t look it.  All I can think of is this zonal marking, where their players get a run on for the jump, while ours have a standing start (see also: Luton away).  Whisper it, but Davies KEEPS US IN IT.  But it’s no use ‘keeping us in it’ when you've gifted them two goals.  We are never going to score.

The Main Stand.  Population: sparse.

Then it happens: a give and go from Brown, a low cross, a Thiam tap-in.  Where’s this quality been hiding all night?  Thiam is instantly hauled off.  That’ll teach him. The fans have woken up again and we really go at Oxford now.  20 minutes to get an equaliser and with 11 to go, Kiefer delivers.  Brown is running down the left, Kiefer is pointing where he wants it and Brown puts it on a plate. Great finish though.  The unthinkable could be on – we could win this game.  Oxford look dead on their feet, we continue to press, but we only come close once, Brown cutting inside from the left, curling one in and the keeper making a super save.  I forget who said they’d have had Brown’s babies had he bagged.  Probably all of us.

So, a draw, and as we left, it was mainly a sense of relief rather than disappointment.  We’d got away with one.  This could…should…have been a Wycombe or Shrewsbury.  Instead, it’s a point towards promotion. You can’t win ‘em all.  Not with this keeper.

In a word: goalkeeper

Onwards and upwards!

*** Brown.  Brad Potts R.I.P.  The King is dead.  Long live Browny! 
** Williams.  He may be slow, but he’s definitely improving.
* Kiefer.  For the finish.

Londontykes' MOTM:  1. Brown  2. Ben Williams  3. Moore

A sheepish goalkeeper faces the travelling hordes...

Despatches:

I knew that pre-match music was a bad omen: Republica’s ‘Let’s Get Ready To Go’ a la Sunderland (lost).  

Those Londontykes came from far and wide tonite.  Including a car full from Kentish Town (cheers, Dave).  Mind, Lord S wasn’t happy when Ollie unleashed a bag full of craft beer in the back.  Very nice it was too, wish I could name-check it.  Still, Dave should try driving around France with everyone else smoking ganja and a crate of booze on the backseat, if he wants to know ‘annoying’.  Chill, man.  But it was good to see Stu (his local game), Milton Keynes finest…Kev had made it from Way Out East…did I see Jim Armitage?  The S.H.I.T.S. had made it up from Hampshire (though the Naval One needs his eyes rubbing, giving Davies a mark) and Nozzer had been given a lift from that there Barnsley.  Shame child issues had prevented Wadd from making it, our 1^st ever visit to the three-sided middle-of-nowhere shed that is the Kassam Stadium.  How we’d have got back without a lift I know not.  A horrid, horrid, ground.  One nice / strange touch tho: Oxfrod produce a home AND away programme! (Well, home and away front cover – I did wonder why the programme had a picture of Alex Mowatt in a REDS’ shirt on the front.)  Still, it marks a remarkable turnaround for our current star player; last year he was on loan at Oxford, warming their bench.

Drink du jour: A couple of crafties behind a narked driver.

Away: 657.  Like Pompey's infamous 'crew'.About the only area of the ground with a crowd. 

The Damage:
£24 ent
£15 car hire/petrol
= £39

The Tunes:
Thinking About Myself  (Cosmic Baby)