‘plus ça change’
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| Welcome to Crawley! |
The more things change, the more they remain the same. Directionless under Wilson, now absolutely
rudderless under his minions Burton and Heckingbottom (a new comedy duo?) According to Chief Exec Mansford, we’ve
despatched with Wilson with half an eye on season tickets for next season. Well, I’d be more concerned about what
division we’re in as we slumped to a 7th away defeat in a row,
mauled by a side beaten by 5 at home to Doncaster in midweek. It wasn’t pretty, as Reds fans cheered
Crawley’s 5th, chants of ‘you’re not fit to wear the shirt’ and many
leaving 59 minutes in (3-0). Yet it all
looked so easy.
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| Don't be fooled, Crawley's not all concrete |
For 40 minutes there was only one team in it – us. Of course, those 40 minutes barely registered a chance, as the closest we got to scoring was a Holgate flick from a corner, superbly tipped onto the bar by the keeper. Still, no rush – there’s an entire half to look forward to. According to Burton ‘We restricted them to hardly nothing’. Great, we’ve employed someone who can’t even speak English proper. Still, at least he admitted ‘3 or 4 threw the towel in’. If only he’d been brave enough beforehand to make a few changes; instead, it was virtually an unchanged line up, save for Holgate’s return.
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| Londontyke legend 'Ooh Gerry Gerry'. Hair colour: unknown. |
1-0 A punt down the middle in 1st half injury time is flicked on (are you reading this Waring?) and the centre halves watch as McLeod runs past them to lob over a stranded Turnbull. How many times has Turnbull been lobbed this season? He’s no Manuel Neuer.
2-0 A beautiful inswinging free kick gives the defence and keeper the sh*ts. Everyone misses it, Turnbull parries and the rebound is most definitely not picked up by anything in a Barnsley shirt.
3-0 Identical free kick, this time headed home. ‘To be fair’ (as Danny would’ve said) they were great free kicks. If I was the defender who gave the 2nd free kick away, I might have learnt from what happened after the 1st one and wouldn’t. 59 minutes gone and time for Selwood, Norris and Molly to leave.
3-1 Inspired substitutions (ho ho) as everyone’s favourite, Hemmings, comes on and bags a close range header after Oates wins it in the air (are you reading this, Waring?)
4-1 Normal service resumes. Nyatanga somehow gives the ball away on the edge of our box and the early shot completely flummoxes a hapless Turnbull who palms it in. How many times has Turnbull done THAT this season? (Dunno, but he did it last week at Swindon).
5-1 Scowan gives it away on the halfway line but can’t catch a bloke who has to control a ball and run at the same time.
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| Next match...last Tuesday. |
*** Holgate. Welcome back Mason. I’m sorry you missed your chance to go in January.
** Smith. We concede 5 and I make our fullbacks the best players. What does THAT say about the centre halves and keeper? Bizarrely taken off to make way for M’Voto at centre half and Nyatanga switched to left back.
* I have no idea. Hemmings. He bagged. And cos everyone keeps telling me he’s s***. (What, worse than anyone else we have up front?) His goalscoring record is certainly better than Lita, Waring, etc etc
Londontykes top 3:
1. Holgate
2. Scowen
3. Pearson
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| My view. I wish that post had been wider. |
Despatches:
Nyatanga had a ‘mare. Was he deliberately shifted to left back so that he had to run the gauntlet of Reds fans? (Sample line: ‘Nyatanga! Tek that f***ing shirt off. You’re a disgrace.’) There’s just no way he was moved out cos Smith was having a poor game. Waring. Why? Is Rhys Oates REALLY that bad that we’d rather give this Stoke plodder a game ahead of him? Lita was given a runout and even managed a few touches before being dragged off. Hourihane had the kind of game he’s been having since the start of October. Undroppable. Scowan seems to be a new favourite but I haven’t seen anything in him. Running back after giving the ball away is the LEAST I expect, that’s not ‘a good effort’. He still failed.
Nyatanga had a ‘mare. Was he deliberately shifted to left back so that he had to run the gauntlet of Reds fans? (Sample line: ‘Nyatanga! Tek that f***ing shirt off. You’re a disgrace.’) There’s just no way he was moved out cos Smith was having a poor game. Waring. Why? Is Rhys Oates REALLY that bad that we’d rather give this Stoke plodder a game ahead of him? Lita was given a runout and even managed a few touches before being dragged off. Hourihane had the kind of game he’s been having since the start of October. Undroppable. Scowan seems to be a new favourite but I haven’t seen anything in him. Running back after giving the ball away is the LEAST I expect, that’s not ‘a good effort’. He still failed.
It really was abysmal.
So much so we’re being offered our money back. I went thinking we might never play at the
Checkatrade.com Stadium (!) ever again, but after that performance, I’m not so
sure. They’re going down – what’s to say
we’re not?
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| That Big Top feeling. Welcome to the BFC circus. |
At least it was a decent pre-match effort, as attendance at the Brewery Shades was top notch. Lots of real ale on tap, followed by a taxi to the ground. Handily, we got a bus back from outside the away end for a quick getaway. Oh, and Crawley even had their own old-skool programme shack, selling plenty of old Barnsley home and away progs. Will I come to regret not buying that Wartime Cup programme v Chesterfield in 1945?
Drink du jour: Kronenburg for me, Sliding Tackle or somesuch for the bitterers.
Crowd: 2,296 (425 away, Burton told me so). I was looking forward to standing on a terrace, but instead we were herded into some temporary seating with a sort of ‘Big Top’ roof. Perfect for the circus we were about to witness.
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| Welcome to the Checkatrade.com Stadium. I kid you not. |
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| Canny business, the breezeblock trade. |
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| Away turnstyles |
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| Home end. Literally dozens of 'em. |
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| Sexy L shaped cover (repeated at home end) |
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| Can it get any worse? (Yes). |
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| Are they 40 watt bulbs or 60? |
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