Blackpool 1-2 BFC, Saturday 19th October 2024

‘Coke must have been on special offer in Barnsley that day.’

Is this how it’s going to be this season? Play poorly, but eke out just enough results to stay on the coat tails of the play-off pack, before finally succumbing to 8th? Cos if you haven’t seen this victory before, see also ‘Lincoln City’ and ‘Burton Albion’. The fans have obviously lost belief. We barely took a thousand on Satdy, one half of the stand completely empty. This is Blackpool away, FFS. One of the jewels in the crown of away games (stop laughing at the back). It was a turgid game lightened up with 3 goals that all came out of nowhere.

For those who hadn’t heard, we caught in-form Blackpool at the right time, manager Steve Bruce away on compassionate leave following the death of his four month old grandchild. He was replaced by perma-sidekick and former Reds legend Steve Agnew. The match was accordingly disjointed and lacking in both skill and excitement. Mind, a couple of Londontykes watching it on telly thought it was alright. Maybe the drink had taken its toll (on me). It was RUBBISH.

Still, we went ahead after something approaching half an hour of nothing happening. A smooth move began in our half ends with DKD cutting inside and stroking it home, a carbon copy of his debut strike. I said it was out of the blue. Where did THAT come from!? Blackpool missed a few half chances and there was no way we deserved a lead, but a lead we had. Could we build on it?

No. The teams swapped ends and proceeded to give us the same dirge we had 1st half. I pity the poor neutral (not for the first time). Blackpool were in the slight ascendancy, nothing unduly worrying, when a free kick was lofted over and none of our 3 centre halves dealt with it. I think it came off the forward’s foot eventually. A ball into the danger zone allowed to drop for someone to sweep it into the corner. P*** poor. Another timely substitution, as Coach Clarke had hauled Russell (for Craig) and Phillips (for Yoganathan) a minute earlier. He really is unlucky / s*** our manager, isn’t he?

Nothing continues to happen, until injury time. Coach Clarke hauls Humphreys for Jalo (I didn’t realise the latter was back from his hurty shoulder at Burton) before sending on Pines for Gent, presumably to get the winner. Well, it’s not Pines, but a minute later Connell sends a hopeful corner to the backpost and Marc Roberts loops a header back to the other post, where the defender has gone AWOL. (Have a look at it on youtube, the defender’s efforts are very funny. Indeed, it’s criminal he doesn’t deal with it.) We have STOLEN another away win. I can’t pretend the match was anything other than awful, it really was. Can we go home now?

Onwards and upwards!

*** Roberts. Apart from their goal (and I think Roberts bears most blame) he was solid. Oh, and scored.
** DKD. I have absolutely no memory of anyone else playing well, so DKD for the Litmanen (quality finish).
* Slonina. Reedy can hopefully vouch for me commenting that Slonina hadn’t put a foot wrong and couldn’t be to blame for the goal.

Londontykes’ MOTM: TBA

Despatches:
On the way out, I saw a couple of fans being handcuffed (‘fancuffed’?)...damaging seats...but the way the copper explained it to me, he thought I didn’t think ripping out seats and attempting to abscond with them was a crime. He should have been at Man City home the other year when their fans nicked an entire toilet door!

Pre-match was great. Beer on the pier with Andy, beer in the market with Andy, beers in the Tap room with Andy. An Oirishman explaining to me how he was from Oiland, as if I didn’t know what an Oirish accent sounded like. Being complimented by Tangerines for getting off the beaten track to find quality beer (but of course!) It was a world away from the promised coke fuelled aggro that follows Nice Guy Chris to Blackpool (he was boycotting it).

The players? I have no memory of any of ‘em. I’ve just looked at the line up and have zero reminisces of Phillips or Humphreys. Did they REALLY play? Ditto O’Keefe and Gent. And I just presumed MdG and Earl played, cos they always do. Was Connell his normal s*** self? I have no idea. I can tell you we had 2 shots on target (cos that’s what the BBC website tells me), so I’ll let youse work out how many saves their keeper made. For the record they had 5 shots on target. It was meagre gruel. Pls sir, don’t give me more.

Drink du jour: Beavertown Neck Oil on the pier, Mango Unchained in Abingdon St. Market, Lichfield Pale Ale, Sundown IPA, Thistly Cross Whisky Cask cider at the Cask & Tap. Leffe on the train home, Leffe and Elvis Juice on the train there. Come to think, there’s a reason I can’t remember much beyond ‘this is s***’.

Away: 1,598

The Damage:
£30 ent (!)
£20 train
= £50