And what does this mean for next season? Even Satdy 3pm games are randomly re-scheduled for lunchtime, or Sunday, or even Friday nite (Mansfield home). Some of us can get to every home game and may renew regardless, but why? The club, desperate to actually have a crowd, are so full of offers (‘bring a mate for a tenner’) you could just elect to come and see 6-10 home games when the discount rates are offered – as long as you still know an actual season ticket holder. Satdy was NOT one of these games tho. Andy’s mate Chris paid 26 quid and, surprisingly, didn’t feel it was money well spent by full-time. (Our time in the pub was post-match rather than pre-match. Again, I prefer a pint PRE match. Before the match, you THINK you’ll be poor. After the match you KNOW it.)
On Satdy we eked out a nil-all against Burton Albion, a side who were in the Northern Premier League when I first saw the Super Reds in 80-81 (and they really WERE ‘super’ in those days). Last time out at Oakwell, we were failing to score against Stevenage, who were in the United Counties League Division 1. No, me neither. They were playing the likes of British Timken Duston, Corby Gainsborough and Higham Town (not that one), while we played in front of 25,000 against Rovrum. It seems a world away.
But shouldn’t all this be in ‘Despatches’? Ah, yes. The problem is, if I wrote about the game (nil nil) there wouldn’t be a lot to say. I can say this: we must have played well, cos Coach Clarke told em at half-time to continue what they were doing. At least we had a few (long) shots tho, mainly from Phillips. DKD had one charged down by the keeper, while this week’s hapless centre forward (Humphreys) cut inside to hit a shot on target, but otherwise struggled. I think Pines hit the post in a scramble, but otherwise, the closest we got (I’m told) was Lofthouse clearing the bar when clean through. I say ‘I’m told’. There was an injury and I’d decided I’d rather spend quality time in the men’s toilets than wait for their man to recover.
Still, no Roberts. Clean sheet! No Kilip. Clean sheet! No clue from the opposition forwards. Clean sheet! Yes, that Burton didn’t score had little to do with our defence and everything to do with two incredible misses. Twice, all they had to do was square it for a tap-in. The first time, their bloke tried to control it and failed. I can’t remember what happened to the second, but I remember how it occurred: Pines and Earl got in each others’ way down our left and their bloke ran through them. (Earl had earlier tried to give them a goal, while Pines spent the afternoon simply trying to stand up without falling over. I’ve seen untrained seals with better ball control, that’s for sure.)
Onwards and upwards!
*** Phillips. Excellent technique in hitting 3 long shots on target.
** Nwakali. Played some pretty football.
* The new keeper. Didn’t have anything to do save-wise, but punched or collected every cross.
Official MOTM: Nwakali.
Londontykes’ MOTM: 1. Nwakali 2. Phillips 3= O’Keeffe / Russell
Despatches:
I feel for Ben Kilip. Along with MdG, he’s been our most consistent player since I’ve come back. (Yeah, yeah, Connell and Watters have been pretty consistent too!) So obviously, in a side struggling to score a goal, he’s the one needing replaced. To be harsh, I’m not saying he can’t be improved upon, but there’s other areas that command greater focus. Instead, we’ve got an Australian Aston Villa loanee who’s name might be something like Gauche. I’ve no idea. Can’t be ar5ed to look it up.
Mind, so much for lording MdG as our ‘footballing centre half’ last week. He couldn’t put a foot right on Satdy, regularly over running the ball or misplacing a pass. After a game or 2 out, I’ll put it down to ‘lack of match fitness’! O’Keefe had a promising 1st half, without creating anything, before disappearing. Who was this week’s left back? Why, Kyran Lofthouse was given a trot out. 3rd choice a fortnite ago after signing F...whatever the Oirish bloke’s called...he’s suddenly overtaken Gent for a start. His input was such that he was the first to be hauled. Yes, needing a goal, Coach Clarke sends on Georgie Gent at left back. I’ve already said Earl was pretty hapless, and at least Roberts’ suspension meant we CAN only play him or Pines. Though with Clarke’s fabled ‘5 outstanding centre halves’, surely there’s the option to play neither? DKD had a couple of moments, but not enough, while Humphreys looked lost as a centre forward. He appears all muscle, but has absolutely zero presence. He needs a few lessons from the 5 ft 9 Neil Shipperley (and I don’t mean on what to get up to when alone and bored in a van).
Still, I shouldn’t moan. The genie I unleashed last week finally gave me my wish: a side without Roberts, Connell and Watters and we achieve a spectacular goalless draw against a side who were bottom of the table last time I looked. (However, I’m told they'd won 3 in a row and scored 9 goals, so maybe it’s a good point!!!)
Drink du jour: House Party IPA in Spiral City.
Away: 302 (10,555...allegedly).
The Damage:
c.£8 petrol
= c.£8
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