Again, Kev led the way on directions. He’s getting better at this, and we pass Droylsden’s Butcher’s Arms Ground before parking up on a side street. All good, though the football club appears surprised by numbers; only 2 turnstiles open and with one for concessions, a healthy queue snakes down the street until someone has the common sense to make both turnstiles open for all. The groundhoppers’ coach had also arrived, and well done DFC for furnishing everyone with teamsheets as they decanted the bus.
I settled for a programme, accosted as we were as soon as were through the turnstiles, in much the same way chuggers operate in Carnaby Street. Then, another long queue. Quick! Let’s join it. I presume it’s for food (it is) and after a disappointing sausage sandwich at Abbey Hey, I’m ready to be disappointed again. (I am, yet in another sense, I’m not, for if I am ready to be disappointed, and I am disappointed, aren’t I satiated in my prediction that I would be disappointed? I don’t know.) Kev reconnoitres the menu. ’14 award winning pies’ it proclaims, though by the time we reach the front there is only cheese and onion. Maybe they meant 14 pies on sale in total?
After hearing grumblings from those in front about the prices, Kev decides to spend £7 on a not wholly satisfying cheeseburger, while my hotdog confirms what I thought last game: these people must leave the bread rolls out all nite to get the right crisp/staleness. Or is this the texture of cheap buns? Kev gets an idea of life as a groundhopper as one moans that an upcoming groundhopping weekend in Scotland only has 4 new grounds (of 6) to see. Kev and I have a long way to go.
By now, the teams are out. Didn’t Droylsden go bust a few years back and have to start again? I am corrected. ‘Went on sabbatical.’ Turns out they withdrew from the Northern Premier League in August 2020, before folding for the 2021-22 season due to the financial pressures of Covid. Consequently, the ground is a grade or 2 above the North West Counties Division 1. The main stand is a modern brick fronted affair, while behind one goal is a large terrace, covered in its entirety. There’s a healthy four figure crowd and still plenty of space. (Capacity 3,000, including 500 seats.) But who are the home fans taunting with ‘what’s it like to see a crowd?’ Groundhoppers? Darwen? Themselves?
Kev and I find a perch near the corner flag, the perimeter slightly cutting the corner, to afford us an even better view. After the previous match ended goalless, we are rewarded early; the Bloods head in from a corner. The Bloods? Yes, NOW I know what that mascot was meant to be, pre-match. A drop of blood! I did wonder. On the one hand, it looked like a drop of blood. On the other...that CAN’T be a drop of blood. Was it left over from some NHS giving blood campaign? This goal cancels out a shock effort from Darwen at the far end.
At half time, I bump into a Hearts fans who I met last year on the same weekend. He regales me with trips this season to see Hearts in Europe…Copenhagen, etc...they’re one of those teams it must be great to support…you get to Europe, but don’t get far enough to bankrupt yourself, just enough to see 2 or 3 new grounds before repeating the process next year. (I didn’t tell him this.)
Second half, we walk through the terrace to the far side, a narrow, covered stand, whose pillars and supports are wooden, rather like a Tudor mansion house (but not as safe). Surprisingly, there’s a juicy space right on the halfway line. As far as I can tell, everyone here is a groundhopper, as we delight in random conversations with random travellers. (‘What do YOU think of Alan Shearer as a pundit?’) We also pass two doggies in club colours and I share my big idea with Kev: a photographic book, ‘Non-League Dogs’. On further examination, I am encouraged to share my vision, a hardback, coffee table book, full of glorious colour pictures. ‘Will they be given any context?’ What do you mean? ‘Like where it is, who’s playing?’ Of course!
By now, The Bloods are 2-1 up and look like they’re going to run away with it. However, a spanner is thrown as Darwen equalise. It’s not undeserving either, the visitors enjoying good possession in their opponents’ half. However, just as the shock is on, Droylsden break and the ball is blasted high into the net from an angle. (I know, I know, all shots are ‘from an angle’. Even straight ones.)
The masses are happy. Home players go to the terraced end to receive their acclaim, while us groundhoppers muse on a five goal thriller. Exit isn’t through the giftshop though, we continue our anti-clockwise navigation via the other goal, an open, flat standing end with the boundary fence tight in. Maybe we’ll see them again in a division or 2 higher. If they don’t go on sabbatical.
The Damage:
£6 ent
£4 hotdog
£2 programme
= £12
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